


Eyes Without a Face

by Morgana_avalon



Category: The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-08
Updated: 2019-04-08
Packaged: 2020-01-06 22:14:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 50,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18397412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Morgana_avalon/pseuds/Morgana_avalon
Summary: Glorfindel finds out more about Erestor than he ever wanted to know and decides to *be* there for him every step of the way.





	Eyes Without a Face

Eyes without a Face

 

"I expect Glorfindel to report to me any moment now. You might want to retreat into your own study, Erestor." Elrond's compassionate tone spoke of love and understanding when he addressed his best friend and most trusted councilor. One short nod from the hooded head told Elrond that his friend would leave. "I will visit you in your rooms tonight." Reading and discussing Glorfindel's reports would take up most of his afternoon, but then he would seek out his friend again.

 

Erestor slowly moved toward the doorway. His appearance remained hidden in the dark shadows of his robes and, for that, he was grateful. A gloved hand pushed the door handle down and he opened the door. Before stepping into his study, Erestor drew in a deep shuddering breath. He was in much pain today and might retire to his private chambers early. Elrond did not mind when he failed to finish the paperwork; the half-Elf would finish it in his stead.

 

Closing the door behind him, Erestor carefully made his way over to his desk as he didn't want to take a fall. He felt weak today: his head spun, and the cuts hurt more than they normally did. With a relieved sigh, he seated himself behind his desk. His fingers trembled when they picked up the quill and he bit down on the wave of pain that washed over him. Today was just another day and he would somehow get through it.

 

~~~

 

"My Lord?" Glorfindel remained standing in the doorway, unwilling to step inside without Elrond's permission. He didn't want to intrude or disturb the Elf-Lord while he was working.

 

"Ah, Glorfindel, step inside and sit down." Elrond looked at Glorfindel and arched an eyebrow. "Remind me, just how many times did I already tell you to stop addressing me in such a formal manner?"

 

"It takes time." Glorfindel sat down on a comfortable chair and placed a pile of papers in front of Elrond on the desk. "These are the reports you asked for." Orcs had been sighted near their Eastern border and, at Elrond's request, Glorfindel had doubled the number of patrols searching the perimeter. "They have certainly crossed into your lands, my Lord."

 

"Glorfindel!" Elrond was growing exasperated. "Stop calling me that or I will have to address you in the same way."

 

Glorfindel smiled, weakly. "I beg your pardon, Elrond. This is still new to me."

 

"How long have you been in Imladris now?" Elrond asked while leafing through the reports.

 

"A little under a year." Glorfindel shifted on the chair. Being at the center of Elrond's attention made him feel uncomfortable.

 

"And for most of that time you have addressed me in a formal way. Do you not think it is about time you changed that?" Elrond leaned back into the comfort of his chair as he considered the gravity of the Orc sightings.

 

"I will try harder." This time, a more genuine smile surfaced on Glorfindel's face that also reached his eyes. Adjusting to Elrond's relaxed demeanor took time. When he had served King Turgon in Gondolin, etiquette had been strict.

 

"Let us go back to discussing these Orc sightings." Elrond glared at the latest report which informed him that the vile creatures were growing bolder and had ventured deep into his lands. "I want them shot on sight. Double the number of guards and fortify our defenses. I do not care what you have to do in order to keep them out. I do not want any of these vile creatures roaming my lands."

 

Glorfindel nodded once. "I share your concern."

 

"My sons are still little, Glorfindel, and they do not know the danger these Orcs present. If these Orcs were to capture my sons then…" The two Elflings were precious to him and Elrond would do all he could to protect his offspring.

 

"I will double the number of guards again and increase the number of patrols. Once these Orcs know that we are ready to deal with their trespassing, they will leave the lands."

 

"By Elbereth, I hope they will."

 

Glorfindel wondered about Elrond's venomous tone; was it just his imagination or was the half-Elf clawing at the wood of his arm rest? "I did not realize how much you loathed them, my… Elrond." He corrected himself at the last moment.

 

"I know the damage they can do first-hand, Glorfindel, and no Elf who lives in Imladris under my protection should have to fear them."

 

Glorfindel's eyes narrowed at hearing the word 'first-hand' and grew curious, but he knew better than to ask his Lord something that personal. "I will keep our people safe, Elrond. That is my duty and I will die fulfilling it."

 

Elrond quickly looked up from the report and glared at Glorfindel. "Do not say that! I do not want you to die performing your duty! I do not want any more sacrifices!"

 

"My Lord?" Glorfindel pushed himself to his feet as a reaction to Elrond's bitter tone. "I am Captain of Imladris…" He grew silent when Elrond raised his hand in a commanding way.

 

"I know you mean well, Glorfindel, but trust me, I do not want any more casualties."

 

Elrond's words only confused him further. "I will carry out your orders, my Lord."

 

Too upset to notice Glorfindel's slip, Elrond waved his hand, signaling Glorfindel to leave. "I want to be alone for a while."

 

"But the reports…"

 

"They will have to wait until tomorrow. Visit me here at the same hour tomorrow, Glorfindel, and go now. Leave me be." Elrond placed the paper onto the desk, rested his head against the chair, and closed his eyes.

 

Glorfindel soundlessly left his Lord's office. He had no idea what had upset Elrond, but he had seen the distraught look in the grey eyes and knew that something troubled the half-Elf. It was a pity that Elrond was reluctant to confide in him. Maybe he could have helped! But he understood Elrond's reluctance to a certain degree.

 

Almost a year ago, he had arrived at Imladris. Mithrandír had escorted him from the Havens to the Last Homely House and the Elves here had given him a warm welcome. At first, they had seemed awe-struck by his reputation, but little by little had they realized that he was *just* an Elf and not some supernatural being. And so he had become a part of the community here. He had made friends amongst the members of the guards, visited the minstrels in the Hall of Fire – where he had met and befriended Lindir – and often spent time with the Lady Celebrían and her adventurous sons, but it was taking time to gain Elrond's unconditional trust.

 

Life was good here at Imladris and Glorfindel had never heard of something ill that had befallen the Elves living here. Yes, the Orcs were something to worry about, but Elrond's reaction had appeared overdone. /Just what casualties was he talking about? All Elves here are whole, in mind and in body!/

 

Vexed because he didn't understand Elrond's emotional outburst, Glorfindel returned to the training grounds. He continued to ponder Elrond's words, though… If only they would start making sense.

 

~~~

 

Two hours later, Elrond ventured into Erestor's study and found the room empty. Hanging his head in defeat, Elrond wished for the umpteenth time that he hadn't made such a grave mistake years ago. If he hadn't been so overly confident, Erestor wouldn't be in so much pain today. But even Elrond Half-Elven couldn't change the past and he gathered his robes close around his frame. Deserting Erestor's study for the corridor, he walked toward his friend's private chambers. /He must have been in more pain that normal for him to retire this early./ And everything was his fault.

 

~~~

 

"You may enter, Elrond."

 

Elrond cringed and pushed the door handle down. Stepping into Erestor's rooms, his eyes immediately sought out his friend's silent form. Erestor sat in his favorite place – his rocking chair – and Elrond walked over to the cupboard, removing pots filled with ointment and uncovering clean bandages. "You left early."

 

"I am tired, Elrond, and I hurt." Erestor's dark eyes followed Elrond from within the hood. "Did Glorfindel appear concerned about the Orc sightings?" Erestor closed his eyes and bit into his bottom lip now that the daily torture began again. Elrond was peeling off his gloves and the raw, bleeding flesh tended to stick to the fabric. He moaned in pain and felt bad for being unable to hide his discomfort for he knew it would cause Elrond to feel even guiltier. No matter how many times he told Elrond that it hadn't been his fault, the half-Elf never listened.

 

"Not overly concerned, but I do not want any of those monsters on my lands." Elrond fought for control over his emotions as he dipped his fingers in the soothing ointment. Spreading the balm over the injured skin, Elrond raised his eyes and sought out Erestor's. "I can mix you a sleeping potion."

 

"No, thank you. I have no desire to sleep." Erestor's breathing sped up now that Elrond was assisting him out of his robes. "It feels good to be rid of them." Although the fabric was light and didn't weigh him down, he felt better when nothing irritated his skin.

 

Elrond's touch was always clinical, no matter how much ointment he soothed onto the bleeding skin. Erestor's arms, hands, back, and chest had taken the brunt of the abuse he had suffered at the hands of those Orcs years ago, and Elrond made certain each inch of skin was covered with balm before bandaging the worst affected areas. "I do not know how you can bear the pain."

 

"I do not have much of a choice, my friend."

 

Now that the hood no longer covered Erestor's face, the candle light projected eerie shadows onto the marred skin. Large cuts disfigured Erestor's face. The brow and cheeks had been slashed the worst and Elrond still felt grateful that those monsters hadn't taken Erestor's eyesight. One gash stopped just above Erestor's eyebrow and continued near the nose. As if by miracle the eye itself had remained undamaged. After moistening his lips, Elrond whispered, "I can not comprehend that you still see me as a friend, Erestor. Had it not been for my cockiness you would still be whole."

 

"I never blamed you." Erestor's eyes closed for he didn't want Elrond to see the pain in them. "That pack of Orcs took me by surprise. Even if you had expanded my escort, we would not have stood a chance."

 

"But you advised me to add more guards to your escort and I dismissed your worries. You were chanceless when those Orcs attacked you and that was my fault!" Elrond's tone was bitter and venomous, but his touch remained gentle and caring. He placed Erestor's now bandaged hands into his friend's lap and then bowed his head in surrender. "I do not know why these wounds refuse to heal, Erestor."

 

"You *do* know why, Elrond." Erestor was growing tired of their conversation, which they had carried on too many times already. "You just can not make yourself say the words."

 

Elrond swallowed convulsively and, as always, shied away from discussing the matter further. "I will attend to your back now."

 

In spite of the pain which the movement caused, Erestor smiled at Elrond. "I am not the only one who needs to heal, Elrond."

 

"Erestor, not now." Elrond's hands had turned into fists, but they opened the moment Erestor attempted to rise from his chair. Elrond caught and steadied the injured Elf and assisted him on his way over to the bed. Erestor sat down on the side and Elrond uncovered his friend's back. Like a hundred times before, he fought down the urge to hurl and removed the now dirty bandages. Beneath them appeared raw skin, still bleeding, still bruised. One of the tortures those Orcs had inflicted on Erestor was to whip him until he had lost consciousness. His back had been the target of most of the lashes, but some had strayed toward his buttocks.

 

Erestor swayed, but then he steadied himself by wrapping his arms around his waist. A moment later, he whimpered pitifully. Although the cooling balm brought relief from his constantly burning wounds, it also chilled him to the bone. "Be quick tonight."

 

"I need to take my time doing this," Elrond replied as he gently eased the balm into the cuts. If only he knew of a remedy for his friend's suffering! But all he could do was to apply that balm. Each evening he visited with Erestor, removed the bloodied bandages, applied more balm, and dressed the wounds again. There was a reason why Erestor always wore gloves and formal robes – they hid most of his injuries.

 

"That is enough." Erestor felt drained and too emotional to deal with a guilt-ridden Elrond right now. "Return to your wife and sons."

 

Obediently, Elrond began to dress the wounds, placing healing herbs between the bandages. "And what will you do, my friend?"

 

"I will do as I do each night." Erestor's eyes had closed once more, but not because it was a foreboding of sleep. They had closed because he was too exhausted to keep them open.

 

"You will lock yourself up in your rooms and shun all contact." Elrond's heart felt heavy because of Erestor's self-chosen isolation. "Why do you not join me for dinner tonight? You know that Celebrían and I want you to join us."

 

"And scare the children witless with my appearance? No." There was a reason why only Celebrían and Elrond were allowed to visit with him. He stayed clear of the Elflings, even though he would love to hold and cuddle them. They had been born before the attack and he had rocked them when they had been babies. They must have been too young to remember him, for as far as Erestor knew, they had never inquired why he had vanished.

 

Only a handful of Elves knew that he existed, that he vegetated in his rooms and study, but through Elrond Erestor had let them know not to approach him. He had chosen to be a recluse for a reason – he didn’t want to scare them and neither did he want their pity. "I will stay here and read."

 

Elrond bit his bottom lip. He had wanted to say, 'You can not even turn the pages with your hands bandaged in that way.' But he remained quiet. It was his fault that Erestor was in this bad way and he had lost the right to tell his friend what to do. "Shall I see you in my office tomorrow?" His worst fear was that one day Erestor would give up and allow himself to fade.

 

"I will be there." Erestor's voice revealed the pain he was in and he slowly lowered himself onto his side. Curled up in a fetal way, he concentrated on willing his pain to fade, but it never did, and he faced another night filled with pain and loneliness.

 

~~~

 

"He did not want to join us – again?" Celebrían's deep sigh showed her disappointment. "I should have expected that, but I still hope that he will reconsider one day."

 

The twins, still too young to truly understand what the adults were discussing, were busy moving their food around on their plates.

 

Elrond was at a loss – he had tried reaching out to Erestor too many times to count and so had his wife, but so far, no one had managed to draw Erestor from his misery.

 

~~~

 

The next day, Glorfindel returned to Elrond's study and this time he was 'armed' with even more reports. As his arms were full, he was unable to knock and simply entered his Lord's office. He was about to apologize for his unorthodox entry when he realized that Elrond wasn't alone. An Elf – or what he assumed was an Elf – stood next to Elrond and was handing him a piece of paper. The first thing Glorfindel noticed were the black gloves, which stood in sharp contrast with the white of the paper. Glorfindel's gaze swept up and encountered dark, haunted eyes in a sea of black. The hood hid the other Elf's features and only the ghostly eyes stood out.

 

"I apologize for barging in like this, but I was unable to knock and…" Glorfindel cocked his head, hearing the stranger's breathing speed up. "I do not believe we have been introduced yet. My name is Glorfindel…" And with his usual charm he added, "What is yours?"

 

Elrond's eyes resembled dark flames, but Glorfindel never noticed as he was too focused on the strange Elf. There was something odd about the way the other Elf moved, the way he smelled, and those eyes… They spoke of pain and longing.

 

"You may go now," Elrond whispered, addressing Erestor. "I will call on you later. First I must deal with Glorfindel." Glorfindel barging in like that displeased Elrond. It was Glorfindel's fault that Erestor had grown tense and it didn't surprise Elrond that his old friend was already moving toward the doorway in something that resembled flight.

 

"But you have not yet introduced yourself!" Glorfindel realized that something odd was going on and his instincts kicked in, telling him that he shouldn't give up that easily.

 

"Glorfindel, sit down and be quiet!" Elrond seldom barked orders, but this time he did. He waited for Erestor to close the door behind him and then his gaze came to rest upon his Captain. "Glorfindel, the next time you will knock!"

 

"I had my hands full!" The reports Glorfindel had been carrying now fell onto the desk with a heavy 'plop'. "I could not knock!" Trying to figure out just how displeased Elrond really was, Glorfindel asked, "Who was that?" The Elf must be someone of importance to be assisting Elrond and it was obvious that the half-Elf trusted the stranger with his paperwork.

 

Elrond drew in a deep breath. He already knew Glorfindel well enough to know that the fair-haired Elf wouldn't stop asking his questions until he had been given a satisfactory answer. "That was Erestor, my Chief Advisor."

 

"How come I never met him before? Why were we not introduced upon my arrival? I should have known about him – after all, I am your Captain and…"

 

"Glorfindel, what part of 'Be quiet' do you not understand?" Elrond counted to ten, trying to maintain control over his emotions. Glorfindel appearing like that had not only upset Erestor, but him as well. Now he had to find a way to deal with Glorfindel's curiosity without revealing too much about Erestor.

 

"I beg your forgiveness, my Lord, but… It is his eyes, you know." Glorfindel shrugged his shoulders once. "They speak of pain and I can not help but wonder why I have not heard his name before."

 

Elrond probed Glorfindel's eyes. Celebrían had repeatedly told him that she thought Erestor needed friends – companions – to fight off his depression and loneliness. But Erestor didn't seem to want any friends and Elrond had never meddled before, but Erestor's state continued to deteriorate and maybe some company would do his friend good. /Company that is not burdened down by guilt./

 

"I do not mean to pry," Glorfindel said as he straightened his shoulders. It was obvious that Elrond didn't want to discuss this and the half-Elf was his Lord and master. It wasn't his place to question the Elf-Lord.

 

Elrond felt conflicted; a part of him wanted Glorfindel to find out more about Erestor and befriend the hurting Elf, but another part told him to be careful. Erestor had told him – more than once – that he didn't desire any company. "Glorfindel, you are here to present your reports to me. What did you find?" He needed more time to make up his mind!

 

Glorfindel blinked at the sudden change in their topic, but adapted and updated Elrond. "The Orcs sightings have lessened. They might have noticed the doubled patrols and decided Imladris is not a risk worth taking. I doubt they will invade our borders again."

 

"Excellent. Maintain the doubled patrols. I am not taking any risks." Elrond pinched the bridge of his nose – his guilty conscience still weighing him down. "That was about it, Glorfindel. You can take your leave."

 

"With all due respect, my Lord, but what about Erestor?" Glorfindel knew he was treading on thin ice, but he had never been one to back away from danger.

 

"What about him?" Elrond massaged his temples. He hadn't realized before how tenacious Glorfindel could be.

 

"Do you not think we should be properly introduced? What if some disaster strikes and I need him to advise me? Do you not believe it wise that Erestor and I are on speaking terms?"

 

"Glorfindel, Erestor is *my* Advisor. He only talks to me." Elrond pushed himself to his feet and glared at Glorfindel. "You will leave – now."

 

Unable to ignore a direct order, Glorfindel rose from his chair and inclined his head in respect. "As you wish, my Lord."

 

Elrond didn't realize that Glorfindel had once more addressed him in *that* way until Glorfindel had already left his office. "What a mess," Elrond whispered to himself. He should have been more careful. Glorfindel should never have seen Erestor!

 

~~~

 

"I apologize for Glorfindel's behavior." Elrond walked toward Erestor's desk. The Elf seated behind it looked tired and worn down. Erestor's head was bowed, the shoulders had slumped forward, and the gloved hands rested idly in the other Elf's lap. "If only I could take away your pain. My heart aches seeing you in such pain day after day."

 

"Elrond, stop tormenting yourself. What happened to me was not your fault and you can not change the past. We must endure." A cut, situated on his back, had opened and blood flowed down his skin, soaking the fabric of his robes. "Elrond, it appears I need your healer's expertise…"

 

"Where?" This had happened before and Elrond moved toward the cupboard, where he kept a jar of ointment just for moments like this.

 

"My back." Erestor shakily rose from his chair, removed his robes, and waited for the cooling touch to bring relief to his burning skin.

 

Elrond bit his bottom lip, like he always did in order to keep him from pitying his friend's fate, and smeared the balm onto the cut. "Glorfindel seemed curious. He wants to make your acquaintance."

 

"I will not have it. It is a bad idea." Erestor whimpered the moment clean bandages covered his back. "Glorfindel is an excellent warrior and he serves you well, but you must smother his interest in finding out more about me."

 

"Erestor, Glorfindel made a valid point. What if something happens and the two of you need to work together?" Elrond helped Erestor back into his robes and waited for his friend to turn around to face him. "What if something happens to me and…"

 

"Elrond, I taught you a long time ago not to think about 'what ifs' as they might never happen." Erestor felt wearier with each day and already longed for the evening for then he could curl up on his bed. "You will always be here and, even if you should have to leave, Celebrían will still be here for me to talk to. It is not necessary for me to talk to Glorfindel."

 

"You are making a mistake," Elrond replied, frowning deeply. Until now, he had never spoken his doubts, unwilling to upset Erestor in whatever way, but now the dam broke. "I also believe you are making a mistake in locking yourself away. I know you are hurting… I know what happened to you, even if I do not have the courage to speak the words aloud I do acknowledge what happened, but… Erestor, we want to help."

 

Erestor fastened his dead, haunted eyes on Elrond. "Do you not understand, my friend? I am beyond help."

 

The final tone to those words made Elrond shiver. If Erestor really believed that, the other Elf had given up on himself and *was* beyond hope.

 

~~~

 

"My Lady? Please excuse me for intruding in this way, but…" Glorfindel nervously shuffled his feet. He had been in the nursery before, but back then he had come to play with the twins, not to talk to the Lady of Imladris. He didn't know Celebrían that well yet, but hoped she would be inclined to answer his questions.

 

Celebrían, in the middle of playing with her sons, looked up in surprise. "Glorfindel, what a pleasant surprise to see you!" She gestured for him to sit down and watched how Elladan immediately waddled over to the warrior. The boys had just begun to walk and were still a bit unsteady on their feet. "Elladan already adores you."

 

The Elfling looked at Glorfindel with big eyes. "Glor…findel…" He was a bit bashful and quickly averted his eyes. The warrior had played with them before, but Elladan secretly worshipped the golden-haired Elf and felt shy around him.

 

"Hello, little one." Glorfindel scooped Elladan up in his strong arms and rocked the Elfling.

 

Elladan cooed happily and closed his eyes, savoring the spinning sensation. Glorfindel chuckled, seeing Elrohir's little fingers tangled in his mother's silver hair. The scene breathed peace and happiness and made it easier for him to ask his questions. "My Lady, I encountered an Elf called Erestor today and he intrigues me."

 

Celebrían was surprised to hear that Erestor had shown himself to the warrior. "Did you by any chance surprise him?"

 

"I must confess I walked into your husband's office without knocking first and that was when I saw him. Or should I say that I saw his eyes? His features were hidden in the shadows of his hood."

 

"What do you wish to know, Glorfindel?" Celebrían didn't feel the guilt her husband did and her opinion as how to deal with the Advisor also differed from Elrond's.

 

"Why have I not heard his name before? I asked about a dozen Elves today and no one knew who I was talking about. Yet, your husband says that Erestor is his friend and Advisor. How can it be that no one knows this?"

 

Celebrían helped Elrohir to gain a more comfortable position now that the Elfling wanted to go to sleep and used that time to carefully consider her answer. "Because Erestor wishes it that way."

 

"Why?" Glorfindel rocked a sleeping Elladan and gave Celebrían a pleading look.

 

"Because Erestor… Erestor has his reasons, Glorfindel. Are you really willing to venture into darkness so black and devouring that you might never be the same again once you tasted it? Are you willing to experience immense pain and suffering?"

 

Her words only made him more curious. "Will you tell me what happened to Erestor, then?"

 

She shook her head. "It is not my place to tell you." She studied him. "Glorfindel, can you be patient if you need to be?"

 

"Yes, my Lady." Glorfindel felt frustrated now that she was keeping information from him. She obviously knew a lot more than she was divulging to him!

 

"Then listen to me, Glorfindel of Imladris. It will not be long before the day will come that my husband and I will travel to the Golden Wood to visit my parents. When that time comes, I promise that you will find out why Erestor is such a recluse." Her expression hardened and then she added, "But if you fail him then you will seal Erestor's fate, Glorfindel. If you falter, if you desert him, you will bring him death. Do you understand?"

Glorfindel, feeling rather nervous, nodded his head once. "I understand duty and responsibility, my Lady. I will not fail you."

 

"I am not talking about duty and responsibility, Glorfindel, and it will not be me you will fail, son of gold and fire. You will fail Erestor and your failure will bring him death. Are you still eager to meet with Erestor? To learn his history?"

 

"Your words make my heart heavy with worry," Glorfindel admitted. "But he intrigues me."

 

"You did not answer my question, Glorfindel. You will either bring life or death to Erestor. Are you willing to take such a risk?"

 

"I am…" Glorfindel had no idea what he was agreeing to, but he had always accepted challenges when they were cast his way. "When that day comes, I will be ready."

 

"For Erestor's sake, I hope that you will not fail him, Glorfindel. My heart would not bear it." Celebrían gently caressed Elrohir's face and couldn't help but think of Erestor's scarred one.

 

Yes, her vision had been true, then. While her mother needed to look into her mirror to foresee the future, Celebrían's visions came natural to her and she had seen Glorfindel, bathed in warm sunlight, chasing away pain and darkness… But that future would only come to pass if Glorfindel remained steadfast. /Please Elbereth, do not allow Glorfindel to fail, for if he falters, Erestor will die./

 

~~~

 

Finding out more about Erestor and the location of the mysterious Elf's rooms had become Glorfindel's current mission. As he was accustomed to bringing his missions to a successful end, he took this undertaking very serious. He began to gather information about Erestor and realized very quickly that Imladris' inhabitants knew something about Erestor, but refused to tell him. Whenever he asked them questions about Erestor, they would turn quiet and ignore him. The mystery that surrounded Erestor grew and continued to draw him in.

 

Now that the inhabitants of Imladris proved useless, Glorfindel began to stalk the mysterious Advisor. Observing and following Erestor about was a lot harder than he had thought, but he managed to find out more details about Erestor. The mysterious Elf's world seemed to exist of Elrond's study, his own study situated next to the half-Elf's, and his private rooms located in the family wing.

 

Following Erestor about without being noticed took most of his stealth and cunning. Glorfindel regularly snuck down the corridor, following Erestor and Elrond, but he was never close enough to hear their words.

 

Elrond usually stayed with Erestor for one hour each evening. Upon leaving Erestor's rooms, the half-Elf always looked troubled and a haunted expression shone from the grey eyes.

 

Now that Glorfindel had gathered some basic information, he felt it was time to take the next step – to introduce himself to Erestor and to become a part of the Advisor's life.

 

Glorfindel often thought back to Celebrían's words and the warning they had held. He knew that this wasn't a game – this was serious.

 

~~~

 

"Erestor? What do you think? Should I maintain the larger number of patrols or should I reduce them? It has been weeks since they sighted any Orcs." Elrond studied Glorfindel's latest report.

 

"If I were you I would maintain them and certainly not reduce them. They might be biding their time." Gloved fingers reached for a cup filled with cool tea. Elrond brewed this concoction especially for him and the half-Elf let it cool down before serving it. This tea was one of Erestor's little joys in life and he even managed a smile as he felt the cooling substance slide down his throat. "You added a new flavor."

 

"Yes, lemon." Elrond smiled, pleased that Erestor's senses of smell and taste were still intact. "Do you like it?"

 

"I do." Erestor had closed his eyes and now opened them again. Looking through the window, he caught red splashes of sun set behind the glass. The red mingled with yellow and took on a golden hue which reminded him of Glorfindel's hair. /Bah, I need to stop thinking of Glorfindel!/

 

Glorfindel had been in Imladris for a year now. Elrond had actually announced that there would be a feast to celebrate that anniversary and that feast would take place in exactly one week. It was a feast he wouldn't attend – Erestor no longer attended celebrations.

 

But it hadn't always been that way. Until three years ago – when that dreadful attack had happened – he had been a happy Elf, enjoying making merry as the next Elf. But everything had changed after that raid.

 

"Erestor?" Elrond caught the distant expression in the dark eyes and rose from behind his desk. He made his way over to where Erestor was seated and pulled another comfortable chair closer so he could seat himself opposite his friend. "What are you thinking of?"

 

"I was thinking how quickly the last year must have passed by for Glorfindel. He has been here now for one year and he has become a part of Imladris." Erestor bit back a pain-filled groan as he shifted on the chair. The small movement caused him pain and he grew motionless, keeping the cup in place in mid-air.

 

"Glorfindel has proven himself to be a fine addition to Imladris. He performs his duties admirably, has made a great number of friends, and my sons are growing more fond of him with each passing day. He is a joy to have around, although…" Elrond paused to draw Erestor's attention and proceeded once he had it, "Although he can be a bit stubborn."

 

"Does he still call you 'Lord'?

 

"No, he has finally stopped doing that." Elrond's fingers reached for a wayward strand of his hair and he pushed it back behind an ear. "He has been asking about you, Erestor."

 

Erestor's dark eyes fastened on Elrond. "I trust you have not been encouraging him?" He couldn't put it past Elrond that the half-Elf would stimulate Glorfindel to find out more about him.

 

"Not to my knowledge, but Glorfindel can be stubborn." Privately Elrond was pleased that Glorfindel wasn't giving up on finding out more about Erestor. He didn't know if Erestor had noticed that they were followed when he escorted his Advisor to his rooms. If Erestor was still unaware of that fact, he wasn't going to inform him. His instincts told him that it would be a good thing if Glorfindel managed to befriend Erestor. It was a pity that his old friend didn't want to interact with Glorfindel as Elrond was convinced that Erestor would benefit from the contact.

 

Erestor sipped his cold tea and probed Elrond's eyes. Something in those grey eyes made him suspicious. But no, Elrond couldn't know that his dark eyes followed Glorfindel whenever he had the chance to watch the Captain. Glorfindel was beautiful to behold and many Elves had tried courting the warrior. Erestor had observed many clumsy attempts – although some Elves had done well trying to seduce Glorfindel – but Erestor had always witnessed the same reaction on Glorfindel's part. The warrior always acted flattered, but had never taken an Elf up on his offer to woo him.

 

Some time during this last year he had lost his heart to Glorfindel. Maybe he was in love with an illusion – the illusion of beauty and perfection which Glorfindel presented to him. /How can I be in love with him when I do not even know him?/ But thinking of Glorfindel, that long, golden hair and the sapphire eyes, made his life just a little more bearable, especially at night when the nightmares tried to sneak up on him.

 

"Erestor? Did your thoughts drift off again?" Elrond wondered if they had drifted off to Glorfindel. If so, he would try harder to convince Erestor to allow Glorfindel into his life.

 

"I apologize," Erestor mumbled. During his daydreams he had briefly forgotten about the pain he was in. "I…" Erestor stopped talking the moment the door opened. Unexpectedly, Glorfindel entered Elrond's study, carrying a tray which contained tea and cake. /What is he doing here?/ Erestor seldom had the pleasure of watching Glorfindel from this close and he drank in the golden sight.

 

"Elrond, I thought you might like some tea and…" Feigning surprise, Glorfindel's eyes widened. "My Lord Councilor…" He had known Erestor was here, but he would never admit that – that would only get him into trouble with Elrond. "Would you like some tea as well? I even brought cake." Glorfindel wished he could see past the shadows of Erestor's hood, but the other Elf's face remained hidden. /He is all eyes…/

 

Glorfindel resolutely approached the two Elves and placed the tray onto the table. "Oh, I see you already have tea, but that does not have to present a problem. You can have a slice of cake and I will drink a cup of tea with you!" Glorfindel poured himself a cup of steaming tea and sat down on the window sill. He chose that spot on purpose as it was closest to Erestor.

 

"I should go now." Erestor couldn't take the risk that Glorfindel would find out more about him. His safety – his self-preservation – lay in his isolation. He didn't want anyone's pity – it was bad enough that Elrond looked at him in *that* way.

 

"No, please stay." Glorfindel rested his hand atop of Erestor in an attempt to stop the Advisor from leaving. The fabric of the gloves beneath his fingertips felt odd and he wondered why Erestor wore them in the first place. Feeling Erestor shiver beneath his touch, he raised his eyes and tried to read the emotion in Erestor's dark ones. Pain… He saw pain there – raw, physical pain… but why? His touch was light and gentle and couldn't bring Erestor pain. Yet, he removed his hand. "I apologize if I…"

 

"It is not your fault," stammered Erestor, still reeling from the pain Glorfindel's touch had brought. The blond Elf couldn't know that he had rested his hand on a large cut which bled regularly and the blood had started to flow right now. That light touch had been enough to damage the fragile skin trying to form atop the damaged flesh.

 

Glorfindel put down his cup and ignored Elrond, who was trying to tell him to leave. He locked the half-Elf's words out and completely focused on Erestor. Except for the pained look in those dark eyes something else caught his attention as well. He smelled blood. "Are you hurt? Is there anything I can do?"

 

"You can leave me alone, Captain. I do not desire your company." Erestor pushed himself to his feet, trying to hide the pain and fatigue that coursed through him, and took a step toward the doorway with the intention to put more distance between them. But, he swayed and, as Glorfindel was the one closest to him, the warrior reached out to steady him. Erestor flinched, pulled away from Glorfindel, and closed his eyes in an attempt to fight down the overwhelming pain – and longing – that coursed through his veins.

 

"Do not touch me!" Erestor hissed the words and moved closer to the doorway. Placing his gloved hand on the door handle, his gaze traveled from Glorfindel to Elrond. He simply couldn't bear seeing the pity in those azure eyes. "I will retire now."

 

Elrond nodded his head once. "I will visit with you later." First he intended to lecture Glorfindel.

 

Erestor closed the door behind him and released a strangled yelp. Glorfindel was compassionate, beautiful, and willing to reach out to him and those three qualities were the reasons why he had to avoid the golden-haired Elf. It was bad enough that he cared for Glorfindel, that he found the warrior beautiful and tempting… He couldn't risk losing his heart to the Captain.

 

~~~

 

"I did not mean to hurt him. I do not understand any of this, Elrond. Why is he in pain? And why do I smell blood on him?"

 

Elrond's resolve to lecture Glorfindel and to put the fear of the Valar into the warrior deflated as he saw the caring expression in those eyes. "Glorfindel, you should not have done that. You should not have come here, and you should not be asking me these questions."

 

"But I *am* asking them! And I implore you to answer them!" Glorfindel's gaze fastened on the armrest padded with green velvet. He cried out as he saw the fresh stain on them. "That is where his hand rested. That is blood! Elrond, why does he wear gloves?" The thought crossed his mind that Erestor might be injured, but no wounds would hamper an Elf for so long. Those injuries should have healed these last few weeks!

 

Elrond really didn't want to do this, but the expression in Glorfindel's eyes convinced him that he had to. "Seat yourself, Glorfindel."

 

Glorfindel sat down on the chair Erestor had vacated and continued to stare at the stain. "Elrond, I need answers."

 

"I will give you some of them, but not all. Some things are not mine to tell. Only Erestor has the right to decide if he wants you to know or not." Elrond knew he would be walking a thin line, trying not to reveal too much, but at the same time he did think that Glorfindel was entitled to some answers.

 

"Why are you willing to tell me now? The last time I asked you about Erestor you refused to tell me anything!" Why had Elrond changed his mind?

 

Elrond sighed before answering Glorfindel's question. "Some has to do with the fact that my wife told me about your visit to the nursery weeks ago. You were trying to weasel information out of her, Glorfindel."

 

Glorfindel cocked his head. "Weasel it out of her? Elrond, I asked her – politely."

 

Elrond shook his head and waved the comment away. "At any rate, she and I talked and she convinced me that it might be a good thing if Erestor had more friends."

 

"More friends? Does he have any friends except for you, Elrond?" Now that some of his questions were about to be answered Glorfindel shifted impatiently on his chair.

 

"Erestor once had a large number of friends – of confidantes – but that has changed."

 

Glorfindel nodded, energetically. "I gathered as much. The Elves here all know Erestor and speak his name with a great deal of respect, but they refuse to share any information about him. Why is that?"

 

Elrond nibbled on his bottom lip, hoping he was doing the right thing for Erestor's sake. "Things changed three years ago. The twins had just been born and I was ecstatic that I had become a father. I did not want to part from my family and asked Erestor to travel to Mirkwood in my stead to negotiate with King Thranduil. It was a routine meeting and I expected him to return to Imladris within two months."

 

Glorfindel eagerly leaned in closer. "What happened?"

 

"Erestor never made it to Mirkwood. His escort encountered a large pack of Orcs and the vile monsters slaughtered the guards. Only Erestor found his way back here." Elrond's nervousness was increasing – he couldn't believe he was actually telling Glorfindel the truth. /Celebrían, I hope your visions are true and that we are doing the right thing./ He had never doubted his wife's instincts before and now he put his faith in her ability to foresee the future. She had told him that Glorfindel would play an important part in Erestor's life and Elrond was determined to do whatever was necessary to see his old friend's quality of life improve.

 

Glorfindel frowned. "Normally a pack of Orcs presents no real danger to a group of Elves."

 

"Normally no, but I had dismissed Erestor's advice. You see, he warned me that the roads were not safe and he wanted a bigger escort. I disagreed. I thought that ten guards would keep him safe." Elrond bowed his head. "It is my fault that they were murdered."

 

Glorfindel's face contorted in understanding. "The Orcs killed them, Elrond, you did not."

 

"I know that, Glorfindel, but this would never have happened if I had listened to Erestor. His advice is sound, my friend, and you would do well to listen if he ever offers you his counsel. Trust me, I learned that the hard way."

"But that does not explain why he reeks of blood, Elrond." The fact that only Erestor had made it back to Imladris intrigued him and Glorfindel sensed that Elrond was keeping back. "Why did they allow him to live? Or did he escape before they could end his life?"

 

Elrond grew uneasy now that they had reached *that* part of the story. "They tortured him, Glorfindel. They whipped him into submission and did not stop until he lost consciousness. As far as I can tell they flailed the hide right off of him, leaving raw meat on several parts of his body. His arms, hands, and back are damaged the most. They slashed his face, Glorfindel. That is why he hides inside his hood."

 

Glorfindel stared at Elrond with big eyes. "And they let him go because he would serve as a warning."

 

"I suspect as much." Elrond recalled he had been sipping tea and poured more of the hot liquid into his cup. He sipped slowly, closed his eyes, and willed the tears to stay inside his eyes instead of leaving them. "They did unspeakable things to him." There was one other thing – one he couldn't voice and he hoped Glorfindel would never find out the horrid truth that Erestor had been also been raped.

 

"But why has he not healed then? If this happened three years ago…" Glorfindel probed Elrond's eyes, but the half-Elf quickly averted his gaze.

 

"Maybe the blades they used were poisoned. I do not know why his injuries do not heal, Glorfindel." That was a lie – he *did* know why Erestor's body had lost its healing ability. Any Elf who had been violated in the way Erestor had should have faded, but his Advisor lingered on. Erestor had lost his healing ability, but not his life. "The fact is that he suffers horrible pains, Glorfindel, and they never leave him alone."

 

Glorfindel stared into the swirling liquid in his cup. He had lost all appetite and the cake no longer held any appeal. "So that is why I smell blood on him."

 

Elrond took heart and drew his strength from his wife's assurance that Glorfindel *wanted* to be there for Erestor. "I have noticed you sneaking after us, Glorfindel."

 

Glorfindel offered Elrond an apologetic smile. "I needed to find out more about him."

 

"I understand that." Elrond sipped again, using the moment to consider his next words. "You know that I visit him every evening."

 

"For about one hour, yes. Then you join your family." Glorfindel placed the cup aside and gave Elrond a curious look. "Why?"

 

"I am a healer, Glorfindel, and Erestor needs someone to attend to his wounds. He can not apply the balm himself or renew the bandages. His fingers… his hands… they are a mess. He depends on me to look after his injuries."

 

A lump of emotions had formed in Glorfindel's throat and he swallowed hard trying to rid himself of them. "And yet he still serves you in the capacity of an Advisor."

 

Elrond blinked, surprised to hear Glorfindel say that. "Of course. He is my friend and he *is* also very wise, Glorfindel. He is the best Advisor I could wish for."

 

"But those injuries must exhaust him." The idea of living with constant pain for years made Glorfindel nauseous. He had experienced a great deal of pain when that Balrog had ended his life, but his death had been quick. Erestor's fate seemed so much worse.

 

"They do. That is why he retires early most of the days, but you already know that as you have been following us around." Elrond felt relieved now that he had shared his dark secret with Glorfindel. It felt like a heavy burden had been lifted from his shoulders. "Celebrían and I believe that Erestor would benefit from forming a friendship with you. That is why I told you. I also think that the two of you should learn to know each other. You were right when you told me that there might come a day when I am not present and that you will have to confer with Erestor instead."

 

"You are encouraging me?" That surprised Glorfindel!

 

"The Valar help me, but I think I am doing just that." Elrond met Glorfindel's inquiring gaze and added, "You will have to be extremely careful when you approach Erestor. He does not want to befriend you and claims he prefers solitude."

 

"You do not believe him?"

 

"I remember the Elf he used to be before the attack. Glorfindel, he was so different back then. His inner light shone so brightly!"

 

A deep frown appeared on Glorfindel's brow. "This will take time. Erestor will fight me."

 

Elrond nodded, emphatically. "But you can not allow him to win, Glorfindel. He has spent these last three years in isolation and agony. If you can lessen some of his pain, please do so. I will support you and so will my wife."

 

/Celebrían had a hand in convincing Elrond to tell me./ Glorfindel recalled her words and realized that part of his destiny lay with Erestor. He had promised Celebrían that he wouldn't fail Erestor and now it was up to him to prove his words were true.

 

~~~

 

"Do you think that Erestor will accept my presence?" Glorfindel felt excited as well as nervous. At Elrond's request, he carried the tray that held Erestor's dinner. Glorfindel had been stunned to see that all Erestor required for his evening meal was a bowl of soup and some bread. The only luxury the Advisor seemed to allow himself was a glass of miruvor, which stood next to the bread.

 

"Oh, he will fight us every step of the way." Elrond gave Glorfindel a conspiring look. Having Glorfindel at his side to call upon should Erestor fight him encouraged him and he was determined not to back down. Erestor wouldn't win the fight this time. "Do not let his rage intimidate you. Most of it is pretense, meant to keep you at a distance. He is afraid that you will only feel pity for him."

 

"I will teach him the difference between pity and compassion, then," Glorfindel stated, confidently.

 

Elrond arched an eyebrow. "You would be the first to teach him something in a very long time, Glorfindel." But the Captain's words gave him new hope. He had grown weary while he had tended to Erestor during these last three years. Maybe Glorfindel was just what Erestor needed – someone unprejudiced and not burdened with guilt. "Stand your ground, Glorfindel."

 

"You make it sound like we are about to face Morgoth, Elrond." Glorfindel chuckled.

 

"Oh, Erestor can be just as intimidating as the Evil One. Never underestimate him!" Elrond knocked on the door to Erestor's rooms and drew in a deep breath. Yes, he did feel like he was about to venture into Mount Doom with Sauron's sword hanging over his head. Erestor's reaction at finding Glorfindel present as well wouldn't be pretty.

 

Glorfindel still believed that Elrond was exaggerating. How dangerous could an injured Elf be? But that thought exactly made him reconsider. /Very dangerous./

 

"You may enter, Elrond." Erestor had longed for Elrond to finally visit with him. His injuries hurt more than usual and he needed the half-Elf to apply the balm and renew the bandages. Until the knock on his door had come, he had been daydreaming about Glorfindel – about the way that the golden hair danced against the small of the Elf's back and the way those eyes glistered with life.

 

Elrond involuntarily held his breath as he stepped into Erestor's rooms. Mentally he prepared himself for the verbal lashing that would follow. "I brought a friend tonight."

 

Erestor's eyes narrowed and revealed his anger. "How could you do this to me?" He had told Elrond three years ago that he didn't want anyone to visit him in his rooms, no one save for the half-Elf himself. Celebrían had been included later, but only reluctantly. She had been adamant about visiting him and he had relented in the end. But that didn't mean he wanted Glorfindel here as well. Especially not when Elrond would tend to his injuries.

 

/Aiya, my hood…/ He had pushed his hood back upon entering his rooms and his face was exposed now, exposed to Glorfindel's shocked eyes. Erestor wanted to pull the hood back into place, but his fingers hurt too much to move. "Go away," he ordered, addressing Glorfindel in a much weaker voice than he had hoped for.

 

"Glorfindel is staying, Erestor." Elrond closed the door behind them and then looked at Glorfindel, feeling sympathy for the fair-haired Elf who stared at Erestor in obvious distress. Over the years, he had become somewhat used to Erestor's appearance, but he understood that the horrible disfigurement would upset Glorfindel. "Glorfindel, place that tray on the table next to Erestor and then sit down on the window sill."

 

Glorfindel did as he was told, but all the while, he kept staring at Erestor's marred face. If he looked closely enough he could see the form of the blade that had cut open Erestor's face. One scar stemmed from a whip and Glorfindel's stomach did an appalled somersault. The warrior forced down the nausea, unwilling to run out of the room in order to throw up. Instead, he concentrated on the long raven hair, which looked soft to the touch – like spun silk.

 

Recalling Elrond's instructions, Glorfindel removed himself from the situation and sat down on the window sill. Although he was still close enough to watch the two other Elves, he was far enough away from Erestor to make the raven-haired Elf forget that he was being watched. /The pain he must be in! By Elbereth, how does he endure such agony? And he has been in that pain for three long years!/

 

"Elrond, I told you…" Erestor prepared to lecture Elrond, but then the half-Elf sat down, uncovered the balm and the bandages, and began to peel off his gloves. The maid would collect them tomorrow and a clean pair already waited for him on his desk. The soothing balm eased the burning of his skin and Erestor closed his eyes. Tears pushed against his eyelids. /Do you not understand, Elrond, that I do not want Glorfindel to see me like this?/ It was bad enough when a maid or someone else saw him sneak through the corridors, but it was even worse now that it was Glorfindel who was watching him – the Elf he was in love with. "Why did you have to bring him here?"

 

Elrond concentrated on cleaning the cuts and soothing the raw skin. He heard Glorfindel suck in his breath, but ignored his Captain's reaction for now. "I told you before that you need more friends. And then there is the possibility of me leaving Imladris one day. Should that ever happen then Glorfindel and you will have to work together."

 

Erestor reluctantly opened his eyes. He knew what was to come, but didn't want to bare his shame to Glorfindel. "Tell him to leave the room."

 

But Elrond determinedly shook his head. "Glorfindel stays."

 

Glorfindel was about to remark that 'he' was still present when his lips began to tremble. Elrond was helping Erestor out of his robes, and this time, his stomach rebelled more urgently at seeing the raw, bleeding skin which had been hidden beneath the robes. "By the Valar…" Erestor looked up sharply, and if glares could kill, Glorfindel would have been dead by now. "How do you bear it?"

 

Erestor hated Elrond for bringing Glorfindel here. Why couldn't the half-Elf leave the remnants of his pride intact? Why did he have to show Glorfindel the extent of his injuries? He felt humiliated, even degraded. "I will tend to my injuries tonight. I do not require your services, Elrond Half-Elven."

 

Elrond had been expecting this outburst and paid it little attention. Instead, he replied, "Glorfindel, would you go into the bathroom and collect his morning robe?"

 

Glorfindel pushed himself to his feet, entered the bathroom, and lingered there longer than was strictly necessary. He knew why Elrond had sent him in here – he needed a moment to compose himself. Erestor's injuries were much worse than he had expected and he understood why the Advisor didn't want him to see him in this way. But Elrond's way was the right way. Glorfindel nodded his head. Celebrían had hinted that his path would be hard and difficult and he began to realize how just great the challenge was that he had embraced. Erestor would fight him every step of the way – would not trust him and do his best to chase him away. /He will not succeed in doing that… He will not!/

 

~~~

 

By the time Glorfindel finally emerged from the bathroom Elrond had tended to most of Erestor's injuries. The Advisor's arms, back, buttocks, and even more private parts had been soothed with cooling ointment and all he had left to do were the hands. "Glorfindel, pull up a chair and sit down beside me. You should learn how to do this."

Elrond's order took both Elves aback. Erestor reacted first and hissed in anger at the half-Elf, "What do you think you are doing? I told him not to touch me and you… you…" But suddenly Glorfindel sat opposite him and those large, blue eyes stared pleadingly at him. Had he still been capable of blushing, he would have.

 

"Erestor? I will not touch you if you do not want that, but… I pray you will. Someone should be able to care for you if Elrond is unavailable." Glorfindel hoped Erestor would decide to trust him just a little.

 

Erestor appreciated the fact that Glorfindel gave him a choice; it made him a bit more willing to *really* listen to what Elrond had been saying. What the half-Elf had said was true – there had been times when the healer had been unable to visit him and he had suffered even more without Elrond tending to his wounds. Celebrían had offered to take her husband's place, but he had declined, unable to bear her touch. He hadn't wanted her to feel traumatized. But this was Glorfindel offering to take care of him, a seasoned warrior who had seen his share of injuries.

 

"Erestor, be honest with yourself. It would be a good thing if Glorfindel knew how to do this. Instead of one person who can look after you, you would have two." Like Glorfindel, Elrond prayed that Erestor would accept. "And is the thought of having Glorfindel's company truly such an appalling concept? You would have someone else to talk to and to beat at chess."

 

"Erestor, will you honor me with your trust?" Glorfindel reached for the balm, dipped his fingers in the ointment, and reached for Erestor's hand. However, he didn't touch the Advisor yet, suspecting it was important that Erestor made the decision to put his hand in his. Glorfindel's heart thundered in his chest as he awaited Erestor's decision.

 

Erestor's hand shook as he placed it in Glorfindel's. It was his longing, his insane hope for love and friendship that made him reach out to the golden-haired warrior. He didn't speak; he didn't trust his voice to cooperate.

 

But Glorfindel and Elrond recognized the gesture for what it was. The half-Elf released the breath he had been holding and gave Erestor an approving smile. /You did well, my friend./

 

Glorfindel carefully smoothed the ointment onto the raw skin and kept himself from flinching, knowing he was unwillingly adding to Erestor's discomfort. /I will not let you down,/ he promised. /I will not fail you./

 

All Erestor was capable of was staring at Glorfindel in an adoring way. The golden-haired Elf's touch was caring and gentle and he thought he saw compassion in the blue eyes instead of the pity which he had been afraid to see. Yes, maybe he would allow Glorfindel to befriend him. Although he had only been in Glorfindel's company for a few minutes, the other Elf's touch seemed to lessen his anguish. Glorfindel's touch brought him peace of mind and even a sense of joy, something he hadn't felt in three, long years.

 

Glorfindel saw the beginning of trust in the dark eyes and smiled at Erestor. They had set their first step on the road of friendship.

~~~

 

Elrond rose from his chair and that was his way to announce that he was to rejoin his family. Erestor nodded his head once, saying goodbye for the night without the use of words. Elrond's heart felt burdened, as he knew that Erestor wouldn't receive any sleep that night. His friend hadn't slept in years. "I will visit you again tomorrow." It was always the same daily routine they went through.

 

"I will be here." Erestor remained seated instead of showing Elrond out. The half-Elf didn't need his guidance and moving about just hurt Erestor too much.

 

Glorfindel saw Elrond cock his head in what resembled an invitation to join the half-Elf. /But it is still early and what else will Erestor do this eve?/ Something told him to protest Elrond's beckoning. "I think I will stay a little longer, that is, if you are not too tired, Erestor?"

 

Now that something out of the ordinary was happening, Erestor felt at a loss. He had expected Glorfindel to leave with Elrond – that the golden-haired Elf wanted to stay surprised him.

 

Elrond wiggled an eyebrow. "Whatever you do, Glorfindel, do not challenge Erestor to a game of chess. He will utterly crush you." That was his way of telling Glorfindel what might convince Erestor to allow him to stay.

 

"Chess? Oh, I mastered that game a long time ago. Where do you keep the board, Erestor?" Seeing the dazed expression in Erestor's eyes, Glorfindel knew he had completely surprised the Advisor. /Just as I intended./ He wasn't going to give Erestor a chance to throw him out of his rooms! "Elrond, do you know where he keeps it?"

 

Amused, Elrond pointed at the top shelf of Erestor's bookcase. "Try over there."

 

Erestor watched Glorfindel uncover the board and the chess pieces. The warrior even blew the dust away and chuckled at him. /What does he think he is doing?/ The Valar help him, but it didn't look like Glorfindel would be leaving any time soon!

 

"Elrond, as you are on your way out would you ask one of the servants to bring wine and some sweet treats? I am determined to win at least one game tonight." Glorfindel pushed a table in between Erestor and himself and began setting up the board. "Be on your way now, Elrond. I am thirsty." One look from the corner of his eye told him that Erestor hadn't touched his soup yet. "Are you not going to eat that?"

 

"I…" It didn't happen very often that Erestor was at a loss for words and he caught Elrond's amused smirk at seeing him speechless.

 

"I will tell the cook to send up more food." Elrond quickly closed the door to Erestor's rooms behind him. He was happy to have survived that visit – Erestor could be vicious when he felt cornered. But everything had gone well, even better than he had hoped, and he decided to put his faith in Glorfindel. Maybe the warrior's carefree attitude was just what Erestor needed.

 

~~~

 

"What are you doing?" The question accidentally escaped Erestor. He had never intended to voice it aloud.

 

Glorfindel knew exactly what Erestor was asking, but he refused to give in. "I am about to challenge you to a game of chess… That is what I am doing." He gave Erestor another dazzling smile and waited for the dark-haired Elf to either accept his challenge or lash out at him. Much depended on Erestor's reaction.

 

Erestor's eyes took on a sad expression. "Moving the pieces about tires me, Glorfindel. As you know by now, moving my hands causes me pain." To his surprise, he found that he wanted to play, but the prospect of having to move the pieces made him weary.

 

"Then I will move them for you." Glorfindel had finished putting up the pieces and turned the board so Erestor would play with the white pieces. "Or am I imposing? Did you have plans for tonight?" He didn't believe that – Erestor never left his rooms after Elrond had left. He had learned that much when he had observed the half-Elf and the Advisor. "I merely want to spend time with you so I can get to know you, Erestor."

 

"I know that," Erestor whispered, feeling bone-weary. "But what do you think you will gain by staying here, Glorfindel?"

 

"Your friendship," Glorfindel replied, steadfast.

 

"My friendship…" Erestor blinked at hearing those words. How was he supposed to make Glorfindel understand that he belonged to the dead and not to the living? Glorfindel's life was not like his.

 

A servant knocked on the door and announced he brought refreshments. Seeing the sudden unease in Erestor's eyes, Glorfindel rose from his chair and headed toward the door. He opened it partly, took hold of the tray, and then thanked and dismissed the servant.

 

Erestor felt relieved now that the servant wouldn't be entering his rooms. He didn't like the effect he had on strangers – they stared at him and then quickly left, unable to bear his presence for a longer period of time. That Glorfindel wanted to stay still stunned him.

 

"That soup has turned cold by now." Glorfindel smiled, seeing Elrond had told the cook to add another bowl of this time still hot soup and more bread. "You should eat, Erestor." He placed the soup on the table next to the board and then averted his eyes. Erestor probably felt self-conscious and Glorfindel didn't want to add to the injured Elf's unease.

 

Feeling hungry, Erestor managed to pick up the bread which he soaked in the soup, causing it to soften further. With much difficulty, he raised his hand and pushed the dripping bread past his lips, chewing slowly. There was a reason why he only ate soft foods – his throat hurt too much.

 

"Why are you doing this, Glorfindel?" Erestor drew in a deep breath and wondered what he was supposed to do with Glorfindel. Why was the blond Elf acting in this way?

 

"I already told you – I want to know you." Glorfindel arched an eyebrow. "Are you going to tell me which piece to move?"

 

Erestor gave in and told the warrior what his first move would be. Glorfindel moved the piece and Erestor continued to study the golden-haired Elf. The light that shone from those azure eyes mesmerized him and he felt entranced, staring into those pools of blue.

 

"Are you daydreaming, Erestor?" Glorfindel chuckled and smiled at the Advisor. "Anyone I know?" This verbal banter was hopefully a way to bridge the distance between them.

 

Erestor managed a weak smile and ignored the stinging sensation the movement caused to his facial skin. It had been three years since anyone had talked to him in such a forward way and he *had* missed it. "Maybe," he deadpanned.

 

Glorfindel was delighted to hear Erestor return the teasing. "Be quiet now, I have to think about my move."

 

Erestor would have chuckled if that movement wouldn't have caused him more discomfort. Glorfindel was a refreshing wind in his life and it appeared the blond Elf was determined to stay.

 

~~~

 

Two hours later, Glorfindel finally admitted defeat. Erestor was a master at the game and had beaten him four times in a row. "I will become better at this game!" Feigning annoyance, he crossed his arms in front of his chest and stared at Erestor. The dark eyes, normally so haunted, now showed a spark of amusement and the lips were lightly curved in a smile. Erestor obviously enjoyed his company.

 

"The next time we play I will let you win." Erestor hadn't felt this contented for a long time. Glorfindel's presence was a soothing balm and eased his troubled mind. "Thank you for a lovely evening," Erestor said, assuming Glorfindel's words served to announce his departure.

 

"Do you want me to leave then?" Glorfindel cocked his head and studied Erestor. He didn't believe that the raven-haired Elf wanted him to go away. "I want to stay a little longer – if I may."

 

"And do what, Glorfindel?" Erestor felt tired and his eyes began to close. Although Elves slept with their eyes open, he was so tired that should he doze off, he would fall into a deep, healing sleep. But he was afraid to go to sleep as the nightmares were only waiting to sneak up on him.

 

"I do not know, Erestor. How do you spend your evenings?" The fact that Erestor averted his eyes alerted him that something was wrong.

 

Erestor didn't know why he answered truthfully when he had wanted to lie. "I curl up on my bed and wait for the morning."

 

Erestor's honesty surprised Glorfindel and he felt honored that the injured Elf trusted him that much. "You do not sleep?"

 

"I am afraid to go to sleep," Erestor admitted in a trembling voice. "After the attack Elrond gave me a sleeping potion so I would rest and horrible nightmares haunted my sleep. I have not slept since." Why was he confiding in Glorfindel? What was it about the warrior that made him want to trust him?

 

"You have not slept in three years?" Glorfindel was shocked.

 

"That is correct. I stay awake." Erestor let his long hair fall in front of his face. He felt vulnerable all of a sudden, although he didn't understand why.

 

Glorfindel leaned back against the comfort of his chair and considered what he had just learned. /Erestor is not sleeping and not healing. Sleep is a premise for injuries as severe as his to heal. I wonder if he will improve, should he begin to sleep regularly. But how do I convince him to try?/

 

"You should go now, Glorfindel. It is late and I know that you must rise early to train with your guards. I will be fine." Erestor almost choked on those last four words.

 

Glorfindel opted for an honest approach. "No, you will not be fine. Erestor, I want to propose something to you." He leaned in closer and raised a hand to push the ebony hair away from Erestor's face. Erestor didn't flinch away from the touch and Glorfindel said, "I really believe that you should try to sleep, Erestor. Sleep will aid your healing ability."

 

"My healing ability is gone," Erestor replied in a moment of complete honesty. "It does not matter if I sleep or not."

 

Glorfindel frowned at hearing that. Why would Erestor's healing ability be gone? The only cases he had heard of in which Elves had lost their healing ability were those of the ones who had been raped. /Oh no, that can not be. Sweet Elbereth, I can not have reached the right conclusion. No, that can not be right. Erestor would be dead if he had been violated!/ But Erestor looked more dead than alive. /Did he somehow survive the violation? But how can that be? Námo would have been merciful and would have called Erestor to his Halls./ But what other conclusion could he reach?

 

None.

 

"Will you at least try to sleep?" Glorfindel wasn't going to give up that easily. He *was* convinced that sleep would set the healing process in motion – regardless of what Erestor said or thought.

 

"Glorfindel, I realize that you are trying to help, but…" Erestor felt so tired, so drained, so ready to give up his resistance and to surrender to Glorfindel… but could he? "Glorfindel, you do not know the details of what happened to me and I want to keep it that way. I do not want to relive that event."

 

Glorfindel shook his head. "You have not slept in three years and you wonder why you are not healing, Erestor? What do you have to lose?"

 

"Glorfindel, the nightmares…" Erestor wanted to go to sleep, but he was so afraid… so very afraid to be catapulted into the past. "Do not ask this of me."

 

"Erestor, I insist you sleep." Glorfindel had the suspicion that Erestor would instantly fall asleep once he ceased resisting sleep. "I will stay here with you and watch over you. I promise to wake you if the nightmares are upon you."

 

But Erestor shook his head. "I can not do that."

 

Glorfindel wished he could reach out and establish some sort of physical contact, but he didn't dare touch Erestor out of fear to increase the other Elf's pain. As he was unable to touch any of the raw skin, he curled a finger around a strand of Erestor's hair and gently tugged at it. "You *can* do that, Erestor. I believe in you."

 

"Do you not think I tried? Elrond offered to watch over my dreams, but…"

 

"You did not take him up on that offer, did you?" Glorfindel concentrated on Erestor's eyes and momentarily blocked out the horrid wounds. "Would you like that, Erestor? Would you not love to go to sleep and let the healing begin? I promise to wake you before the nightmares gain a hold on you. What do you have to lose? What?"

 

At a loss for words, Erestor merely stared into Glorfindel's eyes. /He is sincere. He wants to do this for me./ But the prospect of making himself so vulnerable scared him. "Glorfindel, I am afraid of the nightmares."

 

"I promise you that there will not be any nightmares. I will wake you up should they start to appear." Glorfindel rose from his chair and his first thought was to take Erestor's hands in his and to lead the other Elf to his bed. But then he realized that such a touch would only bring Erestor pain. "Please trust me," he pleaded as he raised his hands and offering them to Erestor palm up, trying to show his sincerity. "I only want to help."

 

"Glorfindel, this is a bad idea." But if it was a bad idea, then why was he pushing himself to his feet? He was deadly tired and the prospect of sleeping unnerved him. "Where are you going?" Watching Glorfindel, he found that the warrior came to a halt beside his bed.

 

"Why do you not lie down? Or is that too painful? How do you normally rest?" Even if Erestor didn't sleep, he had to rest and the raven-haired Elf had mentioned curling up on his side.

 

"On my side… Resting on my back is too painful." Erestor couldn't believe he was really doing this, but he was lying down on his side. He bit down the waves of pain that washed over him and concentrated on watching Glorfindel, who was in the middle of pulling a chair close to the bed.

 

"I will be right here – all night long – and I will wake you if you appear distressed in your sleep." Glorfindel's heart missed a beat at seeing the vulnerable expression in Erestor's eyes. "You can trust me. I will not fail you." The need and longing in those dark eyes had long touched his heart and he wanted nothing more than to see Erestor recover. "Sleep," he whispered once Erestor was resting as comfortably as possible on the bed. The smell of blood was still present and it told Glorfindel that some wounds must have reopened. "Sleep now, Erestor." Recalling a lullaby which his mother had sung when he had been an Elfling, he hummed the melody in the hope that it would ease Erestor's mind and lure him into sleep. /Stop fighting this./

 

And Erestor, who lacked the energy and the will power to continue fighting Glorfindel, gave in. He listened to the lullaby and, within minutes, his eyes closed and his breathing evened out. The healing sleep, which he had dreaded for the last three years, was finally upon him.

 

"Elrond should have forced you to sleep," Glorfindel whispered, but then reconsidered. "No, not force you, but he should have found a way to take away your fears." Gently, he caressed a strand of ebony hair and he marveled at its silken touch. "Sleep and heal, Erestor." He didn't delude himself into thinking that Erestor would be healed when the morning came, but he did hope that the Advisor would feel a little stronger after a good night's sleep.

 

~~~

 

"Sleep, Erestor. All is well. You are safe and there is no danger here." Glorfindel regularly soothed the dark-haired Elf, who moaned pitifully in his sleep. "I am here and will protect you. The nightmares will not gain a hold on you." Glorfindel kept up the calm mumbling and raised his hand to stroke the raven hair – which seemed the only safe place to touch, where Erestor didn't hurt. "You are not alone – not anymore."

 

His mumbling seemed to help and Erestor's sleep became peaceful again. Glorfindel's attention momentarily swayed as he heard the door open. One look told him that Elrond had returned. The half-Elf wore a stunned expression on his face.

 

"How did you convince him to go to sleep?" Elrond had spent the evening in the company of his wife and sons and had listened for Glorfindel leaving the corridor. But no footsteps had sounded in the corridor and, after Celebrían and the twins had gone to sleep, he had decided to visit with Erestor one more time. Nothing could have prepared him for the sight that greeted him – Erestor was asleep and Glorfindel sat on the side of the bed, mumbling and caressing the raven hair. "He always refused me."

 

"I did not give him a chance to refuse me." Glorfindel replied in a soft voice, unwilling to wake Erestor up. "It is a healing sleep, Elrond. He has closed his eyes."

 

"I always hoped that this would happen one day. I almost gave up hope though." Elrond smiled at the sleeping Erestor. "I hope he will sleep through the night without waking up."

 

"I will be here if he wakes up, but so far, he has given no indication of waking up any time soon. He is exhausted, Elrond."

 

"He must like you more than he wants us to know." Elrond considered his injured friend. "I will check on the two of you in the morning."

 

Glorfindel cocked his head. "I am not quite certain he will already be awake in the morning. If this is truly a healing sleep it might continue a little longer." At least he hoped so!

 

~~~

 

Morning came and Erestor remained asleep. Glorfindel had exchanged his place on the bedside for his chair, but remained ready to lean in closer if Erestor should suffer a nightmare, but so far, Erestor's fears hadn't come true. Yes, the Advisor had had a bad dream during the night, but that nightmare had only lasted a few seconds. His soothing mumbling had eased Erestor's mind and the raven-haired Elf's sleep had become calm again.

 

Now that Arien was rising, Glorfindel got his chance to study Erestor's scarred face in depth and he cringed as he saw the severity of the cuts that marred the face, which must have been handsome at one time.

 

"Glorfindel?" It was Celebrían and not Elrond who opened the door and entered the room. The Lady of Imladris was still dressed in her nightgown and her long, silver hair cascaded down her back. Ignoring the blush that surfaced on Glorfindel's face, she approached the bed. She sighed at the sight of a sleeping Erestor. "I am so happy that he finally gave in and is sleeping."

 

"My Lady, should you not be with your sons?"

 

"They can manage without me for a few minutes." Celebrían smiled. Her vision was quickly becoming true. She had known that Glorfindel would be instrumental to Erestor's recovery. "My husband asked me to inform you that you do not need to attend the training and that your second in command will take over. Elrond wants you to stay with Erestor today – regardless of the fact if he is awake or asleep."

 

Glorfindel nodded his head once. "I had hoped as much."

 

Celebrían cocked her head and studied the warrior. "Will you share your thoughts with me, Glorfindel?"

 

"I want to hold him. There is so much pain inside him and I can not take it away. It is beyond me how he managed to endure so far."

 

She nodded, emphatically. "I feel the same way, Glorfindel. Erestor did not want to let me in at first, but I persisted, and with Elrond's help, he accepted the fact that I am a part of his life." She intercepted Glorfindel's questioning look and knew what it was about. "His wounds do not appall me, Glorfindel. Neither do they make me flinch or want me to run out of this room. I know how much Erestor has suffered, and now you know as well."

 

Glorfindel gave Erestor another look to make certain that the raven-haired Elf was still asleep. "My Lady, how much do you know of the nature of Erestor's injuries?"

 

Celebrían gave Glorfindel a look filled with understanding. "Elrond did not want to confide in me at first, but I made him. Elrond feels guilty for what has happened to Erestor and my husband does not discuss this matter easily."

 

"Elrond told me that they whipped Erestor and I can see the other injuries they inflicted upon him, but one question remained unanswered." Glorfindel wasn't so sure he should be asking the Lady of Imladris such a distressing question, but he pushed on at any rate. "Erestor said that he lost his healing ability and as far as I know that only happens if an Elf has been…"

 

"Violated?" Elrond spoke the word softly. "Yes, he was raped, Glorfindel. You reached the correct conclusion."

 

Glorfindel probed Elrond's eyes and saw the guilt there. "It was not your fault."

 

"Oh, but it *was* my fault." Elrond approached the bed and came to a halt behind his wife. He wrapped his arms around her waist as he needed to feel her close to his. "It is my fault that he suffers, Glorfindel. I should have listened to him." Elrond closed his eyes in order to center himself. "Erestor says that he does not blame me. It would have been easy for him to do so, but Erestor…" Elrond's voice faltered.

 

Celebrían turned around in her husband's embrace and began to guide Elrond back to the doorway. "Stay with Erestor, Glorfindel. Should you need anything, please let us know." She comfortingly rubbed Elrond's lower back, trying to ease her husband's distress, but at the same time she was already thinking about the next step she had to take in order to guarantee that her vision came true. She had to find a way to make Elrond agree to the idea of visiting the Golden Wood without the twins accompanying them. She didn't want to leave her children behind either, but she knew that Elrohir and Elladan would play an important part in Erestor's recovery.

 

~~~

 

During the day, Glorfindel distracted himself by studying the items in Erestor's room. He found numerous scrolls, books, wood carvings, and even a sketch book. Unable to contain his curiosity, he opened the book to look at the drawings. He assumed Erestor had made them, as not a single drawing featured the Advisor. Instead, he encountered drawings which depicted the twins, Elrond, Celebrían, Lindir, the Last Homely House, and a sun set. Just when he was about to close the book a few loose pages floated onto the floor.

 

Curiously he picked them up, turned them around, and sucked in his breath. In his hands he held six pieces of paper – six drawings – and they all featured him: Glorfindel.

 

In the first drawing he was smiling and Erestor had perfectly matched the blue of his eyes. In the second drawing he looked thoughtful and the third and fourth showed him on the training grounds with a bare chest and a raised sword. Looking at the last two drawings, he found Erestor had drawn him in his sleep. /When did he watch me sleep?/ And his next, startling thought was, /Just how much pain did he suffer when drawing these?/

 

He tucked the sketch book back into place again and walked over to the window. He eased the drapes aside, opened the window, and breathed in the fresh air deeply. The smell of blood still lingered in Erestor's rooms and served to remind him of the Advisor's sorry state.

 

Turning around, he watched Erestor sleep. /I wonder how he will react when he finally wakes up again./ He had the feeling that the realization that he had slept throughout the night would stun Erestor.

 

~~~

 

Erestor didn't stir from his sleep until Arien had started her descent. Elrond was due to visit any moment now in order to attend to Erestor's wounds, but Glorfindel hoped that he would have a moment alone with Erestor before the half-Elf joined them. He wanted a moment in private once Erestor awoke. /I do not want to share Erestor with Elrond./ When did that happen?

 

Glorfindel scooted closer now that Erestor's eyelids trembled. He involuntarily held his breath as the eyes opened. Erestor blinked several times, trying to focus on his surroundings. "Did you sleep well?"

Erestor blinked again. He hadn't expected to find Glorfindel so close to him. Where was he and what had happened?

 

"You slept through the night and most of the day. You should feel a bit more rested."

 

"Did I really sleep that long?" Erestor stared at Glorfindel in surprise.

 

"Yes, you did." Glorfindel knelt beside the bed so he was level with Erestor and probed the hooded eyes. "Are you hungry? You must be thirsty. I will send for some refreshments. I suspect that Elrond will visit shortly to tend to your wounds."

 

"Did you really say that I slept that long?" He didn't recall having any nightmares during his sleep! How could that be?

 

"Yes, I did. Elrond took care of all pending matters and that allowed me to stay with you. I guarded your sleep, just as I promised." Glorfindel saw the exact moment realization dawned on Erestor. "Yes, Elrond managed without us."

 

Erestor began to push himself upright and stared blankly at Glorfindel. "And you stayed here all that time?"

 

"I promised to watch over you and I always keep my promises. But you did not answer my question, Erestor. How do you feel? Better?"

 

Erestor didn't know how he felt. He was still trying to accept the fact that he had slept undisturbed. "I was so afraid to go to sleep." Or was it because of Glorfindel that the nightmares had left him alone? "Thank you, Glorfindel. Thank you for making me go to sleep and for staying with me. You did not have to do that."

 

"I promised you that I would and I feel honored that you trusted me enough to go to sleep." Glorfindel wanted to wrap Erestor in a comforting embrace and cursed the fact that his touch would only bring the injured Elf pain. He was literally forced to keep his distance when he didn't want to. "You do seem a bit more rested, Erestor."

 

"I feel… different," Erestor mumbled, feeling confused. He felt better – only marginally – but better. Hungry even.

 

"I will be right back." Glorfindel rose from the floor and walked toward the doorway to instruct a servant to fetch food from the kitchen, but he also had a second reason to give Erestor some privacy – he had seen the confusion in those cloudy eyes. /He must be wondering why he slept so peacefully. He thought for so long that he would not be able to do so. He feared those nightmares for much too long./ And the sad thing was that if he hadn't interfered, Erestor would still be afraid of them. Then, the Advisor would have spent another night alone and in fear.

 

~~~

 

"I took the liberty to fetch some dinner." Elrond entered Erestor's room with a curious look on his face. Erestor's eyes were still clouded with the remnants of sleep and that told Elrond that his Advisor had only been awake for a short while. "Are you hungry?" Elrond placed the tray on the table and exchanged a curious look with Glorfindel. The warrior looked happy and confident.

 

"I am!" Glorfindel headed for the table and grabbed a slice of bread. "Erestor? Where do you wish to eat? Maybe on the balcony? Some fresh air would do you good."

 

But Erestor shook his head. "People can see me there. I prefer to stay indoors."

 

Glorfindel cocked his head and considered objecting to that decision, but then decided that it was too early to force Erestor to become a bit more sociable. "We will eat here, then."

 

"Before we eat… Elrond, I need your help to attend to the cuts." Erestor still felt perplexed; Glorfindel didn't seem to plan on leaving his quarters any time soon and the warrior was only making himself more comfortable by building a fire and pulling the chairs close to the fire place.

 

"Of course," Elrond replied. "What do you think of a bath, Erestor?" His friend had to frequently take baths in order to clean the cuts and soaking in the lukewarm water usually relaxed Erestor; it was obvious that Glorfindel's behavior unnerved Erestor. After seeing Erestor nod, Elrond said, "I will fill up the pool." The pool in the bathroom was big enough to hold two Elves and Elrond had joined Erestor on occasion when Erestor had felt extremely poorly.

 

Now that Elrond was in the bathroom, Glorfindel used the opportunity to walk up to Erestor. He sat on his heels in front of the injured Elf and gazed intently into the dark eyes. "Will you let me attend to you?"

 

"Why?" Glorfindel's request took Erestor aback. "You know how atrocious I look beneath these robes."

 

Glorfindel shook his head and gave Erestor a rueful look. "Have you not figured out by now that I intend to see you healed? I am not leaving before some improvement has set in."

 

Erestor felt exasperated. "And did you not listen to me when I said that I have lost my healing ability?" The moment Erestor spoke those words he realized that Glorfindel must have figured out just why he had lost it. Instead of seeing pity, only compassion and understanding looked back at him. "You know what happened to me."

 

Glorfindel nodded his head once. "I figured it out yes and Elrond merely confirmed my suspicions."

 

"You told him?" Erestor glared at Elrond who stood in the doorway and had overheard their conversation.

 

"I had to. I did not have much of a choice, Erestor." Elrond ignored the poisonous glare Erestor threw at him and busied himself with selecting robes and gloves. A servant regularly collected the garments to wash them and then replaced them. Elrond also gathered the soothing ointment and bandages. "I am ready when you are, Erestor."

 

"You did not answer my question," Glorfindel said. "Will you allow me to attend to you?"

 

Elrond was surprised to hear this and wondered just how big a part Glorfindel wanted to play in Erestor's life. He applauded the warrior's interest in Erestor. Erestor would only benefit from having another friend who cared about him. "I can show Glorfindel how to assist you during your bath."

 

Erestor closed his eyes and drew in a deep breath. He hated being dependant on them. He didn't want to be this weak -- this helpless!

 

"Let me help you to your feet." Glorfindel wanted to support Erestor, but then realized that there wasn't a place on the Advisor's body he could safely touch. In the end, he wrapped an arm around Erestor's shoulders. He noticed the distinct flinch and whispered an apology. "I am sorry. It is not my intention to add to your pain."

 

Erestor opened his eyes and met Glorfindel's probing gaze. "It cannot be helped." By leaning heavily on the warrior, he indicated that he accepted the help and the warrior's offer to look after him. Reason had prevailed, telling him that it would be for the best if he had two people who knew how to look after him instead of just one.

 

Elrond helped Erestor out of his morning robe and then immersed his hand in the water to check on the temperature. The water couldn't be too hot or it would aggravate the injuries. "It will do," Elrond announced and assisted Erestor in descending into the pool.

 

Glorfindel was in the process of removing his shirt and that realization made Erestor blink. "What are you doing?"

 

"I do not want to get my shirt wet." Glorfindel sat cross-legged behind Erestor and used a cup to wet the raven hair. The sight of all those cuts, bruises, and raw skin made him feel nauseous, but he crushed the sensation and concentrated on washing the ebony hair.

 

Erestor closed his eyes. The sensation of Glorfindel washing his hair made his stomach flutter.

 

The bath ended much too soon. He would have loved to feel Glorfindel's gentle touch longer. In the end, they helped him out of the pool and sat him down on a chair which stood close to the pool. Erestor allowed Elrond to clean the worst cuts. Seeing a frown on Elrond's face, Erestor wondered what was causing it.

 

As Elrond didn't want to worry his friend, he smiled instead. "Less cuts than usual have reopened this time. One or two have even closed completely and new skin is forming." It seemed the deep healing sleep had already improved Erestor's health. "You should try to sleep some more tonight."

 

Glorfindel smiled encouragingly at Erestor. "I told you that sleep would set the healing process in motion."

 

"But…" Erestor's gaze met Elrond's. "That can not be. My healing ability is gone."

 

But Elrond shook his head. "I agree with Glorfindel. You have improved and that is basically because you slept."

 

Erestor stared at his hands, which rested in Elrond's lap. The half-Elf was putting balm onto them and Erestor frowned, realizing the two other Elves were right: the cuts didn't look that angry and red today. But how was that possible?

 

"Glorfindel, why do you not serve dinner on the balcony as you proposed? I agree with you that fresh air would do Erestor good." Now that Glorfindel's 'meddling' was helping, Elrond decided to act more on the warrior's ideas. So far, Glorfindel had done Erestor more good than he, the healer, had done in three long years.

 

"I will do so." Glorfindel slipped into his shirt again, gave Erestor a charming smile, and then left the bathroom to prepare for dinner.

 

"Why are you encouraging him?" Erestor sought out Elrond's gaze and gave him a pleading look. "Glorfindel is already neglecting his duties because of me and…"

 

Elrond interrupted Erestor and decisively shook his head. "Glorfindel found a way to convince you to sleep. His presence is obviously doing you good and I intend to encourage him in every way I can. If his meddling results in you becoming well, I will applaud every action on his part." Elrond expected Erestor to lash out at him, but all that happened was that Erestor gave him a worried look.

 

"Erestor, do you realize that you have improved during these last two days? Your cuts look less angry and your skin has also improved. The only change that took place in your life was that Glorfindel took charge. Why not allow Glorfindel to continue to do so? You *do* want to recover, do you not?"

 

"I want to heal. You know that, but…" Erestor didn't know how to say this. "I do not know how to react to Glorfindel." He had been mostly alone during these last three years and the way Glorfindel acted around him bewildered him.

 

"Why do you not trust Glorfindel to lead you? It looks like he knows exactly how to act around you." Elrond helped Erestor slip on the gloves and then studied his friend. Yes, Erestor definitely looked stronger. He scooped up more balm onto his fingertips and smeared the ointment onto the cuts on the face. "Do you like Glorfindel? Just a little bit?" The fact that Erestor managed to grow flustered amused him. He hadn't thought his friend still capable of blushing. "You do. You like him a lot." That realization pleased him immensely!

 

"Elrond, you really should not react that enthusiastically."

 

"And why is that?" Elrond had finally finished attending to Erestor's injuries and now smiled broadly at his friend. "Is it not a good thing then that the interest is mutual?"

 

"Look at me, Elrond." Erestor lowered his gaze and hid his gloved hands inside the sleeves of his robes. "I am the living dead and Glorfindel… Glorfindel is life itself. I feel the energy that pulses inside him, the intensity of his inner light takes me aback and the glow that surrounds him makes me crave his company even more. What do I have to offer in return? Nothing."

Glorfindel who had been about to enter the bathroom halted in his tracks at hearing Erestor's damning words.

 

Elrond had noticed Glorfindel's return, but managed to hide that fact from Erestor. Acting as if it was still the two of them, he countered, "Do you not think you are exaggerating, Erestor? You still have much to offer and now that you have begun to improve only the Valar know what will happen next."

 

Erestor was too afraid to believe that he might actually make a full recovery. These last three years had been filled with agony and he had become used to feeling lonely. "His interest in me will quickly wear off."

 

"Do you really think that?" Glorfindel had had enough and covered the distance between Erestor and himself. "Look at me when you answer me," he demanded as he watched Erestor lower his gaze. "Do you really think that I will leave once the novelty of your company wears off? Do you really think that little of me?"

 

Erestor swallowed hard – he hadn't known that Glorfindel had heard his words. Forcing himself to look into the sapphire eyes, he found them blazing with blue fire. "I do not think little of you, Glorfindel…"

 

And suddenly Glorfindel understood. Erestor thought little of himself! "Elrond is right," Glorfindel said as his anger evaporated. "You have much to offer." Erestor raised his head and he thought he saw tears in those dark depths. "Will you allow me to walk you to the balcony? I do not know about you, but I am hungry." Elrond had brought plenty of food for the three of them.

 

Erestor felt grateful now that Glorfindel let him off the hook so easily. "I hold you in the highest esteem," he murmured as he rose from the chair.

 

"I know you do." Glorfindel's soft voice revealed compassion and affection. "I just misunderstood."

 

Elrond smiled and followed his friends out onto the balcony. For the first time in over three years he felt hopeful that Erestor would recover and become again the much loved Elf he had been in the past.

 

~~~

 

Ithil's silver beams illuminated the balcony and the set table, aided by the candles which Glorfindel had lit. The warrior guided Erestor to the most comfortable chair of the three that he had moved onto the balcony and waited for the Advisor to sit down before he seated himself. Glorfindel sat down beside Erestor and Elrond took the chair opposite the injured Elf.

 

Erestor shakily reached for the soup and dipped a piece of bread in it. The bread soaked up the moisture and he gingerly swallowed the food. To his surprise, his throat didn't hurt that badly and he wondered if he could eat something more solid like a small piece of meat, or even some fruit.

 

"Ada?"

 

The soft, tiny voice took all three adults aback. Elrond turned his head and his eyes widened as he found two Elflings standing in the doorway. Their hair was tousled, their nightshirts dragged after them, and Elrohir crushed a cuddly toy against his chest. Elladan had an arm tightly wrapped around Elrohir's shoulder and two pair of identical curious eyes looked into his.

 

"What are the two of you doing here?" Elrond left his chair and headed toward the dazed-looking Elflings. "You should be asleep!" Why weren't the twins in bed? And how had they managed to sneak past their mother? "Did I not tell you to never leave your room without your Nana or I close?"

 

"But you are here…" Elrohir whispered the words and his arms opened to wrap around Elrond's neck. "We could not sleep because you did not visit with us."

 

"You promised to finish that tale, Ada, and you did not come to sit with us." Elladan pouted and bit his bottom lip now that Elrond picked Elrohir up, but not him. He wanted to be in his father's arms as well. Eager to be lifted and hugged also, he wobbled away from his father and headed for Glorfindel. He came to a halt in front of the blond Elf and opened his arms. "Hug please."

 

Glorfindel had no other choice but to lift the Elfling and place him on his lap. Elladan's arms tried to wrap around his shoulders, but were still much too short to complete the embrace. "Your father is right, Elladan. You can not leave your room like that. Why did you not ask your mother for a hug instead?"

 

"Naneth is asleep and we do not want to wake her." Elladan rested his face on Glorfindel's shoulder and now caught sight of Erestor's form.

 

Erestor had quickly pulled his hood in place when he was confronted with the twins' presence in his rooms. He didn't want to scare them or send them running off in fear.

 

"Who are you?" Elladan tilted his head and his eyes narrowed.

 

Erestor grew nervous. "I am Erestor and you should return to your room."

 

"Not yet," Elrohir decreed. "Ada, take me over there!" He wanted to be close to Elladan, Glorfindel, and this new Elf they had just met, Erestor. He blinked away his fatigue and raised his arms in order to reach for Elladan.

 

Elrond felt conflicted; he knew that Erestor avoided the twins the best he could as the Advisor was afraid he would scare them out of their minds, but at the same time Celebrían had confided in him that the twins would play a very important role in Erestor's recovery. Making up his mind, Elrond carried his son with him when he returned to sit down at the table. Elrohir moved about in his arms and, in the end, Elrond placed his son on the floor so he could toddle toward Glorfindel who was still holding Elladan.

 

"Glorfindel?" Elrohir tugged at the warrior's leggings and was instantly lifted onto Glorfindel's lap, where he cuddled up to Elladan. Joining his twin in staring at the new mysterious Elf, he said, "I am Elrohir and this is Elladan. We are twins. Who are you, Erestor?"

 

"I am a friend of your father's, little one." Erestor felt anxious and wished Elrond would take the Elflings back to their room. His eyes filled with tears as he remembered happier days – days in which he had rocked them.

 

"You seem familiar…" But Elladan didn't know why. "Can we sit on your lap?"

 

Erestor regretted hurting their feelings. "No, you can not. You look comfortable on Glorfindel's lap at any rate." Elladan's eyes filled with more questions and Erestor dreaded the possibility of the Elfling asking him more personal questions. "You should return to your warm bed."

 

"But we want to be with Ada and Glorfindel," Elrohir replied softly.

 

"And now with you…" Elladan smiled sleepily at Erestor. "Do you have a face?" All he saw from beneath the hood were large eyes. Eyes which looked familiar. The Elfling was convinced that he had seen them before.

 

"Elladan, look!" Elrohir had discovered a bowl filled with sweet treats on the table and tried to lunge for them. Losing his balance, he threatened to topple over, but a gloved hand instantly steadied him. Elrohir stared at the black glove and something in his eyes changed. "Why is your hand black?" The Elfling had never seen gloves before and didn't know what to make of them.

 

"Because I am cold," Erestor answered quickly, finding a way out. "Elrond, would you kindly pick your son up?" Elrohir was doing his best to climb onto his lap and, although he would love to hold the Elfling, his injuries didn't allow him to do so. The tiny, greedy hands were already causing him pain as they tried to grab hold of him.

 

Elrond moved quickly and took hold of Elrohir's hands before the Elfling could cause more damage to Erestor's fragile skin. Lifting Elrohir in his arms, he settled the boy against his chest. "I should return you to your room. Glorfindel, hand me my son."

 

Glorfindel handed Elladan over to Elrond and watched with a huge smile on his face how Elladan tried to escape his father again so he could climb back onto the warrior's lap. "Be a good boy now, Elladan."

Elladan continued to pout, but this time he listened and clawed at Elrond's robes with his tiny fingers. "Can we come back here tomorrow?" His gaze shifted from Glorfindel to Erestor. Elladan tried to discern the adult's features inside the hood.

 

Erestor shook his head and replied before either Glorfindel or Elrond could speak. "You can never return here, little one."

 

"Do not listen to him," Elrond retorted as he walked toward the doorway. "Erestor is merely tired and a bit grumpy. Yes, you can return here but only in Glorfindel's or my company, do you hear me? Do not sneak into Erestor's rooms alone."

 

Erestor glared at Elrond, but as the half-Elf's back was turned toward him, Elrond never noticed. "How can he say such a thing?" Erestor questioned the moment Elrond had closed the door behind him. "He knows that I do not want them here!"

 

"And why is that?" Glorfindel reached for the hood and pushed it back, revealing Erestor's marred face once more. "Do you dislike them that much?"

 

Erestor stared at his hands which rested in his lap. "I do not dislike them. I like them too much, Glorfindel. Do you not understand? I rocked them to sleep, giving Celebrían and Elrond a chance to catch up on their rest. I held them close when they were only a few days old."

 

"And you are scared of the way they will react should they see your face and realize your injuries." Glorfindel finally understood. "But as you like them I assume you see the wisdom in Elrond's words? Having the Elflings around will do you good."

 

Erestor reluctantly nodded his head. "I have missed them terribly."

 

Glorfindel handed Erestor a bowl filled with fruit which had been cut into small pieces. "Eat, Erestor and once you feel full, tell me. We will move this to the bed then. That way you can go to sleep once you feel tired." He hoped Elrond wouldn't return any time soon as he wanted to spend time with Erestor in private.

 

"Do you plan on staying tonight as well, then?"

 

Glorfindel heard the hopeful tone in Erestor's voice and quickly nodded his head. "Tonight and the next nights as well. I will stay for as long as you need me."

 

They finished dinner in a companionable silence after that and when Glorfindel decided it was time for Erestor to go to sleep, the Advisor complied without protesting. Erestor curled up on his side and, to the Advisor's surprise, Glorfindel stretched out on the bed in front of him. Since they were face to face it was impossible to miss the huge smile that seemed plastered onto the warrior's face. Glorfindel looked awfully smug and Erestor's last questioning thought before drifting off into sleep was why Glorfindel felt that self-satisfied.

 

Glorfindel's smile broadened now that Erestor easily glided into a peaceful sleep. His presence seemed to soothe the troubled Advisor and he twined his fingers around the raven mane which was still a bit damp. "I am here for you," Glorfindel whispered. "And I will remain at your side as long as you need me. Sleep and recover, Erestor, for I want to see you healed." This time, Glorfindel failed to remain awake for long. These last few nights had exhausted him and, as he drifted off into sleep, his fingers fingered the silken hair between their tips. Glorfindel's last thought before falling asleep was, ‘This feels nice’.

 

~~~

 

Glorfindel awoke during the night because Erestor was producing distressing sounds. The raven-haired Elf moved restlessly in his sleep and the movement had to have been causing the injured Elf pain, so Glorfindel reacted by mumbling soothingly. "Everything is all right, Erestor. You are having a bad dream. If you wake up right now you will find me at your side, just as I promised." He wanted to comfort Erestor through touch, but he was afraid he would do more harm than good. "Erestor calm down. You are in your bed and you are safe – very safe. I am guarding you."

 

The dark-brown eyes which had been closed in their healing sleep now opened. Erestor gazed at him with a distraught expression in them.

 

"I am here, Erestor. I would like to hold you in your sleep, but I do not want to add to your discomfort." Glorfindel settled for caressing strands of Erestor's hair instead. "Did you suffer from a nightmare? Or did I wake you in time?"

 

"You are still here?" Erestor blinked. Glorfindel was close, so very close, and all he needed to do in order to establish some physical contact was to scoot closer. He had been lonely for years and, although Elrond had tried to comfort him, the half-Elf had never succeeded in reaching him. It was different with Glorfindel though. As he was already in love with the golden-haired warrior, it was easier to lower his guard and allow Glorfindel in. "Did I fall asleep again?"

 

"Yes you did and it was a healing sleep." Glorfindel didn't push for an answer to his question. Maybe Erestor just wanted to forget he'd had an unpleasant dream. "Erestor, I will lend you all the strength you need in order to face and defeat your tormentors."

 

Erestor finally registered the fact that Glorfindel was caressing his hair and his mouth went dry as he saw the loving expression in the azure eyes. "Why?" He needed the answer to that question.

 

"Because I care for you. This might seem rash, but it is not. Not really. I have been following you for weeks. I have studied you and, while I learned more about you, I realized I like you. I like you a lot, Erestor. There is something about you that intrigues me."

 

"Are you speaking of love?" Surely, that couldn't be? Erestor felt dazed.

 

Glorfindel smiled, warmly. "Maybe, it is a bit early to tell, but the fact that we are in bed together should open our eyes." Glorfindel wrapped the end of a strand of black hair around his fingertip and toyed with it.

 

Erestor felt at a loss. "Glorfindel, this can never be. Even though I return your feelings I…"

 

Glorfindel suddenly sat up and this movement caused Erestor to grow silent and simply stare at him. "What did you say?" Glorfindel searched the dark eyes and saw the truth there. "You return my feelings?" Was Erestor in love with him? Why hadn't he realized that before? That was probably the very reason Erestor had allowed him in to his life. He felt deeply honored that the injured Elf had made himself so vulnerable.

 

"Yes, that is what I said." Erestor tried to make sense of the emotions flashing in Glorfindel's eyes, but failed to do so. "Glorfindel, if you had let me finish I would have said that although I return your feelings this will never work out."

 

Glorfindel grew alarmed at hearing the defeated tone in Erestor's voice. "What?"

 

"Glorfindel, you know what those Orcs did to me. You also know that I can never be anyone's lover. I could never… perform those acts… and neither do I want to engage in them. I hurt all over… My skin is a battlefield of scars and…"

 

"Hush, do not speak like that!" Glorfindel carefully placed a finger against Erestor's lips to stop the other Elf from speaking.

 

But Erestor pulled away and continued anyway. "I will never be able to bind with you as proper lovers do. You can not want such a half-bond."

 

Glorfindel shook his head and scooted closer. "Why do you think I need to express my love for you physically at a time when you are hurting that much? We do not need to bond in a physical way. I want to be there for you in every other way, Erestor. I want to see you healed and, once you are whole again, we can still decide what to do."

 

"How are you so convinced that I will heal?" Glorfindel's fervor puzzled Erestor.

 

"You have not faded like other Elves have. You are still here, you are still fighting, and, even more importantly, you are healing. Elrond said so himself: your cuts are mending, new skin is forming, and you are allowing me in. Why do we not take this one step at a time?"

 

"I do not want you to fall prey to a lost cause, Glorfindel."

 

"You are not a lost cause!" Glorfindel stated in a determined voice. Then his demeanor softened. "I would like to hold you, but I am afraid I will cause you pain."

 

"I am not in that much pain at the moment." That discovery surprised Erestor, who had become used to living in constant discomfort. "Do you think it is because you are close?"

 

"It might be because you love me… or because I love you." Glorfindel moved closer still and lifted an arm, giving Erestor the choice to scoot closer or not. "When I was but an Elfling my mother told me tales about true love and the power true love has to change people's lives for the better." His heart missed a beat due to excitement as Erestor moved into his arms. The raven head came to rest against his shoulder and he carefully rested his hand on a section of Erestor's body which wasn't, hopefully, aching too badly. "If I am hurting you, tell me and I will remove my hand."

 

"Your touch does not bring me pain." Erestor sighed against Glorfindel's chest and tears escaped his eyes. "I missed this… I missed being held… or just feeling someone close at night."

 

"You are lonely no more," Glorfindel promised passionately. He pressed a chaste kiss onto Erestor's hair and held the injured Elf close. "Try to go back to sleep, Erestor. You need to heal and you will heal the best in your sleep. I am here and I will stay here. I am not leaving. You can trust me to guard your sleep." Listening closely, he heard how Erestor's breathing evened out. The injured Elf had gone back to sleep.

 

This time, Glorfindel stayed awake. He was no longer tired and reveled in feeling Erestor snuggled up to him. "You are not a lost cause," he repeated firmly. "I will never give up on you and neither will you."

 

~~~

 

When Erestor opened his eyes the next morning, a most lovely sight greeted him. Glorfindel was fast asleep. The blue eyes still possessed an alert expression, even in the clutches of sleep. The pouted lips were slightly open and moved whenever the blond Elf exhaled. Glorfindel's hand still rested on his thigh and Erestor succumbed to the temptation of running his fingers through the golden hair. When he had told Elrond that Glorfindel was life itself, he hadn't exaggerated and the injured Elf *did* wonder what he had left to offer. The fact that Glorfindel had feelings for him stunned him. He had never expected for that to happen.

 

Cherishing this moment of utter peace and bliss, he continued to stare at Glorfindel. The warrior had completely taken over his life and the only certainty that Erestor was left with was the fact that Glorfindel would do anything to see him healed. Glorfindel had even hinted that he would enter a bond in which there would be no physical contact. Erestor didn't feel comfortable with that idea. He didn't want Glorfindel to be stuck in such a relationship. The warrior only deserved the best.

 

"I like it when you run your fingers through my hair, but Erestor, you really have to stop brooding first thing in the morning." Glorfindel's eyes had filled with awareness and now studied the dark-haired Elf in turn. "It is way too early to feel burdened."

 

Erestor managed a weak smile and realized that he had begun to smile a lot more now that Glorfindel had entered his life. He hadn't exaggerated when he had told Elrond that he could literally see Glorfindel's inner light shine ever so brightly. He saw it right now. "And what would you rather have me do in the morning?"

 

Glorfindel perked up at hearing the question. "What do you usually do?"

 

"Assist Elrond." Erestor's smile faded. "Like you, I have been neglecting my duties."

 

"Do not worry about that. Elrond assured me that everything is handled." Glorfindel suspected Melpomaen, another one of Elrond's advisors, had taken over Erestor's duties. "You do not have to flee in to work any more to forget about your pain."

 

"And what about you? Do you not resent me for keeping you from work?" Slowly, Erestor raised a hand and allowed for his gloved fingers to move through Glorfindel's hair.

 

Glorfindel frowned as he wondered about something. "Does the fabric not irritate your skin?"

 

"It does, but I would rather wear these robes and my gloves than to see you turn away from me in disgust." It was his way of hiding his shame and his injuries.

 

Erestor's answer didn’t please Glorfindel. "I would never do that to you! Would you now kindly remove your gloves and the robes? I want to attend to your cuts and after that we will have breakfast."

 

"And then what?" The prospect of spending the day in Glorfindel's company made Erestor feel excited.

 

"We could play chess and you could beat me again. Or you could tell me why you never mentioned that you are a gifted artist." Seeing Erestor's puzzled expression, Glorfindel explained, "I found your sketch book."

 

"I am not gifted, Glorfindel." Erestor wondered just how much Glorfindel had learned about him. "I do not draw very well."

 

"I beg to differ." Glorfindel winked at Erestor. "Now, are you ready to face the day?"

 

"Do I have a choice?"

 

"Not really," Glorfindel replied, cheekily. He felt grateful that Erestor loved him as that love helped the first hint of a spark to return to those dark eyes. /That love will help him heal./

 

~~~

 

Glorfindel took great care to treat Erestor's skin very gently. The dark-haired Elf had, after numerous protests, finally taken off his gloves and his robes, but Erestor *had* insisted Glorfindel hand him a nightshirt, made from a light soft fabric as he didn't want to be completely naked. Glorfindel had removed the old bandages, cleaned the wounds, and smeared more balm onto the cuts. "I believe Elrond was right when he said that your skin is improving. There is no blood on the old bandages and most of the cuts are closing or have already closed. Look for yourself."

 

The last thing Erestor wanted was to be once more confronted with his hideous wounds, but Glorfindel's words confused him and he lowered his gaze to check on the condition of his hands. He blinked, realizing Glorfindel was right – the cuts hadn't bled last night and the skin looked healthier, even a bit pink while it was normally an angry red. "I do not understand how this can be. I should have lost my healing ability."

 

Glorfindel continued to apply the balm, but also managed to catch Erestor's gaze. "Did you ever wonder why you did not fade? Why Námo did not call you to his Halls as he should have?"

 

Erestor carefully shrugged his shoulders, something he hadn't dared to do for a long time because he was afraid of the pain the movement would bring. "I did wonder about that, but I never found an answer. And neither did Elrond. I should have died after the attack, but I did not."

 

"Námo's ways are unpredictable. I spoke with him a few times and he never answered any of the questions I had. He simply told me to accept what would happen next, and the next moment, I found myself in Middle-Earth again, watching Mithrandír smoke his pipe. Maybe Námo has plans for you as well?" /Did Námo know that I would grow interested in you? Did the Vala know that I would want to build this relationship? That our love would help you heal? Are you the reason that I was really sent back?/ Or did he overestimate his worth? Was it all just a coincidence? But the thing was that he no longer believed in coincidences!

 

"I do not believe I hold such importance that Námo would interfere with my life."

 

"He did not interfere with your life, Erestor. He interfered with your death." Glorfindel watched Erestor intently. The facial skin had hugely improved over the last few days, and the fact that he hadn't found a single cut that was still bleeding, encouraged him to believe that Erestor was on his way to recovery. Glorfindel rose from his chair and searched for a mirror. Finding a small hand-held one, he returned to Erestor's side and raised it so the dark-haired Elf could see his reflection. "Tell me, Erestor, do you think you have improved? And answer truthfully."

 

Erestor stared at his reflection and, now that he was provided with evidence, he could no longer deny what was happening. "You are right – I am recovering." His face didn't look as hideous as it had and the pain had lessened. "Thank you, Glorfindel."

 

"This is not entirely my achievement. Your acceptance of our love plays a very important part in your recovery, Erestor." The frown on Erestor's face made him continue, "You stopped fighting me, and our love, Erestor."

 

Erestor's gaze shifted from his reflection to Glorfindel's face. "Do you really love me?" He knew that it was unfair to ask the warrior that question, but he needed to hear the answer.

 

"Yes, I do. What will convince you to believe my words?" Glorfindel put the mirror down, cocked his head, and studied the needy expression in the dark eyes. "A kiss, maybe?" Erestor's eyes widened and Glorfindel would have thought it comical, if he hadn't known the dark-haired Elf thought himself too repulsive to be kissed. "Would you like that? To be kissed?"

 

Erestor blinked; Glorfindel couldn't be serious! But then soft lips pressed against his in the gentlest kiss Arda had ever seen. Erestor's breath escaped him and he stared big-eyed at Glorfindel's face. "You… kissed… me," Erestor stuttered once Glorfindel had released his lips.

 

"That is a very brilliant observation, worthy of a Chief Advisor," Glorfindel teased. Erestor's dazed expression told him that being kissed had been the last thing the other Elf had expected to happen and that realization saddened him.

 

"But… I… my wounds… the cuts… the balm…" Why didn't all those things repulse Glorfindel? Did the warrior really love him? But that was one step Erestor wasn't ready yet to take.

 

And Glorfindel understood. Erestor had thought of himself as repugnant for much too long. He couldn't undo the way Erestor thought of himself in a few days – that needed time and that was the one thing they had in surplus. "If you agree to have breakfast with me on the balcony I will kiss you again."

 

Erestor felt conflicted; yes, he wanted to feel those lips pressed against his again, but the daylight would give him little opportunity to hide now that he had promised Glorfindel not to cover himself up with heavy robes, a hood, and gloves. "But they will see me."

 

"And why exactly is that a bad thing?" Glorfindel considered his next words very carefully. "When I first discovered your presence here I asked around to find out more about you. Every Elf I addressed spoke your name with the greatest respect, but none would tell me what had happened to you." Glorfindel saw Erestor's bottom lip tremble and just knew what was going on in that raven head. "I understand why you feel ashamed and why you want to hide, but the truth is that you are keeping yourself back from healing, Erestor. What you need is to sit in the shade, feel hints of sunlight on your skin, engage in conversation, and allow your lover to touch you affectionately."

 

"I really want to heal," Erestor murmured as he averted his eyes. "But I know how they will react when they see me… and see my injuries in particular."

 

"No, you do not." Glorfindel resolutely pulled Erestor onto his feet. He expected the injured Elf to flinch in pain, but Erestor showed no signs of discomfort. /He is healing faster than we both realized./

 

Erestor considered fighting Glorfindel over this, but in the end, he lacked the energy and the will to do so. If Glorfindel was so determined to do this, then let him be. Glorfindel would find out that the reactions toward him wouldn't be encouraging and then the blond Elf would abandon these efforts.

 

By now they had reached the balcony and Erestor gingerly sat down.

 

"Wait here and do not move. I will fetch our breakfast." The servant had placed it at their doorstep earlier.

 

A tree, standing in front of his balcony, offered Erestor some shade and Arien's rays merely caressed his hair and skin and never burned him. He watched, quite confused, how Glorfindel returned and placed breakfast on the table. One quick look around told him that the other balconies were empty, but he mused that several Elves had already spotted him through their windows. He really didn't want to be here, but for Glorfindel's sake he would face their distressed looks.

 

"And now eat." Glorfindel handed Erestor a bowl filled with porridge. "That should go easy on your throat."

 

/He noticed that?/ Glorfindel was way more observant than he had thought!

 

"Maybe you can try some fruit after you finished your porridge." Glorfindel buttered a slice of bread, added cheese to it, and took a giant bite out of it. He hadn't realized just how hungry he was!

 

Erestor slowly ate his porridge, feeling quite pleased that his hands hurt less than they usually did. Maybe he should do as Glorfindel suggested and accept that he was improving. He doubted very much that Námo had a personal interest in him, but then again, why had the Vala not called him to his Halls after he had been raped? Glorfindel's observations had only created more questions.

 

"You feel better today," Glorfindel said, trying to create more conversation.

 

"I do." Erestor saw no point in denying the truth. "But I still do not understand how this can be."

 

Glorfindel was about to lean in closer to give Erestor the kiss he had promised the Chief Advisor when something unexpected happened.

 

"Glorfindel!"

 

One of the twins had called out the warrior's name and Glorfindel raised his hand to greet them. "Good morning!" Celebrían, flanked by her sons, stood on the balcony opposite Erestor's and her eyes twinkled at seeing them. Glorfindel suddenly wondered if she would be willing to join them. "My Lady, we have some fruit to spare… Maybe Elrohir and Elladan are still hungry?"

 

"They are always hungry," Celebrían called out to Glorfindel. She saw the alarmed expression in Erestor's eyes and smiled encouragingly. /You have been hiding for much too long, my dear friend./

 

"Nana? Why does Erestor's face look funny?" Elladan tugged at his mother's dress and Celebrían lowered herself onto her heels to answer his question.

 

"Because he has been hurt, Elladan." A thoughtful expression appeared in Elladan's eyes and she let him ponder her words for a while. In the meantime, Elrohir gained a hold on one of her braids and she tilted her head in his direction. "What is it, Elrohir?"

 

"Is that the reason why he did not want us to sit on his lap? Is he hurting?" Elrohir still had to experience real pain, but Elrond had taken them to the Healing House a few times and they seen the pain his patients had been in.

 

Celebrían nodded her head and waited for her sons to speak again.

 

"Can we visit with him?" Elladan had reached a decision and now began to drag his mother and Elrohir toward the doorway.

 

"Why do you want to visit with him?" Celebrían followed, delighted that her sons seemed to accept Erestor just the way he was, wounds and all.

 

"You will see," Elrohir replied instead. He had only needed to exchange one look with Elladan to know what his brother was up to.

 

Celebrían let them take the lead. She turned around and called out to the two Elves on the other balcony, "We will join you!"

 

Glorfindel heard Erestor gasp. Searching the Advisor's face, Glorfindel frowned. "You do not want them to join us? But I thought you liked the twins – and Celebrían?"

 

"I do, but… Glorfindel, they saw my face… And once they are here they will see my wounds from up close. I can not allow for that to happen. Surely you understand?" Erestor frantically looked about for his formal robes which had a hood attached to them. The white nightshirt he wore would do little to hide his injuries from the twins. "I do not want them to be afraid of me."

 

"I do not think they will fear you," Glorfindel replied in a steadfast voice.

 

Erestor was about to reprimand Glorfindel and to tell the warrior to fetch him his robes when the twins dragged their mother onto the balcony. Erestor paled and dug his fingernails into the wood of the armrest.

 

Elladan let go of his mother's hand and claimed Elrohir's instead. Pulling his twin with him, Elladan determinedly advanced on Erestor.

 

Erestor pressed back against the comfort of his chair. He desperately wanted to flee the balcony, but the twins were already too close. "Glorfindel," he whispered the warrior's name in the hope that the other Elf would come to his aid, but nothing happened.

 

Elladan came to a halt in front of Erestor and cocked his head like he had seen his father do. "Are you hurt?"

 

Erestor swallowed, hard. His throat felt awfully dry as he stared at the tiny Elfling who stood so courageously in front of him. "Yes, I hurt."

 

Elrohir now moved forward and this time it was he who dragged Elladan with him. "Do your legs also hurt?"

 

Erestor blinked at hearing that question. "No, my legs are fine." The Orcs had concentrated on inflicting damage to his upper body. Nothing could have prepared him for the twins' next action. Elrohir wrapped his arms around his left leg, while Elladan rested his head on his right knee, looking up at him. "Glorfindel… help me." He had never felt this much at a loss before!

 

But Glorfindel remained motionless and merely exchanged a knowing smile with Celebrían. "I do not believe you need help, Erestor."

 

Elladan then did something that upset Erestor. The Elfling pressed a kiss against his knee. "Elladan, no…"

 

"You can tell us apart," Elladan replied, pleased. "Only our Nana and Ada can do that. Why can you tell us apart as well?"

 

"Why did you do that?" Erestor replied with a question of his own, finding Elrohir pressing another kiss against the fabric of his nightshirt.

 

"Our kisses will make it all better. That is what Nana does when we feel lonely or cry." Elladan hugged Erestor's leg even tighter. Even at their tender age, the twins knew exactly what Erestor needed.

 

Glorfindel's eyes swam with tears. Elladan and Elrohir had drawn the right conclusions and he felt grateful that they bestowed their love so freely on Erestor.

 

Celebrían, sensing the emotional turmoil Erestor as well as Glorfindel were in, took the lead. "Elladan, Elrohir, come over here and sit with me. There are still some slices of cake left." As far as she was concerned they had earned this little treat after demonstrating their affection so openly. "Let go of Erestor's legs."

 

The twins reluctantly complied and returned to their mother. Celebrían pulled Elrohir onto her lap and handed Elladan to Glorfindel. The twins made themselves comfortable and busied themselves by nibbling on the cake.

 

Erestor managed to compose himself and peeked at Glorfindel's face. Seeing the swimming eyes, he reached out and curled his fingers around the warrior's. Being touched in that way caused Glorfindel's eyes to lighten with joy and the tears faded into the background. Glorfindel gently rubbed his fingers and Erestor felt something he hadn't felt for a very long time – he felt at ease and loved.

 

~~~

 

The rest of the day passed by rather uneventfully. Glorfindel kept Erestor distracted by losing one chess game after another and in the end, Erestor confided in him that he had indeed drawn those portraits.

 

"Moving your hands must have caused you pain," Glorfindel commented during dinner. He was pleased to see that Erestor's appetite was increasing. Erestor could eat more than just the soaked bread and was nibbling on meats.

 

"It was worth it. I could not be around the people I loved and by drawing them I could take them out and look at them as many times as I wanted." Erestor pushed his plate away from him. "I have not eaten that much in a very long time."

 

Glorfindel considered Erestor. It was still early in the evening – much too early to remain indoors or to go to bed. "When was the last time you walked in the gardens, Erestor?"

 

Erestor stared at Glorfindel as if the warrior had grown a second head. "Glorfindel, it is bad enough that you dragged me onto the balcony and that the twins took a hold of me…"

 

Glorfindel cut Erestor short. "They did not run away from you, did they? They were not afraid of you. They even wanted to make you better." 

 

"That is true." Erestor shook his head. "Why are you so determined to upend my life?"

 

"Because I want your life to be worth living and I do not think you should hide in here. You need to be out in the open, inhale the air, get some exercise, and you should do those things in my company." Glorfindel smiled smugly at Erestor. "It is working, is it not?"

 

"It is." Erestor had no argument to refuse Glorfindel a walk in the gardens.

 

"We will go for that walk shortly." Glorfindel moved his chair closer to Erestor and gently gathered the other Elf's hand in his. "The gardens are quite deserted at this hour, so do not worry. Most Elves gather in the Hall of Fire to listen to the minstrels."

 

"Leaving my rooms frightens me," Erestor admitted in a strangled voice. "I feel safe here. I even feel safe at Elrond's study, but that is because no one ventures in there unannounced – except for you that is. You never take a no for an answer, do you?"

 

"No, I do not." Glorfindel gave Erestor a sweet smile and caressed the long fingers. He was already looking forward to taking Erestor for that walk in the rose gardens. Leaning in closer, Glorfindel finally managed to press his lips against Erestor's, giving the Advisor the kiss he had promised the dark-haired Elf that morning.

 

~~~

 

"Here… Smell this…" Glorfindel held a red rose near Erestor's nostrils and watched the dark-haired Elf inhale the sweet scent. Erestor had been adamant that he wear his robes, hood, and gloves for their walk and Glorfindel had given in, already grateful that Erestor had agreed to go for this stroll in the gardens.

 

"Lovely." Erestor smiled coyly at Glorfindel. A part of him still didn't understand why Glorfindel was actually attempting to woo him. He had already told Glorfindel that he would never be able to establish a physical relationship and yet the warrior seemed determined to try.

 

"Maybe we should gather some more and take them to your rooms." Their lovely fragrances would hopefully chase away the smell of blood that still lingered in the Advisor's chambers. Glorfindel gathered several long-stemmed roses and cradled them in his arms. Erestor had a distant expression in his eyes and Glorfindel strayed a little away from the other Elf so Erestor could explore a bit more freely. It saddened the warrior that this was the first time in three years that Erestor had set foot in the gardens.

 

"Good evening, Erestor… Glorfindel."

 

Elrond's voice, unexpected and coming from so close, startled Erestor, who had been lost in thought. Looking up, he found the Lord and Lady of Imladris standing in front of him. Apparently Glorfindel wasn't the only one who had set his mind on walking in the rose garden. Speechless, Erestor met Elrond's inquiring gaze.

 

"It is quite a pleasure to see you here, Erestor. I know how long it has been since you last visited these gardens." Elrond's heart leapt in his chest with joy at seeing that the cuts had healed up further. At this rate, all Erestor needed were a few more nights of sleep and his friend would make a full recovery. In body that is. Elrond knew that the invisible wounds were the hardest to do away with, but he gave Glorfindel good chances at dealing with those as well. "I heard that my sons visited with you today?" He had been flabbergasted to hear from his wife that the twins had tried to 'kiss Erestor better'.

 

"Yes, they did… much to my surprise." Erestor felt a bit bashful, though he couldn't quite explain why. He had never felt shy in Elrond's presence before.

 

"The twins like you a great deal," Celebrían added. "And they are not afraid of you. They simply accept that you look different."

 

"The cuts continue to heal," Elrond said, thoughtfully studying Erestor's face. The hood had – apparently unnoticed – slipped backwards, revealing the Advisor's face. The fact that Erestor hadn't even noticed that his face was exposed told Elrond just how comfortable his friend was – and that was something which surprised him.

 

"Why do you not hold these while I gather more?" Glorfindel gave Erestor a blinding smile and placed the roses in the other Elf's arms.

 

His face grew even more flustered and Erestor fully realized that he was blushing like a maiden who had gone for an evening stroll with her first lover.

 

"Ah, he is already giving you roses? You are most fortunate, Erestor." Celebrían had also sensed Erestor's nervousness and tried to distract them. "Elrond, do you not think your wife is also entitled to some roses?"

 

Elrond looped his arm with her and replied, "You will get your roses, my heart." Giving Glorfindel a look filled with understanding, he began to guide his wife toward a more secluded part of the gardens. "Enjoy your evening, my friends… I know I will."

 

The last thing Erestor and Glorfindel heard was Celebrían's giggling before the happy couple disappeared behind a hedge. "Those two are very happy," Glorfindel remarked as he returned from gathering more roses.

 

"Do you want to have what they have?" Erestor's fingers carefully moved over the rose petals and stayed clear of their thorns.

 

Reading between the lines, Glorfindel replied, "Yes, but I want to have that with you and no one else."

 

Those words told Erestor just how determined Glorfindel was to make this work. And for the first time since Glorfindel had started this quest to win his heart, Erestor actually believed that the warrior would succeed in realizing his dream.

 

~~~

 

The fact that Erestor fell asleep more easily each night assured Glorfindel that he was doing everything right. Looking closely at Erestor's face now, Glorfindel swore that he could actually see the skin improve.

 

Before they had gone to bed, he had checked on the condition of Erestor's wounds and had found that all of them had closed. Erestor had given him an odd look when he had told the dark-haired Elf that they no longer needed the bandages, but the Advisor had accepted his decision. And so Glorfindel had only applied the balm. /I doubt he even needs the balm any more. He is healing on his own strength./

 

Glorfindel had curled himself around Erestor's form and held the Advisor loosely in order not to put any pressure on the still healing skin. The air was hot tonight and Glorfindel was unable to sleep. Although he didn't want to leave Erestor alone in the bed, he needed some fresh air. Releasing Erestor from his hold, he pushed himself upright and then rose from the bed. Glorfindel stepped onto the balcony and deeply inhaled the air, only now fully realizing that it had been days that he had last been in his own chambers.

 

"Tell me, Glorfindel, do you now approve of my decision to send you back to Middle-Earth?"

 

Glorfindel's eyes widened and he spun around to face the intruder. He had already recognized Námo's voice, but he was still surprised to see the Vala leaning against the balustrade. His first thought was that the Vala had come for Erestor after all and, as he felt protective of his beloved, he took a step to the side, blocking Námo's way so the Vala couldn't step into the bedroom.

 

"Peace, Glorfindel." Námo chuckled at seeing the protectiveness in the eyes. "I did not come here in order to claim a soul."

 

"Then why are you here, my Lord?" Glorfindel didn't trust the Doomsman of the Valar.

 

"When you heard that you were to be reborn you fought me over that decision. Do you remember that, Glorfindel?" Námo smoothed out the fabric of his burgundy robes and brushed strands of auburn hair out of his face. As he belonged to the Valar, he possessed the power to change his appearance as he liked and Glorfindel had never seen him in this guise before, but the warrior had immediately recognized his power.

 

"I fought you because you decided against Ecthelion's rebirth. I felt alone and cheated." Glorfindel's curiosity awoke and he wondered what had made Námo visit him. "Why are you here, my Lord, if it not to claim Erestor's fëa?"

 

Námo's green eyes twinkled with amusement. "Glorfindel, you *do* realize that I can take hold of Erestor's soul any time I want? Why should I bother to reveal myself to you, then?"

 

"Then this is not about Erestor?" Glorfindel remained on his guard.

 

"Oh, make no mistake, this *is* about Erestor. It has always been about Erestor."

 

"I do not understand, my Lord." Glorfindel cast a look over his shoulder and was relieved to find that Erestor was still soundly asleep.

 

"You recalled the stories your mother told you about true love, Glorfindel." Námo took a few steps closer to Glorfindel, who bravely stood his ground. "Do you agree with me that one of the Firstborn should experience true love at least once?"

 

Glorfindel's eyes remained narrowed. "It would be a great misfortune if an Elf did not find true love in their lifetime."

 

"Glorfindel, tell me, do you think that Ecthelion was your true love?" Námo raised a hand and fingered a lock of Glorfindel's hair between his fingertips.

 

Glorfindel frowned. "I did…" Then, he realized something important. "You do not agree?"

 

"You loved Ecthelion and he returned that sentiment, but did loving Ecthelion ever feel like loving Erestor? And be honest, Glorfindel."

 

Glorfindel searched his feelings and admitted the truth. "It did not. Loving Erestor feels different – more powerful."

 

The Vala nodded once. "Your love is true. That is why his wounds are healing."

 

Glorfindel cocked his head. "My Lord, why did you not free his fëa after that attack? You should have."

 

"Because my brother is hopelessly romantic." Lórien stepped out of the shadows and smiled in amusement at Námo. "He will probably deny that, but the fact remains that it is the truth."

 

Námo arched an eyebrow at unexpectedly finding the golden-haired Vala so close. "What are you doing here?"

 

"I am only curious, dear brother." Lórien's golden eyes sparkled with sun light. "You *are* a romantic."

 

Námo shrugged his shoulders. "I did not want to stand in the way of true love."

 

"That is why you did not summon him to your halls after the attack?" Glorfindel had a hard time believing what the two Valar were telling him.

 

Lórien's white robes moved around his frame when he advanced on Námo. "Why do you not answer his question, brother-mine?"

 

Námo snorted. "As I said before, each member of the Firstborn should experience true love in their life time."

 

"My Lord, does this mean that Erestor will heal? Will he make a full recovery?" Glorfindel grew excited in spite of their intimidating presence.

 

Nodding his head again, Námo responded, "He will – eventually." Erestor's future held no secrets to him. Telling Glorfindel that Erestor still had to face one last challenge was not his place and so he remained quiet. He had already meddled enough.

 

"Come with me, brother. We already intervened enough in the affairs of the Firstborn." Lórien smiled smugly at his brother and then turned around. Stepping back into the shadows again, he disappeared from view

 

"It is not over yet," Námo murmured as he followed his brother into the night's shadows. "But know this… You will be rewarded in the end – both of you." After uttering those mystifying words, the Vala faded into the night's darkness.

 

Glorfindel remained behind, alone and confused, but also hopeful.

 

~~~

 

Erestor awoke to a most lovely sensation of lips brushing his and fingertips gently caressing his face. A smile formed on his lips and his eyes filled with awareness. As expected, Glorfindel smiled back at him. The blond Elf released his lips, but the large, strong hands continued to caress his face. "I do not hurt any more," Erestor whispered as he voiced his surprise. The pain which had been his constant companion for three long years was gone.

 

"Your wounds have closed, Erestor, and new skin is forming. I seriously doubt that you need to continue to use that balm. Your healing is happening right here." Glorfindel placed his hand over Erestor's heart. His conversation with the Valar came to mind, but he decided against telling his beloved. He doubted Erestor would believe he'd actually had that encounter. "And you slept peacefully. No nightmares disturbed your slumber."

 

"That must be due to your presence." Erestor coyly looked at Glorfindel. "It feels so good being without pain."

 

"You will continue to improve and you will make a full recovery, physically at least." Glorfindel left much unsaid in the hope that Erestor would pick up on it and react.

 

"Glorfindel, I…" Erestor moistened his lips as he was unable to hide his nervousness. "After the attack happened, I talked to Elrond for many weeks. I learned to accept why the Orcs murdered my escort, why they hurt me in such a way, and why they allowed me to escape. The only thing I never understood was why Námo did not call me to his Halls."

 

Glorfindel coughed in order to clear his throat. He was still hesitant to reveal his conversation with the Valar and opted for saying, "Maybe Námo knew true love was waiting for you in your future?" Glorfindel blushed.

 

Erestor smiled almost giddily. "Do you really believe true love is the reason why I was not summoned to his Halls?"

 

"The Doomsman of the Valar knows the future, Erestor. Yes, I believe that he has foreseen us falling in love." Lazily, Glorfindel ran his fingers through Erestor's raven mane. "Erestor, there is something else I want to discuss with you."

 

Erestor closed his eyes in bliss at feeling Glorfindel's fingertips settle at and then massage the column of his neck. "What do you want to talk about?"

 

Glorfindel continued with caution. "You once told me that you were unable to have an intimate relationship and that you could not imagine enjoying being touched ever again. Do you still feel that way?" Erestor's eyes opened and fastened on him with a knowing expression in them.

 

"I might have spoken too quickly." Erestor lowered his eyes as he felt strangely shy. "I crave your touch… More kisses… Your love. I want that… I want what Celebrían and Elrond have… But at the same time I wonder… Am I good enough for you?"

 

The large, brown eyes looked up and Glorfindel's heart missed a beat at seeing the hurt and self-doubt in them. "I love you, Erestor, and I want you. I want you every way you feel comfortable with. I will never push or pressure you and I will be happy with every touch you will bestow on me."

 

"You ask for so little and I want to give you so much," Erestor whispered, hating himself for disappointing Glorfindel. "I want to be able to be intimate with you, but…"

 

Glorfindel quickly rested a finger against Erestor's lips and thus stopped the dark-haired Elf from speaking any further. "Erestor, did you ever have a lover? I do not ask this question lightly. I do not want to infringe on your privacy, but I would like to know."

 

Erestor shook his head and the movement caused Glorfindel's fingers to brush his neck in a tender gesture. "This is the first time that I am in love. You are my first, Glorfindel, in every aspect of that word."

 

Glorfindel wiggled an eyebrow. "I am surprised to hear this."

 

"I had suitors," Erestor replied, explaining further, "But the time was never right. Nothing ever happened."

 

"Until now…"

 

"Yes, until now." Erestor looked at Glorfindel with uncertainty in his eyes. "I want to be your lover, but I am not certain I can take that step."

 

"Do not fret about that," Glorfindel suggested, feeling confident that Erestor would learn to accept more closeness and intimacy as the time passed by. All he needed to do was to be patient.

 

~~~

 

Erestor appreciated the fact that Glorfindel awarded him some private time in the bathroom. At first, the blond Elf had insisted he assist him during his bath, but Erestor had pointed out that Glorfindel should go by his own rooms to fetch a clean set of clothes and maybe some more personal items the warrior needed. In the end, Glorfindel had left and Erestor had entered the bathroom. After shedding the nightshirt, he shuffled in front of the large mirror and studied his reflection.

 

Now that he was naked, he turned and tried to study each inch of his body. What Glorfindel had said was true – all the wounds had closed. Some of them were in the process of fading, while the deeper once were still busy growing new skin.

 

Studying his face, Erestor saw that the cuts were gone. Only the faint echo of a few scars remained and he knew that at the rate he was healing that they would be gone in a few more days as well. He was well on his way to being whole again. But that was just on the outside.

 

Now that his body was on the mend, Erestor realized that he also needed to heal emotionally. That the Orcs had raped him had been their way to show their superiority and strength he understood. Elrond had explained to him that rape itself wasn't a crime born out of lust, but out of the struggle for power. They simply chose the method that would scare him the most. Rationally, he understood that and he had done his best to accept that he had been the victim in this strife for power. But now he needed to take the next step as well and this step frightened him.

 

That step involved allowing Glorfindel in further and accepting the warrior's caresses and kisses more easily. Glorfindel loved him and the warrior wanted to express those feelings. He surmised that as long as Glorfindel limited himself to kisses and caresses everything would be fine. /But there will come a day when he will want more./ And Erestor didn't know if he could ever engage in that sort of activity.

 

Glorfindel was the dominant one – the one in control of his life – and Erestor guessed the warrior would also want to be in control between the sheets as well. He had never told Elrond the details of the attack and he didn't plan on ever revealing them – neither to Elrond nor to Glorfindel. But the problem was that he vividly remembered the pain of being violated in such an intimate way. There was simply no way that he would ever allow Glorfindel to take him. /And how will he react once I tell him so?/

 

/You are acting like a fool,/ a voice whispered from the back of his mind. /Glorfindel was prepared to enter a bond without any physical contact, or have you forgotten that?/

 

He was probably overreacting, but he couldn't help but worry about this matter. /Glorfindel can not be content with kisses and caresses./

 

/Listen to yourself!/ There was that little voice again! /When Glorfindel took charge of your life, you did not think you could deal with being touched and now you crave his kisses and his touch! Give yourself time!/

 

/But…/ Erestor bowed his head. That little voice was right, but accepting the truth was hard on him. Looking at his hands, he wondered about the new soft skin and a smile was born on his lips, recalling how much Glorfindel loved to caress his fingers. /He loves me and I love him. I should let go of my fears and simply allow for this to happen./

 

"Are you brooding again, my love?" Glorfindel had entered the bathroom unnoticed by Erestor and now stood behind the dark-haired Elf. Taking in Erestor's appearance, he smiled. "Your skin is recovering." He hoped that he wasn't trespassing when he let a fingertip travel along Erestor's flank. He felt encouraged now that Erestor wasn't moving away and he proceeded to curl an arm around the other Elf's waist. "I love you, Erestor. All of you."

 

Those words brought tears to Erestor's eyes. "I find it hard to accept that. I know that you speak the truth and that you really love me, but…"

 

"You love me in turn, do you not, Erestor? Then why is it so hard to accept my love for you?" Glorfindel moved closer to Erestor and pulled the other Elf close to him. It felt good, being able to touch Erestor without having to worry that he would cause his beloved pain. Now that the skin had healed, Glorfindel found it much easier to reach out and embrace the one he loved.

 

"I do love you," Erestor replied, taking in their joined reflection in the mirror. "But everything happened so fast and so unexpected. I need a little more time to really understand what happened to me – us."

 

"You can have all the time you need." Glorfindel relished taking in the sight of Erestor's healed skin and he ran his fingers over the soft, baby-like skin of Erestor's chest. "I could join you for that bath, if you want me to," he offered.

 

"I would like that." Erestor cocked his head. "I can not deny that I am curious to see you naked, Glorfindel." The warrior had seen him naked already, but the warrior still had to reveal his physique to the Advisor.

 

"As you wish." Glorfindel pulled away from Erestor and moved over to the pool, which was already full with warm rose-scented water. He smiled, seeing that rose petals floated on the water. Another look told him that some of the roses had found a home in a vase on the windowsill. "Does this mean you like my gift?"

 

"I always loved their fragrance," Erestor replied as he waded into the pool. Once he was comfortably settled, he smiled and asked, "Do you plan on bathing fully clothed, Glorfindel?" The wicked expression in Glorfindel's eyes warned him that the warrior was up to something and it amazed him that the blond Elf was capable of stripping that quickly. Seconds later, Glorfindel entered the pool and sat down beside him.

 

"I would like to hold you, that is, if that does not cause you to feel uncomfortable." Glorfindel longingly looked Erestor in the eyes. "By the Valar, you grow lovelier each day."

 

"Lovely? Glorfindel, I am no blushing maiden!" Erestor moved closer into Glorfindel's arms.

 

"Yes, you are no maiden, but you are blushing, my dear Erestor." Glorfindel grinned now that Erestor's blush deepened. "I love holding you."

 

Erestor relaxed against Glorfindel and savored having the other Elf close.

 

Glorfindel smiled. He was hopeful that Erestor would accept more intimacy as time passed by. The fact that Erestor already felt comfortable enough to have him this close was a good sign.

 

~~~

 

The soft knock on the door to his rooms took Erestor by surprise. Who would be visiting with him? "Glorfindel, did you invite someone over?" The guilty look Glorfindel gave him answered this question at once. "You did… Who is it?"

 

"Erestor?"

 

Erestor recognized his visitor's voice. At one time, they had been very good friends. "You invited Lindir?"

 

Glorfindel shrugged his shoulders. "Not just Lindir, I am afraid. When I encountered your old friend, he was not alone. He was in the company of his lover." Glorfindel moved over to the doorway and pushed the door handle down. "I hoped you would not mind."

 

The pleading expression which Glorfindel gave him made Erestor go weak in the knees. Those large, blue eyes wound him around Glorfindel’s finger and he sighed. "I did not even know that Lindir had a lover." It showed just how much Lindir and he had been out of contact. "Do I know him?"

 

Glorfindel smiled, opened the door, and stepped aside to let Lindir and Melpomaen enter.

 

Erestor's first reaction was to pull his hood over his head, but he then realized that these robes came without a hood. He had also forgotten that his facial skin had healed and that he no longer looked repulsive. Making that transition took time. Thankfully he was so surprised at seeing Melpomaen at Lindir's side that he forgot about his worries. "Lindir… Melpomaen…" he whispered their names in welcome.

 

"Erestor, you look well!" Lindir was thrilled to see Erestor fare better. He let go of Melpomaen's hand and advanced on his long-lost friend. "I have missed your company!" He embraced Erestor, careful not to put any pressure on the mending skin. Breaking contact had never been his idea. It had been Erestor who had been determined to destroy their friendship.

 

"Lindir…" Erestor hated the way his voice trembled as he spoke his friend's name. "I missed you too." He completed the embrace and carefully hugged Lindir. "I missed you so much!"

 

Lindir forced back tears at hearing Erestor's soft voice. "I have so much to tell you, Erestor! I found love!" He gestured for Melpomaen to walk up to him, and once the Advisor stood at his side, he twined their fingers. "You know Melpomaen do you not, Erestor?"

 

Erestor nodded once. "We work together." Melpomaen and he'd had dealings these last few years, but had never exchanged any words in private. The young Advisor was a good match for the minstrel. "I can tell that the two of you are happy."

 

Melpomaen felt relieved now that Erestor seemed willing to accept this. "I will do everything I can to make Lindir happy." He had never really gotten to know Erestor and had always felt a bit intimidated by the Chief Advisor.

 

"Dinner is being served!" Glorfindel had directed the servants to place dinner on the table and had then dismissed them. "Are you hungry, my love?"

 

Erestor lowered his gaze and his nervousness showed when he moistened his lips. Glorfindel calling him 'my love' still felt awkward, especially now that they weren't alone. The warrior curled an arm around his shoulders and guided him over to the table. Erestor seated himself and peeked at Glorfindel's twinkling eyes. The blond Elf seemed pleased.

 

"Sit down, my friends!" Glorfindel gestured for Lindir and Melpomaen to sit down. He seated himself last and grinned contentedly. Yes, Erestor had accepted Lindir and Melpomaen's presence and it wasn't long until some easy conversation developed between the four of them. /This is another step Erestor has mastered./ He felt immensely proud of his beloved.

 

~~~

 

Erestor felt light-hearted and happy when Lindir and Melpomaen said their goodbyes. They had spent the evening talking and Lindir had even sung some of his favorite songs – songs which Erestor hadn't heard for years. "Thank you for visiting tonight, Lindir." The minstrel pulled him into his arms once more and Erestor hugged the white-haired Elf back. "I can tell that you are happy with Melpomaen. I am glad that you found love."

 

Lindir pulled back so he could look Erestor in the eye. "And I can tell that you are happy too. Love is in your eyes, Erestor. Glorfindel is doing you a world of good, my friend."

 

Lindir's words made Glorfindel smile and he moved closer to reclaim his beloved.

 

Lindir took the hint and took a step away from Erestor and back into Melpomaen's arms. "We will visit with you again shortly."

 

"We would like that," Glorfindel replied, still smiling.

 

Lindir and Melpomaen closed the door behind them and Glorfindel turned Erestor in the embrace so he could search the dark eyes. "Lindir is right – you look happy." But it was more than that – Erestor looked radiant and during the evening the scars had continued to fade. It was a pity that Erestor had shunned love, contact, and friendship for so long. If he had accepted his friends into his life after the attack, he might not have suffered as much as he had. "And I love you," Glorfindel added, toying with Erestor's long hair by winding it around his fingertips.

 

Erestor's eyes mirrored love and affection and made Glorfindel lean in closer. Pressing a kiss onto Erestor's lips, Glorfindel grew excited, feeling the lips and teeth part. He deepened the kiss, explored Erestor's mouth at leisure, and made certain that there was no pressure to continue on his part.

 

It was Erestor who eventually broke away in need of breath. "Glorfindel, I…"

 

Glorfindel cocked his head and smiled. "I understand." He used his hold on Erestor's waist to guide his beloved to the mirror and, standing in front of it, he smiled at their reflection. "Just look at you, Erestor."

 

And Erestor looked – truly looked – and saw the love that bound them.

 

~~~

 

That night, Erestor found himself in reversed roles. During the last few nights it had been Glorfindel who had guarded his sleep and had watched over him. But not this night. It started with Glorfindel whimpering softly and then the golden-haired Elf had begun to thrash.

 

"No… No!" Glorfindel shook his head and his arms moved wildly as if he was warding off an invisible enemy.

 

"Glorfindel, what is amiss?" Erestor recalled how Glorfindel had soothed him when he'd had a nightmare, but he wasn't certain the warrior would allow him to pull him into his arms. Glorfindel didn't seem to want anyone close, so all he could do was whisper. "Glorfindel, I am here. You are not alone. You are having a nightmare. Please wake up – for me, Glorfindel. Please."

 

Erestor's whispers finally registered with Glorfindel and his eyes focused on his beloved. Seeing the nervous expression in Erestor's eyes, Glorfindel forced himself to calm down. "I am sorry, Erestor… It has been some time since I last had such a violent nightmare." He had truly hoped that they had left him all together. Eager to reassure Erestor, Glorfindel established an embrace and shivered in his lover's arms, still fighting the memories.

 

"Glorfindel, I… I want to help… like you helped me… You can confide in me… if you want that." Erestor involuntarily held his breath. He hoped Glorfindel would accept his offer as he wasn't sure how he would react if the warrior rejected him.

 

"I do not want to burden you with my past." Glorfindel's fingertips brushed against Erestor's forehead, trying to smooth the wrinkles that had formed there.

 

"Glorfindel, please…"

 

Realizing that this was important to Erestor, Glorfindel made the decision to trust his beloved with his horrid memories. "I burn in my dreams, Erestor. I burn to death. The Balrog's claws tear into my skin and rip me apart and his breath burns me."

 

Glorfindel's words made Erestor tremble. "And you never talk about this?"

 

"Who should I entrust my memories to, Erestor? There never was anyone that I trusted in such a way. I only trusted Ecthelion and he is dead… Yes, I trust you, Erestor, please do not doubt that, but I did not want to burden you. I know you are fighting your own battle and adding my misery to yours was something I did not want to do. I had hoped that the nightmares would leave me alone."

 

"Are you afraid of fire?" It seemed a logical thing to ask.

 

Glorfindel's expression became worrisome. "I am not afraid of the fire in the fireplace, Erestor."

 

"That it is not what I meant and you know it," Erestor chided Glorfindel in a soft voice.

 

"I do not know, Erestor. I do not know how I will react when I face a fire." Glorfindel drew in a deep breath in order to calm himself. "The Balrog burning me is not the only nightmare I have. There is another one."

 

"Tell me." It felt odd to Erestor to be the strong one, to be holding Glorfindel and soothing him.

 

Glorfindel's eyes revealed fear and concern. "Do you really want to…" His voice trailed off now that Erestor was nodding his head. "All right then. There is this other nightmare in which the twins are in danger. Fire surrounds them and they plead with me to take them into safety. I want to move… I want to pick them up and carry them off into safety, but I feel paralyzed. I can not move and the fire is coming closer… It creeps up on us and then I am in danger too."

 

"How does the dream end?" Erestor stroked Glorfindel's long hair – he hoped that his touch would soothe the distraught Elf.

 

Glorfindel blinked. "I always wake up at that point. The last thing I remember is the fire crawling closer and the twins' screams ringing in my ears… That is when I wake up… I hate that nightmare even more than the one which features the Balrog."

 

"My love…" Erestor felt Glorfindel quiver against him and he realized it was because it was the first time that he addressed the other Elf thus. "I pray to the Valar that your nightmare will never come true."

 

"But what if it does? What if the twins call on me for help and I can not move?" Glorfindel's eyes swam with self-doubt and uncertainty.

 

"In that case I will save you, Glorfindel, and we will take the twins into safety together."

 

Glorfindel gulped. "You would face such a fierce fire for me?"

 

"Glorfindel, I would face certain death for you."

 

Glorfindel literally burst with love for Erestor and passionately claimed the other Elf's lips. Erestor had said exactly the right thing at the right time.

 

~~~

 

"Glorfindel? May I speak with you?" Elrond remained near the doorway and waited for either Erestor or Glorfindel to tell him to approach. He didn't want to infringe on their privacy now that the two Elves were curled up on the couch. His heart missed a beat out of joy at seeing that Erestor's skin still continued to improve. Erestor's facial skin was still healing, but the ugly wounds were gone. Only a few pink and reddish lines remained where the cuts had been.

 

"Elrond?" Glorfindel raised his head from Erestor's shoulder and smiled. Erestor was growing a bit tense in his arms, but Glorfindel was confident that his beloved's unease would lessen. They had settled on the couch: Glorfindel with his back against the comfort of the couch and Erestor in front of him nestled in his arms.

 

Erestor had pulled his knees to his chest and had wrapped his arms around his legs. He had felt comfortable in Glorfindel's arms, but that had changed when Elrond had unexpectedly appeared. He felt guilty, realizing only too well that he had neglected his friend. Elrond had always been there for him during these last three years and now he hadn't talked to the half-Elf for days.

 

"What brings you here?" Glorfindel gave Elrond a curious look. The half-Elf was dressed in luxurious formal robes. His auburn hair had been braided and Elrond was wearing his favorite hair clip, a butterfly clip which had been Elros' parting gift.

 

"Glorfindel, do not tell me that you forgot about the feast tonight." Elrond arched an eyebrow and realized at that moment that the blond Elf *had* forgotten about the celebration.

 

Glorfindel's eyes widened and he gasped. "Is that tonight?" He recalled Elrond's idea to celebrate his first anniversary in Imladris, but he had completely forgotten about it. He had been concentrating on Erestor's needs. "I forgot."

 

"What is tonight?" Feeling confused, Erestor's gaze shifted from Glorfindel to Elrond.

 

"Glorfindel's first anniversary celebration." Seeing realization dawn in Erestor's eyes, Elrond smiled. "And you are invited as well, Erestor. You have one hour to get ready. Everyone is already assembling in the Hall of Fire and Lindir even composed a song in your honor, Glorfindel. It would not do to be late."

 

Glorfindel sensed Erestor's growing discomfort and wondered about it. "What is amiss, my dear Erestor?"

 

"You should go. I will stay here and go to sleep." Erestor lowered his eyes now that Elrond had fixated his gaze upon him. "I can not accompany you, Glorfindel. I am sorry."

 

"And why is that?" A deep frown settled on Glorfindel's brow.

 

"You know…" Erestor tried to hide behind his long hair, but Elrond was still able to peek at his face.

 

"Erestor, your face is healing… The cuts are gone and all that is left are some faint scars. Those will go away in time as well." Elrond knew what was worrying Erestor and spoke his thoughts aloud. "No Elf will look at you in shock." Although not invited to approach, he advanced on the two Elves. He pulled up a chair and seated himself in front of Erestor. "Please look at me, my friend."

 

Erestor reluctantly raised his head and found comfort in the fact that Glorfindel was gently massaging his lower back. Glorfindel's touch no longer unnerved him and he actually craved the close contact. "Elrond," Erestor whispered in a pleading tone. "You know…"

 

"I know that you have been hiding for much too long. You know you are healing, Erestor, and I understand – to some degree – that you feel scared to reveal yourself to your friends. But Lindir, Melpomaen, my wife, and my sons hope you will attend. They want you there. And so do I." Elrond hoped his words registered with the distressed Advisor. "You are healing on the outside, Erestor. Do not forget that you need to heal emotionally as well."

 

"Glorfindel said the same thing," Erestor admitted in a soft voice. "But it remains difficult for me. I have been busy hiding from everyone for three years and now…"

 

"Now it is time to come out of hiding," Glorfindel finished for his beloved. "And tonight is the night that you will take that step." Erestor fastened his gaze on him and Glorfindel saw the fear and reluctance there. "You do not have to do this alone. Elrond and I will be there every step of the way."

 

Erestor released a deep sigh. Glorfindel and Elrond were right of course – he had to do this… He was just afraid of how he would react when everyone was staring at him.

 

~~~

 

Glorfindel's eyes grew big now that Erestor finally emerged from the bathroom. The Advisor had 'hidden' in there while changing into his formal robes. "You look…" The words escaped him. How could he ever express how stunning Erestor looked?

 

"Do you like it at all? I never wore these robes before." Erestor nervously shuffled his feet. The robes had been a gift from Celebrían many years ago.

 

"You look ravishing, my love." And that was an understatement! The under tunic, made of the finest silk, was slate green and lined with tiny silver ornaments. The outer robes were made of a heavy velvet and the midnight blue color complimented the green. "Is that mithril?" Glorfindel reached for the outer robes and his fingers explored the delicate embroidery.

 

"I think it is." Erestor smiled; he was relieved that Glorfindel thought that the robes looked good on him. He had grown used to wearing black or grey robes and wearing colors like green and blue made him feel insecure.

 

Glorfindel took another step toward Erestor and pulled him into an embrace. "Will you braid your hair?" He wouldn't mind braiding it – the mere thought of running his fingers through the long strands brought him pleasure.

 

Erestor answered Glorfindel's question by letting his hair fall in front of his face and hiding behind the dark curtain. "I do not think so. I would have preferred for these robes to come with a hood, but…"

 

"You do not have to hide any longer," Glorfindel reminded Erestor that things had changed. He once more turned Erestor around so they were facing the large mirror. "Your face is no longer scarred."

 

Erestor gingerly raised his eyes and studied his expression. "I know that the cuts are gone, but… it has only been one week, Glorfindel. I need more time to accept that things have changed." Erestor reached for his gloves out of habit and was about to slip them on when Glorfindel rested a hand on his, stopping him. Erestor's gaze questioningly met Glorfindel's.

 

"Your hands have healed. Even the scars are gone. You do not need those gloves any longer, my heart." Glorfindel liked the way they looked together. Erestor was wearing cool winter colors, where he was dressed in warm earth tones ranging from dark red to a golden yellow. They were as different as they could be and yet something connected them – love connected them. 

 

"I feel safer with my gloves on," Erestor objected. Changing his way of thinking was hard on him. "I am used to hiding myself."

 

"Please leave the gloves here, my love. You do not need them. I will lend you all the strength you need. I will not let go of your hand, I promise." Glorfindel's fingers twined with Erestor's and he squeezed – tightly this time as he no longer had to worry about damaging the skin. "Erestor, I have been meaning to ask you one more thing."

 

"What is that?"

 

"Will you dance with me? I want to hold you and whirl you about." Glorfindel knew Lindir well enough to realize that the minstrel had planned something special for this evening now that Erestor would return among their midst.

 

"Dance? Dance with you?" Erestor gasped. "Glorfindel, I have not danced in years!"

 

"Erestor, will you dance with me? Please? I am not beyond shameless begging, you know." Glorfindel swept Erestor's hair aside and pressed a kiss onto the long delicate neck.

 

Erestor sighed. "I will dance with you." He heard himself speak the words, but couldn't believe he had really said them! Dancing was the last thing he wanted to engage in! "How do you do that? Make me agree to anything?"

 

"It is my natural charm," Glorfindel whispered in a teasing voice. "You will grow used to it."

 

"Glorfindel, I…" Erestor looked Glorfindel in the eye. It was time to be completely honest. "I am afraid. I am afraid of how they will react upon seeing me."

 

Glorfindel loved Erestor for being so honest with him. It showed just how much the Advisor trusted him. "My love, they will welcome you back in their midst. They probably never wanted to break off contact. Lindir told me that he tried to get in touch with you after the attack, but he also mentioned that you avoided him at all cost." Glorfindel moistened his lips, stalling. "I do not believe that they ever thought you hideous. I am afraid that it was only you who thought of yourself in that way."

 

"Do you really think that?" Erestor no longer protested and allowed Glorfindel to pull him toward the doorway. "You *will* stay at my side, will you not, Glorfindel? Please do not leave me alone tonight. I *need* you!"

 

Glorfindel brought Erestor's hand to his lips and pressed a kiss onto the back. "I will be right there – holding your hand."

 

~~~

 

Erestor felt anxious now that the door to the Hall of Fire opened to admit them. The sounds coming from inside the Hall told him that a large group of Elves had gathered there. His nervousness increased and so did the force of his grip on Glorfindel's hand. "Whatever you do, do not let go."

 

Glorfindel looked his beloved in the eye and nodded his head once. "I will not. Trust me."

 

"Glorfindel! I am glad you could join us!" Elrond advanced on the couple. A bright smile illuminated his features now that he found Erestor at Glorfindel's side. "And you are most welcome here, Erestor."

 

The whispers the crowd produced died down as the gathered Elves heard Elrond address the Chief Advisor. The majority of the Elves stared openly at Erestor and their eyes widened at seeing Erestor's face as good as healed. Soft cheering started and grew louder and louder. Elrond's household were chanting Glorfindel and Erestor's names and smiles formed on their faces now that the Chief Advisor had returned to their midst. Many of them wondered about Erestor's unexpected recovery, but the eldest and wisest of them saw the love in Glorfindel's eyes and instinctively knew what had helped Erestor heal.

 

"Erestor!" Celebrían was delighted to find her friend had joined the feast and approached Erestor. Elrohir trotted behind her and dragged his twin along.

 

"My Lady." Erestor inclined his head in greeting. Feeling all those looks directed at him made him feel even more panicked, but he managed to hide his uneasiness.

 

"Erestor…" Elrohir whispered the name and stepped up to the dark-haired Elf. Elladan followed suit and the twins now stood in front of Erestor, giving him curious looks.

 

Elrond and Celebrían stood behind their sons and watched with curiosity, wondering what the twins were up to.

 

"Down…" Elrohir clawed at the soft material of Erestor's robes and tugged hard.

 

Erestor wavered at first, but then he lowered himself onto his heels. "What is it, Elrohir?"

 

Smiling smugly, the twin nodded once. Erestor could really tell them apart! "Your face no longer looks that odd."

 

"My injuries have healed," Erestor answered as he tried to explain the changes to the Elflings.

 

"You no longer hurt then?" Elladan asked. The twin took a step forward to study Erestor's face better.

 

"I no longer hurt," Erestor confirmed, feeling touched that they worried about him.

 

"Can I sit on your lap tonight?" Elrohir pushed Elladan aside and gave Erestor a pleading look.

 

"I want to sit on his lap too!" Elladan pouted now that Elrohir had voiced his request first.

 

Glorfindel decided it was time to intervene as he sensed Erestor's agitation. Although Erestor loved the twins, finding them this close and practically begging for his attention was something the Advisor wasn't used to. "I will let you sit on mine, Elladan, how about that?"

 

Elladan seriously considered the offer and then nodded his head. "But later on we will switch!" he declared, addressing his twin.

 

Not wanting his brother to feel leave out, Elrohir nodded his head. "Of course." He would always share with Elladan.

 

Trying to make it up to Elladan that Elrohir would sit on Erestor's lap first, Glorfindel picked the Elfling up and settled him on his shoulders. Elladan cooed and used the warrior's golden hair as reins, steering the adult toward the head table.

 

Now Erestor was left to deal with Elrohir, who gave him a look full of expectation. In the end, Erestor lifted the Elfling and settled him against his hip, carrying Elrohir like he had seen their mother do.

 

Elrond and his wife exchanged pleased looks and followed their friends to their table.

 

Once everyone was seated, and only Elrond remained standing, the half-Elf addressed his household. "It has been one year since Glorfindel arrived at Imladris. In that year, he has become a valuable friend and we trust him to keep our borders safe." Turning toward Glorfindel, Elrond raised his glass to toast. "May your life here be happy and filled with love."

 

While Glorfindel smirked at hearing Elrond's words, Erestor blushed. Glorfindel raised his goblet in reply, "Thank you my Lord for making me feel a part of your family and you are right – my life here will be filled with love." In order to stress his words, Glorfindel raised Erestor's hand and pressed a kiss onto its back.

 

Murmurs swept through the Hall. The Elves who had suspected that an intimate relationship had formed between Erestor and Glorfindel now saw their suspicions confirmed, and the Elves who hadn't realized the nature of that relationship now understood as well.

 

"He kissed your hand!" Elrohir giggled at Erestor. "Ada does that to Nana as well."

 

"That means they love each other, silly," Elladan replied, trying to duplicate their father's tone. He sat comfortably on Glorfindel's lap and sipped his apple juice.

 

Elrohir continued to giggle as Erestor stared at Glorfindel in disbelief. "Yes, he kissed your hand." More giggling followed.

 

What in Elbereth's name did Glorfindel think he was doing? Erestor blinked; why had Glorfindel done that? Didn't the warrior realize that by kissing his hand he had announced their relationship to Elrond's household? Why would Glorfindel do that?

 

Glorfindel saw the wonder in Erestor's eyes and pressed another kiss onto the back of the Advisor's hand. "I want them all to know. I do not intend to hide our love, Erestor."

 

Erestor lowered his gaze and was unable to stop himself from growing flustered. He had known that this evening would be embarrassing, but he had never expected Glorfindel to do *that*.

 

"I displeased you. Why?" Glorfindel frowned. Elladan had grown quiet on his lap and the Elfling seemed to be holding his breath in anticipation of Erestor's answer.

 

"You could do so much better than me," Erestor whispered – his words were only audible for Glorfindel and unfortunately the twins. "I have so little left to offer."

 

"You are so very wrong, my dear Erestor." Glorfindel was determined to prove his beloved wrong, but in order to do so he needed his space back. "Elladan, Elrohir, would you mind sitting on your Ada's lap for a little while?"

 

The twins looked at each other and then nodded simultaneously. They began to climb across Erestor and Glorfindel's laps until they ended up on their father's. Elrond immediately wrapped his arms around them and hugged them.

 

"You have given me what I always wanted, Erestor. You gave me your love." Resolutely, Glorfindel rose from his chair and pulled Erestor along with him. "Lindir?"

 

Lindir nodded his head to show he understood what the warrior was asking him. He had overheard most of the couple's conversation and now turned toward the rest of the minstrels, signaling it was time to start playing their songs.

 

Melpomaen had found a place close to Lindir. The minstrel was playing the harp tonight and the young Advisor had settled down at Lindir's feet, resting his head against his lover's knee. Listening to the music that now flowed from Lindir's hands, he closed his eyes and dreamt that he was leading Lindir onto the dance floor like Glorfindel was doing right now with Erestor.

 

"What are you doing?" Erestor had thought that Glorfindel couldn't shock him more, but now that the warrior was holding him tight, it became obvious that the golden-haired Elf was bent on collecting the dance he had promised Glorfindel.

 

Glorfindel sighed; Erestor was once more trying to hide behind a curtain of raven hair. "Please look at me, my love." The music was slow and enticing and Glorfindel moved to it, leading their dance.

 

"They are staring at me." Erestor reluctantly raised his gaze to look at Glorfindel.

 

"They are looking at us because they see the love we share. Look at their eyes, Erestor." Glorfindel told himself to be patient – Erestor needed time to understand and accept that his life had changed.

 

Erestor peeked at the faces of the Elves surrounding them and found Glorfindel's words true. There were no expressions of loathing on their faces. Instead, they stared at him with love and admiration. "I do not understand any of this."

 

"You will – in the end." Glorfindel guided Erestor's head onto his shoulder and Glorfindel stole another dance when the Advisor didn't seem to realize – or care – that the first song had come to an end.

 

Elrond watched his best friends dance and, seeing them move together like that, caused a warm sensation in his heart. His wife's hand settled on his and he caressed her fingers. He felt grateful that the Valar had graced his life – and Erestor's – with true love.

 

"Elrond, do you know those two Elves?" Celebrían tilted her head in the direction she wanted her husband to look in.

 

Elrond followed the direction of his wife's gaze and his eyes narrowed in thought. At the back of the Hall two Elves danced, slowly, sensually. One of them was dark-haired and possessed feline green eyes. The other Elf was a vision of white and gold and a glow seemed to envelop his form. "I do not know them." He would most certainly remember such a magnificent pair!

 

~~~

 

"You *had* to drag me here!" Námo tried to sound displeased, but failed to pull it off. His brother could be a nuisance at times, but he never grew irritated with him. At the moment, Lórien was busy whirling him over the dance floor and Námo had to pay attention to where he was placing his feet. Lórien's essence consisted of light and gold where his being was filled with darkness and that made them opposites in every aspect of the word.

 

His brother's chuckling took him aback and he wondered once more why Lórien had decided to join him in his meddling where the Firstborn were concerned. It was almost like his brother was looking for reasons to be close to him.

 

"Do not pretend to be such a grouch," Lórien replied as he continued to chuckle. "You know you are a romantic at heart! You revel in the presence of the Firstborn and you delight in seeing Erestor and Glorfindel happily in love!"

Námo studied his brother extensively. What was he missing?

 

~~~

 

Erestor surprised himself by easily accepting Lindir's embrace in front of the remaining crowd. As he still tired easily, Glorfindel had called an end to their evening and the warrior was eager to escort him back to his rooms.

 

"Melpomaen and I will visit with you shortly," Lindir promised, gently squeezing Erestor's form. "You have no idea how happy I am to see you out of pain, my dear friend."

 

"I think I know," Erestor hinted. He still remembered the way Glorfindel had reacted when his wounds had begun to close.

 

Lindir eventually released Erestor from his embrace. The minstrel whispered to Glorfindel, "Take good care of him, Glorfindel. Erestor is very dear to me."

 

"Rest assured, Lindir. Erestor is also *very* dear to me." Glorfindel's fingers were still twined with Erestor's and he pulled his love close. He wanted to guide Erestor toward the doorway when two little, extremely sleepy Elflings sauntered up to them.

 

Elladan's eyes were already half-closed, but the Elfling was still awake enough to say his temporary goodbyes. "Hug us?" He would never ask for a hug for himself – Elrohir was always on his mind as well.

 

Glorfindel momentarily had to release Erestor's hand in order to lift Elladan and hug him. Giving Erestor a look, he nodded his head and hoped that his beloved would get the hint.

 

Erestor understood and gingerly lifted Elrohir in his arms and bestowed a gentle hug onto the Elfling. Elrohir's hands patted his back and that gesture made his eyes swim. The twins' love had also helped him heal, he realized that now – their love and acceptance.

 

They put the Elflings onto their feet again and watched how Elrond gathered his sons in his arms, cradling them against his chest. Elrond smiled at Erestor and said, "I have missed my Chief Advisor. Will you offer me your counsel again tomorrow?"

 

Erestor nodded his head once. He felt strong and confident enough to return to his duties. "I will."

 

Glorfindel beamed with happiness and gathered Erestor's hand in his again. "Come with me now. You need to rest. Work must wait until tomorrow."

 

Erestor followed Glorfindel to the doorway, but Elrohir unexpectedly called out his name, and he looked at the Elfling from over his shoulder. Both twins were waving at him in goodbye and Erestor raised his hand in order to wave back at them.

 

"Night, Erestor," Elladan whispered in a sleepy voice. "Have nice dreams."

 

Glorfindel smiled; he would make certain that Erestor had nice dreams.

 

~~~

 

Erestor wavered – he had removed his outer robes, under tunic, and his house shoes. He brushed his hair and then reached for the jar with salve, intending to smooth ointment onto his skin. But then his movement halted. Even the scars had faded and he had a hard time pointing out those areas of his body which had been injured. The truth was that he didn't need the salve any more.

 

Standing naked in front of the mirror, Erestor wondered if he should slip into a nightshirt. Or should he join Glorfindel naked between the sheets? Erestor drew in a deep breath and made his decision not to slip into his nightshirt. Stepping into the bedroom, his gaze immediately located Glorfindel. The warrior sat on the bed. He was naked and his long, golden hair cascaded down his back and chest. He truly was an enchanting sight to behold and he still wondered why Glorfindel loved him.

 

Glorfindel raised his eyes and smiled a bit shakily as he hadn't expected Erestor to be naked. "Do you want me to fetch you a nightshirt?"

 

"No." Erestor determinedly advanced on the bed and sat down next to Glorfindel. "I am not afraid of you, Glorfindel. Neither am I afraid of being naked with you – or being touched by you for that matter." Erestor forced himself to continue. "There is only one thing I am afraid of."

 

"And what is that?" Glorfindel felt honored that Erestor entrusted his worries to him.

 

Erestor lowered his gaze. He didn't think he could speak the words while looking Glorfindel in the eyes. "I love you, Glorfindel, and I crave your touch more than I ever thought possible, but…"

 

"But what?" Glorfindel gathered Erestor's hand in his and rubbed the limb.

 

"I can never allow you to take me." There, he had said it and now he expected the world to come in crashing around him. "There was just so much pain, Glorfindel."

 

Glorfindel blinked. "That is your greatest fear? But Erestor, why do you think I would want to take you in that way when I know what you have been through?"

 

"I…" Erestor's mouth went dry and he nervously shifted on the bed. "I can not picture you on the bottom, Glorfindel. You are always in control. You are so strong! You are a warrior and…"

 

"And you think a warrior would not enjoy being claimed by the one he loves more than life itself?"

 

Glorfindel's words made Erestor look up sharply. "You can not be serious!" Glorfindel couldn't be saying what he thought he was saying!

 

"Erestor, I fully understand and accept that you are setting boundaries and I will never force you to engage in an act you are uncomfortable with – no, let me rephrase that – an act you are terrified of. Why would I do that? I love you too much to cause you pain."

 

Erestor gulped. "Does that mean…?"

 

"That I hope you will take me one day? Oh yes, I do. I want to make love with you, but only the way you feel comfortable with." Glorfindel placed a finger beneath Erestor's chin and lifted the handsome face toward him. "I love you, Erestor, just the way you are." Seeing tears slide down Erestor's cheeks didn't surprise him. This was a very emotional moment for the both of them and Glorfindel pulled Erestor close. Holding him tightly, Glorfindel let him cry and, when no more tears were forthcoming, he eased Erestor onto the mattress. Rocking Erestor slowly, he watched how the eyes took on a vacant expression. "I love you, Erestor. I will stand at your side and support you no matter what the future will bring."

 

~~~

 

"Your behavior vexes me, Lórien." Námo frowned. For some reason Lórien had accompanied him into his Halls of Waiting and the other Vala remained close and continued to dance, although his arms were empty now. Námo watched his brother and not for the first time did he feel jealous of Lórien's carefree nature. Lórien didn't carry the burden he did and therefore his essence was lighthearted and shone with a bright light. "Why are you still here?" Lórien had joined him in his Halls before, but his brother had never acted in such a cheerful way. It was almost like Lórien was challenging him, but Námo was at a loss as to what that challenge was about.

 

"You always act so gloomy, Námo. Why is that?" Lórien came to a halt in front of his brother and smiled at him. They had chosen to remain in the form of the Firstborn after quickly leaving the party. Elrond had begun to advance on them and they had seen the questions in the grey eyes. It had been time to depart and they had gone to the Halls instead.

 

"In case you had not noticed, brother, this is a gloomy place." Námo seated himself on his 'throne'. The chair had been placed on a pedestal and it was in this room where he greeted the new souls. Although Lórien's appearance hadn't changed, Námo had taken on the guise he preferred for the souls to see him in. His long, black hair had streaks of grey and white in them and the eyes resembled a cracked mirror. They were dark as well, but at the same time a silver light shone from them. He was dressed in grey robes and wore a warm cloak made from furs.

 

Lórien sighed, exasperated. "It is a gloomy place because you choose it to be like that. You have the power to change that."

 

"This is what the souls are used to and feel comfortable with. Their well-being comes first." Námo rose from his chair and began to pace the Hall.

 

Lórien leaned against the wall and studied the other Vala. "Námo, you said that you allowed Glorfindel to return to Arda because you wanted him to experience true love… How about you? Have you ever known true love?" This was a touchy subject at best as he knew that there was little love and passion between Vairë and his brother. But then again, why should things be different for his brother when Lórien himself had agreed to a loveless union? The truth was that there was little ardor in both their marriages.

 

Námo snorted. Why was his brother asking him such odd questions? "True love is something meant for the Firstborn, not for us."

 

"And why is that?" The Lord of Dreams, Visions, and Passion advanced on his brother. "Is our happiness of less worth than theirs?"

 

Námo's expression grew even more confused. "You are not making any sense."

 

"I am not?" Lórien cocked his head. "Are you merely pretending that you do not understand or are you really that stupid?"

 

Námo glared at his younger brother. "Did you really call me stupid just now?"

 

"Námo, you and I are as close as anyone can be and you still do not understand what I am trying to tell you?" His glistering, golden eyes fastened on his brother's face. "Do you not know how much I want to chase away this dark void that surrounds you and fill it with love, joy, and happiness instead?"

 

"But…" Námo was finally catching on. "But we are kin!"

 

"Námo, we belong to the Valar. We are the Fëanturi, the masters of spirits. Do you really think rules apply to us?" Lórien chuckled at seeing shock in his brother's glass-like eyes. "Would you deny us what you gifted to Erestor and Glorfindel?"

 

"Lórien, you are only partly right. Yes, we belong to the Valar and no, rules do not apply to us, but the Firstborn look to us to set examples. Although I love you dearly, we have to set the *right* example."

 

"What is right and what is wrong?" Lórien shook his head. "That works two ways, brother. If we were to act upon this we would still be setting an example – a good example, do you not agree? Is the love between two males – or two of the Valar – worth any less than the love between a male and a female? I did not think you were that prejudiced, but it seems I was wrong." Lórien felt disappointed and couldn't hide his disillusionment from his brother. "You are not the only one who can foresee the future, brother-mine. The Imladris heirs are also inclined this way. During their lives there will never be another as their souls are one."

 

Námo nodded his head once. He had seen their future as well.

 

"Do you look upon them less favorably because they are males?" Lórien asked, sensing his brother's bewilderment. "I know that it is not commonplace for twins to become lovers – neither for brothers, but…" He had hoped that Námo of all people would understand his love for him, but he had been wrong. "I had better leave you now. I do not want you to grow cross with me."

 

Námo was about to tell his brother to stay so they could discuss this further, but he waited too long. When he finally spoke, Lórien was gone and, at last, Námo realized just how lonely he felt without having his younger brother close. 

 

~~~

 

Glorfindel smirked; Erestor was rubbing his lower body against him. This was the first time that the dark-haired Elf was aroused and the soft mews which left Erestor's lips made Glorfindel hard in turn. There was just one problem – he really wanted to show Erestor the pleasure his lover had missed out on so far, but he was reluctant to touch his beloved without having received Erestor's explicit permission first.

 

That problem seemed to solve itself because Erestor unexpectedly opened his eyes to look at him. He knew what he had been doing and was about to apologize for rubbing so wantonly against Glorfindel when he saw the warm and inviting expression in those blue eyes. Keeping silent instead, Erestor probed Glorfindel's eyes deeper.

 

"Good morning, my love," Glorfindel murmured, starting off their conversation. "Am I right to assume that you feel comfortable in my embrace?" They still lay face to face and Glorfindel relished holding the lithe Elf close.

 

Erestor blushed weakly. "I do."

 

"I thought as much. Your body led me to believe so." Teasingly, slowly, Glorfindel leaned in closer and kissed Erestor. His lover moaned into his mouth and Glorfindel rubbed Erestor's lower back in the hope to relax him further. "I would like to do more than kissing," Glorfindel offered, hoping he had correctly interpreted Erestor's needy expression. "But only if you want that as well."

 

Erestor, while feeling excited, was also nervous. "What do you want to do, Glorfindel?"

 

"I would like to bring you to orgasm, if you would allow me to do so that is." Glorfindel patiently waited for Erestor's reply, reminding himself that this was new territory for his lover.

 

Erestor's nervousness increased. "In what way?"

 

/He looks even more desirable when he blushes,/ Glorfindel thought and he wanted nothing more than to give Erestor the bliss the Advisor had been denied for so long. "What way would please you?"

 

"I do not know, Glorfindel." In an even softer voice, a blushing Erestor added, "I am not experienced in love making, remember?"

 

Glorfindel nodded once and ran his fingers down the long, ebony hair. "I could bring you to orgasm by using my hand, but I would prefer to do so with my mouth because I can give you more pleasure that way."

 

Erestor released a shuddering sigh. "Glorfindel, I am not sure I can return the favor."

 

"You do not have to, my love." Glorfindel pressed another kiss onto Erestor's lips and, this time, his tongue pressed against his lover's teeth which parted to allow him inside. He deepened the kiss while his hand stole lower to Erestor's groin. "Just enjoy, Erestor, and do not worry about returning the favor. I have the feeling I will come with you." The mere fact that he was touching Erestor in a way he had never believed possible was enough to cause a delicious sensation in his groin.

 

Glorfindel's fingers first only hovered above Erestor's member, but then the fingers curled around his hard flesh. He stroked his lover slowly, giving him a chance to savor this experience. Erestor kissed Glorfindel back and this time his tongue ventured into the warrior's mouth, exploring like his lover had done a moment ago.

 

The fact that Erestor was now taking an active part in their lovemaking encouraged Glorfindel to speed up his strokes. "Do you like this?" Glorfindel whispered the words in between kisses.

 

"I do…" Erestor's reply was nothing more than a whisper.

 

Glorfindel chuckled and then released Erestor's lips. Moving lower, he kissed his way down Erestor's throat. He always monitored his lover's reaction closely, ready to stop the sensual seduction if Erestor grew uncomfortable. But his lover arched into his hand and another mewl left the trembling lips. Glorfindel continued his journey down Erestor's body. Encountering a hard nipple, he suckled the nub and then flicked it with his tongue.

 

"By the Valar…" Erestor began to pant now that Glorfindel's touches were growing bolder. Nothing could have prepared him for the moment his lover's tongue lapped at the head of his erection. The sensation of a wet tongue moving against the slit caused Erestor to whip his hips forward.

 

Glorfindel took his lover's length into his mouth and, when Erestor thrust, he relaxed his throat and took him as deep as he could. Shifting on the bed, he moved Erestor into the desired position and knelt between his lover's parted legs. Glorfindel slid his hands beneath Erestor's bottom, lifted his lover's lower body, and then sucked the hard flesh in earnest.

 

"Oh…" Erestor stared at the ceiling – unseeing and uncaring. All that mattered right now was reaching orgasm.

 

Glorfindel's groin tightened and he reached orgasm while guiding Erestor to his climax. He moaned around his lover's hard flesh and unconsciously drove himself even deeper onto Erestor's shaft.

 

Glorfindel's breath and moans vibrated around his erection and Erestor succumbed to the pleasure. Arching his back, Erestor pressed deeper into the mattress and let go.

 

Erestor's essence shot from the slit and hit the back of Glorfindel's throat. Like a cat licking up cream, Glorfindel milked Erestor's cock dry and, when the hard flesh slipped from his lips, he treated the softening member with catlike licks. Purring, he crawled closer to Erestor. Glorfindel placed his hands on either side of Erestor's head and smiled at his lover. "You liked that too."

 

"I did…"

 

The sated expression in Erestor's eyes made Glorfindel feel all warm inside. This action had showed just how much Erestor trusted him and it led Glorfindel to believe that they would have a fulfilling sex life in time, something Erestor had said would be impossible. "You made me come, Erestor."

 

"I did?" Erestor blinked. He felt too lazy to push himself upright to see if Glorfindel had spoken the truth. "I am sorry that I was not a more active participant. I wanted to bring you to orgasm as well."

"But you did!" Glorfindel lowered himself onto his elbows and gazed into Erestor's dilated pupils. "You are wonderful, Erestor." To his amusement, Erestor's blush deepened.

 

"No, I should be saying those words to you. *You* are wonderful, Glorfindel. I did nothing…"

 

Glorfindel interrupted him. "What you did, Erestor, was much more important than what I did. You decided to trust me." He gazed longingly into his lover's eyes and rubbed the tip of his nose against Erestor's, an action which made both of them giggle. "I love you," Glorfindel whispered against Erestor's lips.

 

Still too dazed from the experience they had just shared, all Erestor could do was stare back and nod.

 

~~~

 

"I searched for you for a long time. Why did you come here?" Námo approached Lórien. His brother had seated himself on a rock and was watching Glorfindel and his men swim in the Bruinen. As his brother had chosen to be invisible, Námo had followed Lórien's example. Glorfindel and the Imladris' guards had no idea they were being watched by the Valar.

 

"I have grown weary of my existence, Námo. I find myself limited in ways I never felt restricted in before. We belong to the Valar and yet the pleasures of the flesh were never ours to taste."

 

Námo seated himself on the rock next to his younger brother. His gray and black hair seemed to reach for Lórien's golden strands and the locks twined. Reaching out like this was Námo's way of showing his younger brother that he had calmed and was ready to discuss the matter in a rational way. But was that what his younger brother wanted? Did Lórien want him to be calm and rational?

 

"Do you long to experience those pleasures of the flesh then?" Passion, touching, and sex were alien concepts to the Valar. Yes, they knew the Firstborn indulged in those pleasures, but as they were made of spirit, it surprised Námo that his brother now longed for such physical closeness.

 

Lórien nodded his head once. "I do. You caused this turmoil in me, Námo. It did not register with me that I missed something until you started to meddle with Erestor and Glorfindel's relationship. It was then that I realized that I missed something fundamental in my existence."

 

"Why did you come to me with this? We are brothers, Lórien."

 

"Who else should I go to? My wife? Like yours, my marriage is one of the spirit, not of the body." Lórien tilted his head and peeked at his older brother. "I trust you. I have loved you my entire existence. You are a part of me and you know it. I felt safe enough to go to you and confide in you. Now I wished I had not done that."

 

Námo chose his next words very carefully. "I feel honored that you would come to me, Lórien, and what you say is true – we are one in many ways."

 

"But you are not willing to do this for me." Lórien sounded resigned. "All this talk of true love and then you back down."

 

"True love…" Námo considered the concept. "I do not think such a thing applies to us. We are made of the same spirit. In some ways our love is deeper than Erestor and Glorfindel's can ever be."

 

Lórien gingerly searched his brother's gaze. "Do you love me enough to do this for me?"

 

"What is 'this', Lórien? What do you want from me? What do you need? What is this really about?"

 

"I want to experience what these Firstborn have. I want to make love just once in my existence. Námo, we are old, so old. We have seen so much and eternity is our destiny. I need a new experience. I need to *feel* for a change." Lórien shook his head in wonder. "Do you not crave a new thrill, brother? Something new that will energize you?"

 

Námo was still considering Lórien's words when he asked, "What do you have in mind?"

 

Lórien's essence burned even brighter as he heard the agreeable tone in his brother's voice. "We could take the guise of the Firstborn and limit ourselves to the ways of their bodies. We could forsake our powers for a little while and engage in the act of lovemaking."

 

Lórien's voice had grown enthusiastic and he was wildly gesturing to stress his words. Námo loved seeing that spark flare inside his younger brother and was tempted to give in. "And this would be a one-time affair?"

 

Lórien phrased his answer diplomatically. "Maybe… maybe not. It depends."

 

"On what?"

 

"It depends on how much we like making love. Námo, we do not know what to expect… If we like it as much as the Firstborn do, why not do it again?" He gave his older brother a hopeful look. "What do you say? Are you willing to try?"

 

Námo sensed his brother's emotions – Lórien's hopes and at the same time his brother's fear of rejection. In the end, he said, "I will give you this. I am willing to do this for you, but…"

 

"But?" Lórien leaned in closer. His eyes glittered with excitement as he waited for his brother to end his sentence.

 

"But we will do this on my terms. Agreed?"

 

"Agreed!" Lórien eagerly nodded his head, although he had no idea what he had just agreed to.

 

~~~

 

"Ada? Can we play with Erestor? Please?" Elladan and Elrohir had snuck into Elrond's study and had remained unnoticed until they peeked at the adults from over the rim of the desk. "Please?" Elladan gave his father his most pleading look.

 

Elrond laughed warmly at seeing his offspring trying to wind him around their little fingers. "It does not matter to the two of you that Erestor and I have work to catch up on, does it?"

 

Elrohir shook his head and began to hoist himself up onto Erestor's lap. The Advisor gave him a stunned look and Elrohir used the adult's confusion to settle comfortably on the lap. "We can play hide and seek."

 

"Or we could play a guessing game." Elladan couldn't stay behind now that Elrohir had taken possession of Erestor's lap and he 'retaliated' by climbing onto Elrond's.

 

"Or we could go for a swim in the Bruinen!" Although they were still very young, their mother had already taught them to swim. Celebrían had thought it fundamental that the twins knew how to swim as they lived close to the Bruinen. "I know that Glorfindel is also there," Elrohir added. "If we ask really nice he will probably join us!"

 

"Well, it is an awfully warm day," Elrond commented, agreeing with his sons and terrifying his Chief Advisor. The look Erestor gave him stated, 'You can not be seriously contemplating to go for a swim!' Elrond frowned and wondered just why Erestor disliked the idea that much. "How about a picnic?"

 

"Yes, a picnic!" Elladan applauded his father for having that idea.

 

"First, we will swim and then we will have our picnic!" Elrohir decreed, eagerly nodding his head.

 

"I do not think I will be joining you," Erestor hedged, trying to find a way out of this situation. "I still need to catch up on a lot of correspondence."

 

But Elrond wouldn't have it. He had learned how to handle Erestor by watching Glorfindel. "No, you will accompany us."

 

Although Elrond hadn't exactly phrased it as an order, Erestor clearly heard the commanding tone. Elrond wouldn't accept a no. He raised his gaze and gave Elrond a look that pleaded, 'Must I? Really?' Elrond nodded again and, in Erestor's line of thinking, confirmed his doom.

 

"Erestor, fetch some towels. My sons and I will visit the kitchen in the meantime and collect some food. We will meet you in ten minutes on the courtyard and do not be late!" Elrond raised and waved a finger at his Advisor in warning.

 

Erestor resigned himself to his fate. It didn't look like he was getting out of this one.

 

~~~

 

"Erestor?" Elladan looked up at the adult. Erestor felt tense and the eyes simmered with unease. "What is wrong? You can swim or…?" He was walking next to Erestor and had gathered the older Elf's hand in his.

 

Elrohir was seated high upon Elrond's shoulders, but still heard his twin utter those words in concern. Bending forward, he whispered into his father's ear, "Does Erestor not want to play?"

 

"Yes, I can swim, little one." Erestor glared at Elrond. He couldn't believe that the half-Elf was doing this to him. /Regardless of what he threatens me with I refuse to take my clothes off!/ Although his skin had healed and no longer showed any disfigurement, Erestor's mind still struggled to accept that he was whole again. It was a process that happened gradually and he needed to make that truth his, time and time again.

 

"I believe he wants to play," Elrond belatedly answered his son's question. "Erestor just does not know that yet." That answer earned him another one of Erestor's sharp glares, but he didn't give in and returned the look.

 

"Erestor?" Glorfindel, who had been swimming, came to a stop and raised his hand in greeting. Seeing his lover here at the Bruinen was a most welcome sight. Like Elrond, he felt that Erestor should be out in the open more often. "I am over here."

 

The sight of Glorfindel's muscular chest rising above the water made Erestor gasp. Droplets clung to the pectorals and little rivulets of water flowed down the warrior's shoulders. The alluring sight made him once more wonder just what Glorfindel saw in him.

 

"Glorfindel!" Elrohir tugged at his father's braids. "Put me down, please!"

 

Elrond complied, lifted his son, and planted Elrohir firmly onto his feet. With much amusement, he watched Elrohir and Elladan remove their clothes and then run toward Glorfindel, thrusting themselves into the water, which had warmed as the sun had shone all day. His sons were in safe hands with Glorfindel and so he directed his attention to Erestor instead. "You saw what they did. Strip." Elrond was also in the process of removing his robes.

 

Erestor swallowed hard; his nervousness increased with each passing moment. "Elrond, please do not ask this of me. What if I scare them?"

 

"You have nothing we have not seen before, Erestor. The twins are used to swimming naked."

 

Erestor's gaze shifted from Elrond's face to where Glorfindel and the twins were splashing each other in the water. Glorfindel was a natural when it came to handling children and the warrior knew just how to make them giggle and laugh. "Elrond…" He still didn't think this was a good idea. The moment his gaze shifted back to Elrond to plead with the half-Elf, his lips froze in shock. Elrond was now naked as well and the half-Elf had cocked his head that *certain* way which meant that this wasn't up for discussion. "I know… strip," Erestor mumbled, saying the words so Elrond didn't have to repeat himself. Slowly, he began to remove his outer robes.

 

Realizing it would be wise to give Erestor time and privacy, Elrond waded into the water and was promptly splashed by his offspring. He joined in the fun, repaying his sons, and succeeding in dunking Glorfindel several times. The warrior resisted being pulled under and that only increased the twins' mirth.

 

In a quieter moment, Elrond turned to Glorfindel and gave his friend a thoughtful look. The twins were busy splashing each other and Elrond asked, "Is Erestor coming into the water already?"

 

"This is difficult for him," Glorfindel replied as he saw Erestor nervously fidget with his under tunic. "It has only been a few days since the cuts healed completely. His mind is still struggling to accept that he is whole again. For three long years he believed himself hideous."

 

"He never was hideous and I told him so. So did my wife, but Erestor never listened."

 

"It was hard for him to see the truth behind those words. He is coming into the water right now. Please excuse me." The fact that Erestor had undressed and was wading into the river pleased Glorfindel immensely.

 

Elrond peeked at Erestor from over his shoulder and smiled. There was some very faint scarring still left on the other Elf's chest area and his back, but only to Elven eyes. Elladan and Elrohir decided that moment to engage him in their play and Elrond indulged them, playing along. His only regret was that his wife wasn't here with them.

 

~~~

 

Glorfindel approached Erestor and smiled at seeing the look on his lover's face. "The water will not bite," he commented jokingly as he extended his hand.

 

"I know that." Erestor's voice sounded like a mixture of fear and determination. Elrond was making him do this and he couldn't back down now, especially now that Glorfindel had come to greet him. Seeing the expression in his lover's eyes, Erestor hissed, "I can swim!"

 

"I never said you did not know how to swim!" Glorfindel's smile faded and a frown appeared instead. "Why are you so tense?"

 

Erestor quickly submerged himself into the water until only his head showed. "Do you not know, Glorfindel?" His voice had gone from angry to pleading within seconds. "The scars…"

 

"Are almost gone." Glorfindel's expression and voice grew remarkably soft and he drew Erestor into his arms. "You are whole once more and I will tell you that as many times as you need to hear it." Erestor molded himself against him and Glorfindel tucked the dark head beneath his chin. For one long moment, he just held Erestor close and let his strong hands rub circles onto his lover's back. Their moment of utter bliss was interrupted by Elladan, who decided it might be fun splashing them.

 

"It appears someone demands your attention, Glorfindel." Erestor was a bit hesitant to play with the Elflings. He was still too used to hiding himself from their view.

 

"Not only Glorfindel," declared Elrohir, who had swum up to them. "You too, Erestor!"

 

"You had better give in," Elrond advised. "They will get their way eventually."

 

Erestor managed a weak smile and then released Glorfindel. "You want to play, little ones?"

 

"Catch us, Erestor!" Elladan and Elrohir immediately swam away from Erestor and into opposite directions.

 

"You go get Elladan and I will catch Elrohir for you," Glorfindel offered and gave his lover a sweet smile.

 

"No, that is not fair!" The twins had overheard Glorfindel's suggestion and glared at the blond Elf. "We want Erestor to catch us."

 

But Erestor nodded his head. "Sounds like a plan… my love." Adding those words had been hard on him as he still wasn't used to expressing his love for Glorfindel openly. The blond Elf had no such inhibitions and so Erestor was kissed passionately before the warrior swam off to catch his prey.

 

Elrond watched his friends chase after the twins. His sons moved fast and skillfully in the water and catching them would take his friends time. Seeing Erestor swim and smile so easily made his heart flutter with admiration and affection. It was good to see his friend healed after such a long time.

 

~~~

 

"Námo? To what do I owe the 'pleasure' of your visit on this lovely day?" Celeborn startled when the Vala's form manifested in his private chambers. He was alone and working on his correspondence when Námo chose to materialize seated in the chair opposite him.

 

"Celeborn, do not tell me I frightened you?" Námo chuckled. Their friendship had started – rather unexpectedly – after Celeborn's father had died. In his grief, Celeborn had cursed the Vala and Námo had reacted by visiting the distraught Elf. After calming Celeborn, Námo had found that he actually liked the Elf and so a series of visits had started. Over the course of several millennia they had become friends – if such a thing was possible between an Elf and one of the Vala.

 

Knowing it would irritate Celeborn to no end, Námo raised his legs and rested his feet against the rim of the impressive oak desk Celeborn was working on. Piles of paper shifted, collapsed, and Námo's chuckling grew louder at hearing Celeborn's feigned protest.

 

"Do you always have to make a mess of things? Do you have any idea how long it took me to sort those out?" Celeborn reached out and tried to save the little that was left of the former stack of papers. "What did you do this time?" The Vala was a mystery to Celeborn. The Elf-Lord had never given the nature of the Valar much thought – that was until he met Námo. The Doomsman of the Valar was nothing like he had expected.

 

"I am here to offer you a pact, my dear Celeborn." Námo smiled at the silver-haired Lord of the Galadhrim. Celeborn had always struck him as very fair, courageous, and even a bit adventurous. Those were the very qualities he now relied on. 

 

"A pact? That word has an ominous ring to it." Celeborn gave up saving the letters, threw his hands in the air in mock annoyance, and leaned back into the comfort of his chair. Steepling his fingers, he studied Námo. The Vala looked like he always did. White and grey streaks made the black hair seem alive and the mirror-like eyes threw his reflection right back at him. Námo was always hard to read. "And why did you come to me?"

 

"This matter is quite delicate in nature," Námo answered as he tried to predict Celeborn's reaction to his proposal. He hoped the Elf-Lord would accept.

 

"Delicate? And then they let you handle it?"

 

Námo laughed and gave Celeborn an amused look. "Yes, amazing is it not? But Celeborn, this is a serious matter so let us set the joking aside."

 

Celeborn nodded once. "Why are you here?"

 

Námo was still trying to find the right words to convince Celeborn. He had devised several speeches, but none of those would do now. "My brother is hungry for a new experience. The life of the Valar has been rather… well… boring… lately and Lórien has voiced that he is in need of a new thrill."

 

"Boring?" Celeborn arched a delicately curved eyebrow.

 

"You have no idea." Námo smiled ruefully at Celeborn. "And now stop interrupting me." He was surprised to find that he actually felt a bit nervous now that the moment had come. "I am in need of your body and that of Haldir's."

 

Celeborn had been in the process of sipping his tea and almost spat the liquid at the Vala. "You what?" He must have misheard!

 

"Haldir and you have been lovers for centuries and all this with your Lady's permission. Why did you take Haldir as your lover, Celeborn?"

 

"Because I love him."

 

"Do you love your wife?"

 

Celeborn blinked; why was Námo asking him such personal questions? He considered refusing to answer, but in the end, his curiosity made him reply. "The love I hold for Galadriel is of a different nature. I love her and when we make love it is in the hope to beget children, but there is little passion between us. It is different with Haldir."

 

Námo nodded his head repeatedly. "My marriage – and my brother's as well --- is the same. There is no passion between me and my wife and Lórien is in the same position. We have been watching the Firstborn and…"

 

"You started to meddle?" Celeborn cocked his head. "I *know* you," he stated, putting the emphasis on the second word. "I know what you are capable of."

 

"Maybe we did." Námo shook his head as if to gather his thoughts and decided to put them back on track. "My brother wants to engage in the act of lovemaking and we believe that it would be a more powerful experience if we were limited to the ways of the Firstborn."

 

Námo's request finally made sense to Celeborn and the Vala's appeal was making his head spin. "And so you decided to use my body? And Haldir's?"

 

"For several reasons, yes." Námo shifted on his chair. “The two of you are experienced lovers. You would not feel awkward waking up in each other's arms without knowing what happened – well, in a way you would know you had just made love."

 

Celeborn's eyes had narrowed. "Let us assume I would consider this, I would have to know for certain that Haldir would not end up hurt in any way."

 

Námo raised a hand in order to placate the Elf-Lord. "I have no intention of hurting my brother either. That is another reason why I turn to you now. You know how to prepare yourselves in order to keep yourself from being hurt by the act itself."

 

Celeborn's eyes continued to study the Vala. "Where would our fëar go during this time?" If he understood Námo correctly, the Valar would take over for the duration of their lovemaking.

 

"We would send your souls to the gardens of Lórien. Trust me, they are lovely and you will enjoy spending time there." Námo felt vexed that he was unable to read Celeborn's expression. "I would inhabit your body and my brother Haldir's. We would treat your bodies with respect and take good care of them."

 

For one moment, Celeborn's façade disappeared and he chuckled instead. "Do you plan to take your brother, Námo?" 

 

"I do. When I agreed to this I told him that it would be on my terms. So you would have to prepare Haldir." Námo wanted Celeborn to understand exactly what would happen.

 

Celeborn grinned. "I had better prepare myself as well. Lórien might want to return the favor." The Elf-Lord laughed loudly, seeing Námo's stunned expression. "It did not occur to you that your brother might turn the tables on you?"

 

"Not really."

 

Celeborn sobered and his serious expression returned. "*If* I were to do this for you, what would I gain?" Námo had mentioned a pact, so that meant there was something in it for him as well.

 

Námo, once more feeling on safe ground, quickly chased away any thoughts of his brother claiming him in turn and concentrated on Celeborn again. "One day, Haldir will face death. He will be fighting far away from here and you will not have any means to keep him safe. In return for your 'services' I will protect Haldir's back and ensure that he returns to you – whole and alive."

 

Celeborn's eyes revealed sudden distress. "The future plans on taking him away from me?"

 

"The battle at Helm's Deep will demand many lives and Haldir will be one of them. I am offering you a way to keep him alive." As he looked into Celeborn's shocked eyes, Námo knew that the Elf-Lord would do *anything* to keep his beloved Haldir safe. "You might not believe this, but I want Haldir and you to be happy. My brother thinks me a romantic and maybe I am."

 

"I can not decide this now. I need to discuss this with Haldir first." He could not make such an important decision without having consulted his lover. After all, it was Haldir's body Lórien would be using – and it was Haldir's life at stake.

 

Námo nodded his head in order to show that he understood and agreed. "I will visit with you tomorrow. Is that enough time?"

 

"Yes, it is." Haldir would come to him that evening and then they would discuss this.

 

Námo rose from his chair and walked away from Celeborn. "I hope and pray that you will accept, Celeborn. I can not keep Haldir alive for you any other way." Námo's form grew dim and then disappeared from Celeborn's rooms.

 

"I hope Haldir will accept this," Celeborn whispered, knowing only too well how stubborn his lover could be.

 

~~~

 

They sat in a gazebo in the gardens and no other Elves were near. Glorfindel enjoyed the fact that he had Erestor to himself once more. Ever since they had returned to their duties they had seen little of each other.

 

The dark-haired Elf was seated in front of him. Erestor's back rested against Glorfindel's chest and the warrior had wrapped his arms around his lover's waist. The fact that his hands were only inches away from Erestor's groin made him grow excited and he just knew that Erestor had to feel his arousal pressing against his back.

 

"You must be really glad to see me," Erestor commented, feeling comfortable enough to start off their conversation. He felt more confident since the morning during which Glorfindel had brought him to orgasm.

 

"I am… But something is on my mind and worries me."

 

Erestor sucked in his breath sharply. "What is amiss?" He looked at Glorfindel from over his shoulder and stared into hooded, lust-filled eyes.

 

"Do you remember the time when I mentioned binding myself to you to see you healed?"

 

"I do." Erestor blinked in surprise as he hadn't expected Glorfindel to bring up this particular subject. "What of it?"

 

"And you declined because you did not want me to enter a half bond. You felt that you would never be able to return any intimacy. Do you remember?"

 

Erestor nodded and his confusion mounted. "Why are you bringing this up now?"

 

"Are you still unwilling to bind with me? My greatest desire is to be your bonded mate – your husband – and you would be mine." Glorfindel held his breath in anticipation of Erestor's answer.

 

Erestor now turned in the embrace because he wanted to study Glorfindel's face better. "You want to bind? With me?"

 

Glorfindel released the breath he had been holding and chuckled. "I love you, and Elves in love bind themselves to each other. That *is* what they do. Why are you surprised?"

 

"Because… we did not even make love yet. How do you know you will like it? How do you know it will be enough for the rest of your life?" Erestor bowed his head and his hair fell in front of his face. "I love you, Glorfindel. I love you more than life itself, but… is that enough?"

 

"It is all I will ever need." Glorfindel caressed Erestor's hair and then raised the face so they could lock gazes. "And you will realize that as well, once you let go of this foolish idea that you are anything less than the perfect mate for me." Glorfindel licked his lips before saying this more directly. "I do not need to be inside of you in order to love you. Let that foolish notion go."

 

Erestor blushed and fidgeted with a lock of Glorfindel's hair. "But I want to be able to give you that. You deserve nothing less."

 

Glorfindel knew he was treading on dangerous ground, but went ahead any way. "When I began courting you, you were convinced that you could not deal with any intimacy. Now we are kissing, touching – intimately touching – and we brought each other to orgasm. I believe that if you really want to give me this that the day will come that you will be able to do this. I will never pressure you, Erestor, but I believe in you."

 

Erestor blinked. "You have that much faith in me?"

 

Glorfindel nodded once. "So much more than you will ever know." He leaned in closer to kiss Erestor. "And we could start practicing right now. Why do you not give me your answer after I am through loving you – for tonight that is!" Glorfindel was already busy unbuttoning Erestor's robes and sliding the fabric down his lover's shoulders. "I am certain you will want to bind with me after tonight." He gave Erestor his most blinding smile and then proceeded to lower his lover onto the grass.

 

Glorfindel removed his shirt and continued to smile at Erestor. His beloved wasn't as tense as he had been the first time they had been intimate, but he could still sense that Erestor was nervous. "Give me just one moment, my love." Glorfindel removed his leggings and uncovered a small phial from the folds of his cloak, which he had draped over a chair earlier. "You are still wearing too many clothes."

 

Erestor's mouth went dry now that Glorfindel was removing his leggings as well. Naked, Erestor drew in a deep breath and then his eyes traveled lower. Glorfindel was fully aroused and the head already dripped with pre-ejaculate. "Glorfindel, I…" He felt at a loss. He had told the golden-haired Elf that he couldn't be on the receiving end and, judging from the position he was in, he deduced Glorfindel was going to try any way. "Please, do not do this."

 

At first, Glorfindel did not know why Erestor was panicking, but then the situation they were in registered, and he firmly shook his head. "I will not take you, Erestor. You should know me better by now." He should have felt hurt, but didn't, as he knew where Erestor was coming from. "But if you allow it, I will take myself."

 

Erestor stared at Glorfindel with big eyes. "Take yourself?"

 

Glorfindel placed the phial aside for now and straddled Erestor's thighs. "Yes, I want to feel you inside of me, Erestor…" Moving closer, he sensually claimed Erestor's lips in a kiss. His hands roamed his lover's chest, tugging and toying with Erestor's nipples, which quickly hardened beneath his touch. His tongue trailed down Erestor's throat and chest and then he swirled his tongue around in his lover's belly button.

 

That touch made Erestor giggle and he sought out his lover's trusting gaze. Glorfindel really wanted him – wanted this – and would settle for nothing less than a bond. In a way he should feel flattered that Glorfindel wanted to make this official, especially considering the fact that he was far from untouched. It amazed him that someone so pure as Glorfindel wanted a lover who had been raped in the past. "Are you certain about this?"

 

Glorfindel stopped teasing Erestor's belly button long enough to look into the dark eyes. "Do you still have to ask? Do you not feel it?"

 

Yes, Erestor felt it – felt Glorfindel's love for him. It was all around him, enveloping him, and helping him once more to become the Elf he used to be.

 

Glorfindel read the answer in Erestor's eyes and returned to worshipping his lover's body. His fingers caressed his lover's flanks and then moved inward. He ran them along Erestor's inner thighs and his lips planted kisses there.

 

Erestor had thought that feeling Glorfindel's mouth on him had been earth-shattering, but nothing could have prepared him for this.

 

"I love you." Glorfindel made certain that he kissed all the places which made Erestor whimper in need. Running his fingers down Erestor's hard length, he looked into his lover's eyes once more. "May I proceed?"

 

The Valar help him, but he nodded yes. Erestor closed his eyes and his hands clawed at the grass beneath him now that Glorfindel poured cool oil over his member. That sensation told him what would happen next and Erestor acted quickly by opening his eyes and reaching for Glorfindel. The blond Elf had already raised himself and was about to impale himself when Erestor stopped him by grabbing hold of his shoulders. "I do not want you to hurt yourself."

 

Glorfindel looked at Erestor with all the love he was capable off. "You will never hurt me, Erestor." Sensing that his lover needed more reassurance, Glorfindel leaned in closer and wrapped an arm around Erestor's neck. While kissing Erestor's slightly bruised lips, he curled his fingers around his lover's slick length and positioned himself above the hard flesh. He continued kissing Erestor as he bit by bit lowered himself onto his lover's twitching member while never breaking eye contact as he continued to push down. That was how he saw the emotions flashing in Erestor's eyes and he smiled, sensing his lover's surprise. "Tell me what you are thinking – feeling." 

 

"By the Valar…" Erestor was at a loss for words now that Glorfindel's warm and tight channel settled around him. The warrior felt amazingly soft inside and Erestor groaned in delight. He had never thought it would be like this!

 

"Does it feel good?" Glorfindel had taken in his lover's length and rotated his hips, eager to feel more of him and in all the right places. And yes, Erestor's shaft now rubbed against his prostate, causing Glorfindel to collapse atop his beloved. Both Elves wrapped their arms around each other and returned to their kissing.

 

Glorfindel hardly moved. He continued to sway and rock atop of Erestor, instinctively knowing that it was what his lover needed. Maybe in time Erestor would learn to appreciate a bit of rougher love play, but at the moment, his lover needed to sense the connection between them. For now, he continued to circle his hips atop of Erestor.

 

Erestor was struggling for control. Glorfindel dominated their kiss and the way the blond Elf moved atop of him caused him to grow light-headed. This was perfect. This was what love was about and he knew the answer to Glorfindel's question in that very moment.

 

Glorfindel saw the pieces of the puzzle fall into place in Erestor's eyes. He was close, so close to coming! Changing the position of his arms, he slid them beneath Erestor's back and crushed his lover against his chest. "Erestor, I…" Unable to keep back any longer, he let go.

 

Erestor involuntarily arched his back and thrust against Glorfindel's sensitive gland one second before his lover was catapulted toward orgasm. Glorfindel buried his head in the raven hair and Erestor tightened his hold. Something hot and wet splashed onto his abdomen and then… then the clenching started. Glorfindel's inner muscles contracted around his flesh and Erestor thrust again, trying to climax himself. They clung to each other and, when Erestor finally came, the sensation was a true revelation. Finding release inside Glorfindel, Erestor lifted the warrior's head and pressed a loving kiss onto his lover's brow. The look Glorfindel gave him was one of utter bliss, love, and exhaustion.

 

Riding on waves of ecstasy, Erestor nodded his head once. "I will bind with you, Glorfindel. I love you and I want to be your mate."

 

Glorfindel, feeling drained from their intense lovemaking, pressed a kiss onto Erestor's lips. "I knew you would see it my way." He rested his head against Erestor's shoulder and relished the fact that his lover was still inside him. "This feels good. This feels right… and it will feel even better once we have spoken our vows."

 

Erestor patted the golden head and held Glorfindel tight. His member had softened and left his lover's body, but the connection remained. Yes, come what may, he would always love Glorfindel.

 

~~~

 

Haldir didn't quite know how to react after hearing Celeborn's news. "They want to do *what*?"

 

"Inhabit our bodies and make love." Celeborn idly ran his fingers down Haldir's muscular chest. He had wanted to discuss Námo's proposal before making love, but Haldir had thwarted his plans.

 

His lover had marched into his rooms, had grabbed him around the middle, and had proceeded to take in him a passionate way. Celeborn's head had reeled from the intensity of Haldir's desire and he had found himself on his back, on his desk, with his feet placed against Haldir's chest. His lover had only minimally prepared him and then claimed him with one firm stroke.

 

Haldir had surprised him; it didn't happen that often that Haldir assumed control and dominated their encounter. But that didn't mean that the Lord of the Golden Wood hadn't enjoyed being claimed in such a way. "They would do what we did just now." He chuckled, seeing Haldir blush to the roots of his hair.

 

"I… I hope I did not displease you. I do not know what came over me, but I just had to have you." Haldir peeked at Celeborn's relaxed face and it told him that his lover had enjoyed being taken. They had moved onto the couch afterwards, stroking and caressing, whispering words of love, and exchanging kisses. The last thing Haldir had expected was for his lover to bring up the Valar. "I do not know what to make of Námo's offer."

 

"He would keep you alive, Haldir," Celeborn whispered, caressing the strong face which he loved so much. They had been lovers for centuries and knew each other through and through. "I do not know if I can live without you. I would try – for Galadriel, my daughter, my grandsons, but… life would be empty without you."

 

Haldir considered his lover's words. "I have no intention of dying on you, my Lord."

 

But Celeborn shook his head and slid his long fingers into Haldir's silver mane. "A lot can happen during a battle. There only needs to be one enemy who gets his chance to attack from behind and you would be lost to me."

 

Haldir captured Celeborn's hand and brought it to his lips so he could kiss the elegant fingers. "You want to do this," he realized with amazement.

 

"I do." Celeborn drew in a deep breath and hoped he would find a way to convince his lover. "Letting them take over for one night is only a small price to pay to keep you alive. Do you not agree?"

 

Haldir wasn't quite convinced as yet, but had to admit Celeborn had made a valid point. He didn't want to spend eternity in the Halls of Waiting without Celeborn. Or even worse, see his lover wither away and maybe even die so he could be with him in the Halls. "And this is for just once?"

 

"As far as I can tell, yes." Celeborn, lying in Haldir's arms, propped himself up onto an elbow and searched the hazel eyes. "What do I tell him when he visits again tomorrow?"

 

Haldir shook his head. "Not you. *We* will tell him that we agree, but only if he vows to keep me alive."

 

Celeborn felt relieved now that his lover agreed to the plan. "Yes, *we* will tell him tomorrow and *now* I will claim you, March warden."

 

~~~

 

"You are going where?" Erestor thought he had misheard. He *must* have misheard!

 

"We are going to visit my parents, Erestor," Celebrían replied instead of Elrond. "We have not seen them in a year. Visiting the Golden Wood will do us good." She took Elrond's hand in hers and rubbed the knuckles. "And it will be good to have some privacy. I love our sons, but they are a handful." She suggestively wiggled an eyebrow at her husband.

 

Elrond promptly grew flustered. Celebrían had been in a peculiar mood all day long and her teasing had grown more explicit during the day. "Yes, that too." It wasn't the most eloquent reply he could give, but it was the only thing he could think of.

 

"You are not taking the twins with you?" Glorfindel, who had been quiet up until this point, frowned.

 

"They are still too young to travel for a long time. They will be more comfortable at home." Elrond had asked his wife the same question when she had proposed visiting the Golden Wood, but Celebrían had merely told him that it was necessary the twins stayed here. She didn't want to say why.

 

"And who will take care of them?" Erestor pinched the bridge of his nose. Just when he thought that things would return to normal in his life, something like this happened!

 

"We are leaving them in your care, Erestor. Yours and Glorfindel's," Celebrían stated in a determined voice. "You will look after them. For the next two months, you will be their father and mother." She giggled, seeing them throw stunned looks at her. "You will manage just fine," she added in an attempt to reassure them.

 

"I am not so sure of that," Erestor mumbled. This development worried him. How could Glorfindel and he replace the twins' parents? "Elrond, Glorfindel and I have no experience whatsoever in raising children!"

 

Celebrían giggled and once more replied instead of her husband. "I am certain that you will be quick studies. The twins will see to that."

 

Glorfindel had grown silent once more. He was also worried, but his reasons differed from Erestor's – he was afraid that his nightmares would come true.

 

~~~

 

"Did you and Haldir reach a decision?"

 

Haldir quickly turned his head. In the corner of Celeborn's study stood the two Valar. He had seen Námo once before when the Vala had been visiting with his lover, but he still felt curious, and even more so now that Lórien had materialized as well. He exchanged a look with his lover and assumed that the Lord of the Golden Wood would do the talking.

 

"Yes, we did." Celeborn nodded his head once and let his gaze stray from Námo's form toward Lórien's and was promptly taken aback by the Vala's beauty. Lórien vaguely reminded him of Glorfindel and Celeborn wondered if Lórien had taken this guise on purpose. "We agree to your proposal."

 

"You do?" Lórien had hoped they would, but only now believed that his dream might come true. "You agree to let us use your bodies so we can find out what making love is like?"

 

Námo gave his younger brother a displeased look. "They know what they are agreeing to."

 

Celeborn chuckled. When he had spoken with Námo, the Vala had tried to make him believe that he was in charge, but now, as he watched and listened to Lórien he wondered if it wasn't the other way around. After all, it was Lórien who was having his way. "And you will be true to your word, Námo? You will keep Haldir alive for me?"

 

"I will. You have my word." Námo's gaze locked with Celeborn's. "No harm will befall either your body or Haldir's. I promise that too."

 

Lórien nodded his head in a thoughtful way and added, "My brother speaks truthfully, Lord of the Golden Wood. We will treat your bodies with respect."

 

"And when will this happen?" Haldir asked in a soft voice. He still wasn't completely convinced yet that they were doing the right thing. /But Celeborn is doing this to keep me alive, and he is right: this *is* a small price to pay for my life./ 

 

"I suggest we make the switch tonight," Námo replied, not wanting to draw this out.

 

"Tonight?" Námo's haste surprised Celeborn and his eyes sought out Haldir's. "What do you say?"

 

Haldir just nodded once. He didn't want to wait either. "I agree."

 

"Tonight, then." Celeborn drew in a deep breath and wondered what the night would bring to Haldir and him, and the two Valar.

 

~~~

 

Erestor raised a shaky hand in goodbye. At the horizon, Elrond, Celebrían, and their escort finally disappeared from view. That left Glorfindel and him in charge – not only of Imladris, but also of the twins, who had been fighting back their tears, as they didn't want to cry while their parents could still see them.

 

Glorfindel patted Elladan's hair and hugged the tear-streaked Elfling close. Elladan was cuddled up to his chest and the tiny hands had buried themselves in Glorfindel's white shirt. "You are a very brave Elfling, Elladan." Seeing Elrohir shoot him a pleading look from the confines of Erestor's arms, Glorfindel added, "And you too, Elrohir. You are both very, very brave." Those words placated the twins and Glorfindel exchanged a worried look with Erestor.

 

"Glorfindel is right, little one," Erestor murmured, rocking Elrohir in his arms. "I know that it is hard on you to be without your parents… You are still so very young, but this is your chance to show them that you will be fierce and brave warriors one day."

 

Glorfindel's eyes twinkled; he understood Erestor's game plan and nodded once. "Yes, very brave warriors."

 

"Now that your Ada is gone it is up to you to keep Imladris safe. The two of you will inherit this lovely place one day and this is a perfect opportunity to show your Ada just how worthy you are to succeed him one day."

 

Glorfindel chuckled and thought, /Oh, you are so very cunning, my love!/ This way, the twins would be distracted and they even had a goal. They would try to be on their best behavior so Elrond could be proud of them the day he returned. "I will teach you how to become capable warriors and Erestor will teach you about ruling Imladris."

 

The tears were drying and the twins stared big-eyed at their tutors. "Ada and Nana will be proud of us when we do those things?" Elladan asked in order to make certain that the two adults were serious. "You will teach us how to be warriors?"

 

"And Advisors?" Elrohir added in a hopeful voice.

 

"Yes, and Advisors. What do you say, young ones? Are you willing to learn?" Erestor gave the two boys an encouraging look.

 

"Yes! Erestor, we want to learn so Ada will be proud of us," Elladan replied and Elrohir nodded his head enthusiastically.

 

"That has been decided then!" Erestor gave the boys a blinding smile.

 

That smile also blinded Glorfindel. He found it so very hard to believe that only a few weeks ago Erestor had been nothing but miserable. He felt immensely grateful that Námo had allowed him to return from the Halls. /I healed Erestor. My love healed him./ That was an awe-inspiring thought and, at the same time, that very thought made him feel humble. /I am so very fortunate to have your love, Erestor./ Erestor looked at him and Glorfindel wondered if his lover had actually caught his thoughts.

 

Erestor smiled. He didn't need to read Glorfindel's thoughts to know what was going on in his lover's head. The love in those blue eyes spoke for itself.

 

~~~

 

"What do you think will happen?" Haldir still felt uncomfortable, but reminded himself that he *had* agreed to this pact. Celeborn had prepared him for intercourse and he had done the same for his lover. It had been hard not to continue their touching, but the two of them had stopped in time, as they realized only too well that the two Valar would not be amused to find them already drained and having climaxed.

 

"Our souls will travel to the Gardens of Lórien," Celeborn replied. "That is all Námo would tell me." He was on his side, stretched out next to Haldir, and idly running a fingertip down his Marchwarden's chest. Haldir purred and closed his eyes. Normally those reactions would set Celeborn's desire off, but not this time. He, too, experienced a fluttery sensation in the pit of his stomach. The thought of allowing the Valar to take over their bodies was rather unsettling. "Just remember why we agreed to this. You will remain alive, Haldir. You will receive a chance to stay with me."

 

"I never thought I would meet my end in Helm's Deep fighting among Men. It makes me wonder what will happen in the future." Haldir suddenly experienced a strange, warm sensation that started at his toes and then traveled upward through his body. He cast a sharp look at Celeborn and saw the same surprise in his Lord's eyes. "Do you feel it as well?"

 

"This probably means this is it." Celeborn leaned in closer and pressed a kiss on Haldir's lips. "I love you. Always remember that."

 

Haldir returned the kiss and hoped his eyes told Celeborn all the Elf-Lord needed to know. The next moment, their surroundings faded and, after traveling through a dark tunnel, they suddenly found themselves in a most lovely field. The flowers were in full bloom and their heavy fragrances filled the air. A warm sun, gentle and playful, toyed with the flowers and the leaves of the trees and Haldir smiled, as he felt at ease here.

 

Celeborn blinked and realized something very important. He could no longer touch Haldir. The Marchwarden's form was still present, but the body was gone. It was like he was passing his hand through a shadow – his limb encountered nothing solid. "These must be Lórien's gardens, then. We have arrived."

 

"And what do we do now that we are here?"

 

"We enjoy the peaceful setting." Regretting that he could no longer pull Haldir into his arms, he moved closer toward his lover's essence. Their souls settled down as they accepted this arrangement and a gentle peace descended onto them as they started to wait to return to the Golden Wood and their bodies.

 

~~~

 

Námo blinked in surprise. He had taken on the guise of the Firstborn before, but had never 'owned' a body, had never limited himself in that way. Raising a hand, he stared at the limb in wonder. Being confined to a real body felt most odd, though not unpleasant. Námo sensed movement to his right and looked at Lórien, who was already in his arms and giving him a most peculiar look.

 

The first thing Lórien noticed was how warm and right he felt in his brother's arms. He was on his back and his head rested against Námo's chest, where his brother was on his side and watching him. One hand was still in the process of descending down his chest and the soft touch caused him to quiver. "So this is what it feels like." Being bound to a body and Middle-Earth was a revelation to the younger Vala, who loved to soar on the winds in the sky.

 

"It is most odd," Námo agreed. "Is it welcome? Is this what you desired?" As if acting on its own, his hand now traveled down his brother's groin. He had to admit that Haldir possessed a formidable body. The warrior was muscular, but not bulky, and Haldir's skin felt as soft as silk. Long, silver hair spilled down the shoulders and chest and, as he looked at the eyes, he found that their color had changed. Where Haldir's eyes were hazel, golden eyes now stared back at him. Their presence reminded him that he was dealing with his brother and not Haldir.

 

"What are you doing?" Lórien sucked in his breath now that Námo's fingers explored his groin area. The touch started a whole series of reactions in his lower body and he watched with interest how his member, which had been flaccid but a moment ago, now rose to attention. "That feels…" He lacked the words to describe the sensation.

 

Now that Lórien was too dazed to act, Námo did so instead. Lórien's idea to inhabit these bodies had not really appealed to him before, but he was growing interested in exploring now that his brother was reacting to his touches. "Did you watch them do this?"

 

"Make love, you mean? Oh…" Lórien closed his eyes in bliss and bit on his bottom lip when Námo continued to explore. Celeborn's large, strong hands now stroked the inside of his thighs, which he eagerly parted further. His eyes opened with a start, feeling Celeborn's heavy body settle atop of him. Staring into the mirror-like eyes, his heart missed a beat – which was another first sensation. Celeborn's body felt heavy atop of him and his brother pressed him down. One knee parted his legs further and his eyes almost bulged from their sockets as he felt the length pressed against his lower body. He almost expected Námo to take him right there and then, but instead of claiming him, his brother kissed him. 

 

The kiss was sweet and promising and Lórien found himself yielding to his brother. Those strong hands now touched him all over his body and the caresses were quickly overwhelming him. Lórien wondered about his brother's plans as he looked into the glass-like eyes.

 

"They already prepared themselves," Námo murmured, trying to reach a decision. "And I find I want you in that way."

 

Lórien arched his back and tried to get closer to his brother. "Then take me!" That was why he had started this in the first place!

 

Námo grinned; that was all the motivation he needed. "But not like this… Not on your back."

 

Lórien blinked again now that Námo was moving off of him. What were his brother's plans? Oh, they should have discussed this first! Maybe he had been a little rash when suggesting they should do this.

 

"Lórien, come on now, cooperate." Námo manhandled his brother until Lórien was kneeling on the bed and facing away from him. Kneeling behind him, Námo pressed his body close against Lórien's. "Lean back against me."

 

Surrendering to whatever his brother had in mind, Lórien did as he was told. Strong hands circled his middle and that hard flesh now rubbed teasingly against the entrance to his body. His breath came in small gasps and his eyes widened dramatically the moment that hard flesh began to force itself a way inside. "Ai!" It was nothing like he had thought it would be. Námo was in control and Lórien had little choice but to bear this invasion.

 

Námo did his utmost best to take his brother slowly, but his passion urged him to move faster and to touch Lórien in a deeper way. Sheathing himself, he guided the silver head against his shoulder. One arm stayed locked around his brother's waist, but the other hand moved down toward the groin area. He curled his fingers around the semi-erect member and stroked.

 

Never in his long existence had Lórien felt anything like this! His head lolled against his brother's shoulder and the sense of being possessed, of being helpless and at someone's mercy, excited him further. He grew hard in Námo's hand and then… then Námo thrust for the first time. The tip of the cock rubbed against a very sensitive area and he panted hard in surprise. "Oh…"

 

Now that Námo had found his target, he pulled Lórien even closer and set a slow rhythm. He, too, wanted this to last. He had never thought it would feel as divine as it did. The tight heat that surrounded him set off another reaction in his lower body. He reached his climax after a few more thrusts and yelled out his brother's name the moment he spilled his seed inside the warm channel.

 

Warm seed filled his insides and Lórien whimpered at the new sensation. "I am still hard," he whispered, eager to find release himself. 

 

Námo, still in the clutches of ecstasy, heard those words, but they didn't really register with him. He was too focused on savoring this sensation. Unexpectedly, Lórien moved away from him, which caused his softening member to slip from its momentary home. Droplets of seed still dripped from the head and he stared at it in wonder.

 

Lórien, however, didn't waste any time. In pursuit of his own orgasm, he turned around and faced his brother. The look of satiation that shone from those normally empty mirror-like eyes made him blink and he almost reconsidered his plans, but no, he needed release as well. /Just how strong is Haldir?/ He would find out in a moment. Determinedly, he pushed his hands beneath Celeborn's buttocks. Once he had a good hold on them, he shifted himself.

 

Námo didn't register Lórien's actions at first, but then he was being moved and suddenly he found himself lifted. "What are you…? Ai!" The penetration came completely unexpected. Lórien had lifted him, positioned him above the waiting erection, and then let gravity do its work. He sank down on the length and his buttocks settled against Lórien's upper legs. His brother had a tight hold on his waist and the grin on Haldir's face made him shake. "Lórien…"

 

"My turn, brother." Lórien used his hold on his brother's waist to raise him and, just when Námo expected to be lifted off the erection, Lórien impaled him again on the hard flesh. There was pain and there was pleasure. The mixture was balanced and he gritted his teeth against the discomfort.

 

Realizing that, for some reason, his brother wasn't enjoying the act as he had when he had been on the receiving end, Lórien changed his tactics by lying Námo down.

 

Námo found himself on his back with Haldir’s hard flesh still nestled snugly inside him. His legs were guided onto the strong shoulders and Lórien's eyes sparkled with mirth.

 

"I always wanted to have you at my mercy just once," Lórien announced in a heavy voice. At a painstakingly slow rate, he pulled out and then pushed in again. The thrusts gradually picked up in speed and depth and were also at the perfect angle to rub against the sensitive spot inside Celeborn’s channel. "I could grow addicted to this."

 

Námo was stunned to see his brother move above him with confidence and strength. There was little he could do, except accept that his brother *had* turned the tables on him and *was* taking him in a powerful way. He had never before been in such a vulnerable position. He was the Doomsman of the Valar, almost as powerful as Manwë himself, and yet, here he was – on his back and being taken by his younger brother.

 

"You are growing hard again." This pleased Lórien, who now changed the way he was thrusting into Námo. Where the thrusts been slow and shallow just a moment ago, they now became fast and deep. He was close, so close!

 

His mouth gone dry, Námo whimpered the moment Lórien wrapped his fingers around his awakening flesh. His brother timed those strokes with his thrusts and sent him into a second, even more shattering orgasm.

 

Lórien climaxed once the contractions around his member had started. "I love you and you know it." He smiled at Námo and found that he had indeed driven away the darkness -- the emptiness -- from those eyes. That was exactly what he had wanted to do.

 

The sensation of Lórien coming inside him made Námo scream. His control over Celeborn's body slipped and his spirit grabbed hold of his brother's. Both Valar were forced to leave the two trembling bodies and Námo wrapped his essence tightly around his brother's as he took them higher and higher, riding the winds and reaching for the moon.

 

They had never felt anything like this before.

 

~~~

 

Celeborn blinked now that their surroundings were changing once more. A moment later, he felt Haldir's heavy body collapse atop of his. Haldir's eyes mirrored that surprise as he too was returned to his body abruptly and Celeborn reached for his lover, pulling him close. By doing that, Haldir's member, still partly erect, moved deep inside him. "Oh…" He guessed this answered any questions he might have had. "You are still inside of me."

 

"And I love it," Haldir remarked jokingly. But at seeing the worried expression in Celeborn's eyes, the warrior slowly pulled out. "Are you…?"

"Hurt? No, I do not think so." Celeborn sat up and winced a little, feeling a bit sore, but that was nothing out of the ordinary. He had been sore on occasion after Haldir had made love to him. "And how about you, my love?"

 

Haldir sat cross-legged on the bed and took stock of himself. "Same as you, I think. A bit sore, but that is about it."

 

"I wonder if they liked it," Celeborn murmured, pulling Haldir against him. They moved until they rested their backs against a pile of pillows and then snuggled up to each other. "This is most strange. My body hums with pleasure, but I have no recollection of making love with you."

 

Haldir nodded against Celeborn's chest. Feeling drained, his eyes began to grow blank, but then shouting coming from the outside woke him again. "We should check on what is going on." With difficultly, he pushed himself to his feet. Wobbly, he started to make his way over to the doorway.

 

Celeborn quickly caught up with his lover and wrapped an arm around Haldir's waist to steady him. Apparently Lórien had been the most active one during the Valar's love play, exhausting Haldir in the process.

 

"My Lord! Brother! Look over there!" Orophin, who had been on watch duty that night, had hurried to his Lord's talan to inform Celeborn of the strange sighting. It didn't surprise him to see Haldir in his Lord's arms; he had known about their love affair for centuries. Haldir had never tried to hide his love for Celeborn from his brothers.

 

Following the direction Orophin was pointing in, Celeborn and Haldir raised their eyes toward the sky and blinked in wonder. Two lights, one golden and the other silver, traveled through the sky, illuminating the midnight heavens. They twirled around each other, moved even closer, and then seemed to explode before wrapping themselves around the other again.

 

A large number of Galadhrim had gathered to watch the phenomena, but only two of them – Celeborn and Haldir – knew what was causing the sensation. "I believe they enjoyed making love, then," Celeborn whispered and pressed a kiss against Haldir's throat. Everything felt right – Námo and Lórien were happy, Haldir wouldn't die in the future, and a sense of sensual joy was spreading throughout the Golden Wood. Celeborn smiled into Haldir's silver hair – yes, giving the Valar what they had wanted had been worth it!

~~~

 

"This is complicated, Erestor!" Elladan struggled to hold the quill in the position Erestor had shown him. In front of him was a piece of paper and it was smudged with ink blots and awkwardly written letters. This was his first writing lesson and the Elfling was growing annoyed that he couldn't duplicate Erestor's gracefully written letters. "I will never be able to do this!"

 

"Patience, young one!" Erestor seated himself next to the Elfling on the couch and placed his fingers above Elladan's so he could guide the tiny hand in that way. "All you need is patience and lots of practice. I was not able to write perfectly the first time I tried either, Elladan." Erestor stared at his hand – unmarred and with skin as delicate as it had been years ago. The last scars had disappeared and the skin was smooth once more. At times, he found it impossible to believe that he had healed and he still expected to wake up from this lovely dream.

 

"Erestor?" Elladan gave the adult a pleading look. "I do not want to do this anymore!"

 

"Are you giving up that easily, young Elladan? Are you going to disappoint me?" Oh, Erestor knew he wasn't playing fair, but felt that he was allowed to manipulate Elladan just a little as it was in the Elfling's best interest to continue.

 

Elladan's eyes darkened and his little fingers wrapped around the quill more forcefully. "I do not want to disappoint you."

 

Erestor decided to abandon the correspondence he had been working on and helped Elladan with his writing instead. And as he did, a gentle sense of peace came over him.

 

~~~

 

"So big… Horse is so big," Elrohir mumbled distractedly. He was seated – as far as he was concerned – rather high on Asfaloth's back and his fingers clawed at the stallion's white mane for support.

 

"Do you want me to put you back onto your feet again, Elrohir?" Glorfindel's hand rested against the Elfling's back and steadied him whenever he swayed. Elrohir was safe on Asfaloth's back. The stallion trotted carefully and Glorfindel could easily catch Elrohir, should the Elfling fall after all. "Are you scared?"

 

"I am *not* scared," Elrohir declared with emphasis, but then he added in a softer voice, "it is just too high." But he wouldn't allow Glorfindel to put him down! He was *not* a baby anymore!

 

~~~

 

"Captain? You asked about these." One of the guards handed Glorfindel the latest reports and then exited Erestor's study.

 

Glorfindel and Erestor had gathered there in order to talk and one of their subjects included discussing these latest reports on Orc activity. The twins were asleep on the couch. Elladan had curled himself protectively around Elrohir and both Elflings were sucking their thumbs.

 

Glorfindel read the reports and his brow knitted. "Erestor, this is not good – not good at all." He expected Erestor to inquire to why he had said that, but the Chief Advisor remained silent. "Erestor?" When his lover still didn’t react to his voice, Glorfindel looked up from the report and studied his beloved instead. Erestor's gaze was trained on the twins and Glorfindel easily picked up on the love radiated by those dark eyes.

 

Erestor's affection for the twins made sense. His lover had told him that he had rocked them when they had been babies and that he had then had cut himself out of their lives for three years. Erestor had a lot to catch up on. "Erestor, did you hear me?"

 

Erestor finally shook himself from his musings and shifted his look from the twins to Glorfindel. "I am sorry," he answered, blushing, "I did not hear what you said."

 

"There has been an increase in Orc activity near our Northern border." Glorfindel probed Erestor's dark eyes. "I want to increase the number of our patrols… Agreed?"

 

Erestor nodded his head. "Agreed. Do whatever you must to keep them out of our lands." He fervently hoped that he would never happen upon one of those vile creatures again. They had hurt him too much in the past "Do you remember that night when you confided your nightmares to me?"

 

"I do." Glorfindel's eyes narrowed; what was Erestor trying to tell him?

 

"I have a nightmare of my own and hearing that the sightings have increased bring it back to my mind."

 

"What is it about?" Glorfindel placed the report aside, rose from his chair, and walked over to Erestor, who was seated behind his desk. He came to a halt behind his lover and placed his hands on the trembling shoulders. "You can tell me what burdens you, Erestor… Always."

 

Erestor's gaze momentarily darkened now that he was about to confide in his lover. "My greatest fear is that I have to face those Orcs again. Like you would freeze upon encountering a fire, I would be struck motionless if one of them happened to block my path. And now that the sightings have increased…"

 

Glorfindel leaned in closer, rested his chin on Erestor's dark head, and squeezed his lover's shoulders. "You promised me to be there for me, should I ever have to face a fire and I want to make the same promise to you. I will keep you safe from those Orcs. Not one of those foul creatures will ever touch you again. I will take their heads before they can come close to you. That is my vow to you, my love…" It almost felt like speaking the vows of eternal love which would officially bind them. "Erestor?" He let his voice trail off in order to feed Erestor's curiosity.

 

It worked. Erestor arched an eyebrow. "What?"

 

"I was thinking…"

 

Erestor's eyebrow inched higher and he moistened his lips in anticipation. Glorfindel was drawing this out for a reason!

 

"Maybe we could speak our vows upon Elrond's return?"

 

"And bind?" Erestor's throat went dry. Yes, they had discussed this before, but this was the first time that Glorfindel was setting some sort of date. "I expect him back in three months."

 

"Perfect! That gives us ample of time to come up with our vows." Glorfindel pressed a kiss onto Erestor's raven head. "That is, if you will have me."

 

"Of course!" Erestor smiled. "I will have and hold you for always!"

 

~~~

 

"Sleep well, young Elladan." Glorfindel gave the twin a tight hug and then laid him down onto the bed the twins shared. "Go to sleep. There will be a new day tomorrow and then I will give you your first sword fighting lesson." It sounded much more dangerous than it was. Elladan's sword would be a stick and they would be more wrestling than sword fighting. What he wouldn’t do just in order to distract them from missing their parents!

 

"Night, Glor… night… res…tor…" Elrohir was already dozing off. There was only one problem. His fingers were tightly curled around Glorfindel's braids and left the warrior with no escape.

 

"It appears you will be spending the night here then." Erestor giggled, allowing his mirth a way out. He stood next to the bed and gave the twins an adoring glance. "Why do you not stay with them for a little while? I still have to finish my correspondence anyway. Thranduil must already be growing impatient now that he has not received an answer yet."

 

"But you will rescue me later?" Resigning himself to his fate, Glorfindel lay down and drew the twins close. The Elflings' reactions were instant and they hugged him close. Their greedy little fingers now also clawed his shirt. "The Valar help me."

 

Erestor smiled, bent forward, and placed a loving kiss on Glorfindel's cheek. "I will rescue you in a bit… I doubt the Valar are interested in prying little Elflings' fingers loose from your shirt. However, *I* might do so later."

 

"Thank you, Erestor, and now hurry up with correspondence so you may rescue me shortly." Glorfindel didn't really mind being the twins' prisoner – it was just that he would have preferred to be Erestor's instead.

 

~~~

 

Screams, loud bangs, and the sharp sound of metal meeting upon metal, reached Erestor's ears as he sat hunched over his letter to Thranduil. It was the middle of the night and most Elves *should* have been asleep, but the commotion continued and even increased in intensity. Growing curious, and a little frustrated, Erestor rose from behind his desk and headed for the window. He was about to cast a look onto the courtyard below when an arrow hit the window. The glass splintered into several pieces and came crashing down. Alarmed, Erestor carefully looked outside. The next moment, his heart threatened to stop beating as he saw the Imladris guards fighting off a large number of heavily armed Orcs.

 

"Oh no…" The words, nothing more than whispers, escaped him, and voiced his utter distress. "The twins!" From where he was standing he had an excellent view of the nursery and his distress increased at finding the Orcs were shooting burning arrows into the twins' rooms.

 

Erestor's thoughts raced. One part of him wanted to lock himself up in his study and hide beneath the desk, or seek refuge in the closet, but another part of him told him to run over to the nursery to check on his lover and the twins.

 

"I can not go out there!" Erestor felt like pulling out his hair. "There are Orcs out there!" And Orcs had hurt him in the past – had tortured and raped him! He couldn't face them again! Never again!

 

"But what about Glorfindel?" Another look out of his window told him that a fire had started in the nursery and that the flames were already reaching out of the window, ready to spread to the surroundings suites. "I can not abandon him now! I vowed to help him!" And Glorfindel was afraid of fire – had nightmares about it! He couldn't desert his lover now!

 

His study was adjourning to Elrond's and the Chief Advisor quickly entered the Elf-Lord's rooms. Out of remembrance, Elrond still kept some of his weapons here and Erestor reached for the elegant, but heavy, sword that the half-Elf had used in the Battle of the Last Alliance. Under normal circumstances he would not have been able to wield the heavy sword, but his love for Glorfindel, his fears and hopes, gave him supernatural strength. He just prayed that his strength wouldn't desert him the moment he faced his first Orc. 

~~~

 

"Glorfindel! It is hot!" Elladan cried out in misery. The flames were trying to reach him and he pulled away, trying to escape their clutches. "Glorfindel!" Glorfindel was the only adult near and the twins automatically turned to him for protection.

 

Glorfindel felt terrified. During the last few seconds the fire had begun to fill the room and the flames blocked their escape route. Glorfindel had pushed himself into a kneeling position and the twins clung to him. Their fear only added to his terror. He wanted to act – knew he had to act *now*, but his body refused to move. He felt paralyzed, just as in his dream. /Move it! Move it!/ he told his body, but nothing happened. The twins began to cry harder and Elladan screamed out in agony as flames began eating his nightshirt.

 

/Put it out! Put the fire out!/ Glorfindel tried moving his hands to put the fire out, but nothing happened. Terror consumed him and tears escaped his eyes. He wanted to help the Elflings, but his body remembered the fire, the pain, the agony, and had completely shut down. /We are going to die in here… Die in the fire./

 

~~~

 

Erestor moved stealthily through the corridors and managed to avoid the few Orcs which had managed to penetrate the house's defenses. At last, he reached the door to the nursery and he pushed it open. A surge of fire reached for him and he had to momentarily retreat from the doorway. Once the fire died down a little, he pressed forward. His heart missed several beats at the horrible sight that greeted him.

 

Glorfindel and the twins were on the bed. Elladan was screaming and Elrohir was doing his best to put out the flames eating away at his twin's nightshirt. The Elfling was using a blanket to extinguish the fire and Elrohir's face was wet with tears due to the fear he was in. "Glorfindel!" Erestor screamed his lover's name in the hope to wake him from his shock, but his lover remained oblivious to his screams.

 

"Erestor! Help!" Elladan had noticed the Advisor and raised his arms, trying to reach for him.

 

Erestor drew in a deep, steadying, breath, placed the sword against the wall, and quickly stripped off his formal robes. They would catch fire much too quickly. Clad in his leggings and shirt, Erestor grabbed hold of his raven mane and forced the hair under his shirt, so it wouldn't get in the way. "I am coming for you! Hold on!"

 

Erestor had no time to think his actions over. The fire was the strongest near the corners of the room and he cunningly found a way through the lake of flames. He suffered a few burns in the process, but at this point, he didn't even notice them.

 

The moment he reached the bed, he grabbed hold of a corner of a blanket and used it to smother the flames that had been burning Elladan's nightshirt. "Elladan, climb onto my back! Elrohir, grab hold of my waist!" The twins wasted no time and did as they were told. They slung their arms around Erestor's neck and waist and clung tightly. Erestor, who still had his hands free, shook Glorfindel violently. "Glorfindel, we need to go! Right now!" But the warrior simply stared back at him. The fire was reflected in those eyes. They looked red instead of their normal blue. "I can not carry you as well!"

 

But it looked like he had no choice – Glorfindel still refused to move. "Elrohir, join your brother on my back!" Erestor didn't know if he had the strength to do this. There was only one way to find out, though.

 

The twins now clung to Erestor's back, hugging his waist with their legs and keeping their arms around the Advisor's neck. Erestor didn't stop to think – he simply slipped his arms below Glorfindel's back and knees and lifted him like a baby. He would pay for overexerting himself later, but that didn't matter to him now. His love for Glorfindel made him do the impossible and he cradled the warrior against his chest.

 

Erestor acted mechanically and placed one foot in front of the other, his subconscious guiding him through the fire. He no longer felt like himself – he lost all contact with his self and became something more – someone stronger.

 

When he finally reached the corridor, he threatened to collapse, but he pushed himself on. He couldn't give up now that he was so close to safety. One more step… and then he put Glorfindel down. He kicked the door shut, blocking Glorfindel's view of the fire. "Glorfindel!" Shaking him hard once more, Erestor felt relieved when the warrior's vision seemed to clear up.

 

Glorfindel blinked… and blinked again at finding himself in the corridor. A series of intense shudders shook his frame and then he collapsed against Erestor. "Ai…" He had been conscious of Erestor's actions the entire time. He had wanted to call out to his lover to take the twins into safety first, that he would slow them down, but Erestor had kept his word and had rescued him – in every sense of the word. "You came back… You rescued me… us."

 

Erestor, not yet allowing himself to give in to exhaustion, raised Glorfindel's face by lifting it with one finger. "Glorfindel, I need you. The Last Homely House is swarming with Orcs. The guards are making a valiant effort to fight them back, but they need you to direct their actions!"

 

"I am Captain here," Glorfindel declared, composing himself again. "I will deal with the threat." He was about to take off and join his guards, but not before addressing Erestor again. "And after that, I will thank you for rescuing me – us – properly."

 

Erestor managed a weak smile. "I will take the twins to Elrond's rooms." Elrond's private chambers were the least likely place to be invaded by the Orcs because of their location. Elrond had chosen those rooms for exactly that reason. "Glorfindel?"

 

Glorfindel frowned, wondering why Erestor was stalling.

 

"You might need this." Erestor handed Glorfindel Elrond's sword. "Use it well and end the lives of those vile creatures."

 

"I will." Glorfindel pressed a quick kiss onto Erestor's brow and then took off in the opposite direction.

 

~~~

 

The twins had settled a bit more comfortably on Erestor's waist, one of them on each side, and Erestor had wrapped his arms around them protectively. They sat in a corner of Elrond's rooms, hidden beneath a pile of throws and blankets. He knew that he didn't stand a chance fighting the Orcs. Even if he could muster the physical strength to fight them off, his mind would play tricks on him and make him relive what had happened three years ago. Their best chances were in hiding and remaining unnoticed.

 

"Erestor, why is Ada not here?" Elrohir whispered the words as he didn't want to be discovered either. His father was his hero and Elrond should be here to save them!

 

"He will be here shortly." Erestor had no real answer to soothe the distressed twin. He was more worried about Elladan than Elrohir though. "Did the fire reach you, Elladan? Did it burn you?" His face, hands, and left shoulder had also carried away burns, but he was an adult, he could choke down the pain, but Elladan was only an Elfling!

 

"My toes," Elladan whispered in a pained voice. "But I am strong. I am not a baby anymore."

 

Erestor felt deeply for the hurt Elfling. "Once the Orcs are gone, I will attend to your toes, little one." He sucked in his breath now that the shouting crept closer; those weren't Elven voices. The Orcs must be in the process of retreating and were being chased down the corridors. /Do not let them find us!/ But Erestor's prayer wasn't granted and the door to Elrond's rooms came crashing down. Judging by the amount of footfalls he was hearing, at least three, maybe four or five Orcs had stumbled into Elrond's rooms.

 

"We are losing the fight! They are stronger than we thought!"

 

Erestor allowed himself to grow hopeful. The Orcs sounded rather desperate. That meant Glorfindel and the guards were winning! "We must be really quiet now… They can not find us, do you hear?"

 

The twins literally bit their lips in order to make certain that they remained perfectly silent. They clung to Erestor with desperation but couldn't stop their little bodies from shaking.

 

Suddenly the commotion in the room died down and Erestor's heart missed a beat with fear. Unexpectedly, the pile of blankets was attacked and the Orcs pulled their cover off of them.

 

"Oh, look here!" One Orc grinned at the exposed Elves. "We have hostages! They are our way out of here!"

 

Erestor felt entranced and taken back in time. He had faced Orcs before and knew what they were capable of. "Let the little ones go… You would still have me." He slowly pushed himself onto his feet and moved Elrohir and Elladan behind him. The twins each hugged one of his legs and tried to hide behind him. "They are only children."

 

"Oh no, they are not going anywhere!" The leader of the Orcs studied Erestor closely. Somehow this Elf struck him as familiar. Had he seen him before? That long raven hair, those emotional brown eyes…

 

Erestor's eyes searched his surroundings for some kind of weapon but instinctively knew he wouldn't find one. Elrond wouldn't keep any weapons here as his wife and children shared these chambers. He would never risk them hurting themselves.

 

"I know you…" The leader removed his knife from its sheath, raised it, and pressed the sharp tip against Erestor's throat. "Didn't I get my hands on you three years ago?" Erestor began to tremble fiercely and that reaction told the Orc what he needed to know. "Oh yes, I remember now… I had a good time hurting you… Shouldn't you be dead though?"

 

Erestor's heart couldn't take this anymore and stopped beating for a long moment. This was the Orc who had raped him, not once, not twice, but three times before throwing him to the rest of the pack. This was the horrid truth he had never told Elrond, or Glorfindel for that matter. The pain he had suffered came crashing back on him and made him stagger. He would have dropped to his knees, if it hadn't been for the twins holding onto him.

 

The Orc laughed hard. "I might just have to rape you again to finish the job!" He raised his hands and reached for Erestor. He never managed to touch the raven-haired Elf though as a golden whirlwind suddenly invaded the room. The last thing the Orc was aware of before dying was the touch of cold metal against his neck.

 

The head of the Orc fell onto the floor with a loud thud and Erestor gasped, seeing the headless creature sway. His instincts kicked him into action and he spun around, lifting the twins. He took several steps away from the beheaded Orc, which now fell forward. The Orc dropped onto the floor and all Erestor could do was stare at the lifeless body.

 

"Erestor!" Elladan, wide-eyed, tugged at Erestor's hair in order to get his tutor's attention. Elrohir and he were scared and trembled over their entire bodies. They needed Erestor to rock them and reassure them that everything would be all right.

 

Erestor however only had eyes for Glorfindel. Single-handedly, the golden-haired Elf dealt with the remaining Orcs. Once the threat had been dealt with, the warrior advanced on Erestor. He had overheard the Orc's remarks and had quickly figured out who the vile creature was and what had truly happened to his beloved Erestor. Hugging Erestor, he whispered into the other Elf's ear. "They are dead… *He* is dead…"

 

He refused to make the same mistake twice and gained a tight hold on Erestor's hand. "You are coming with me. I am not letting you out of my sight again." He was about to pull Erestor and the twins with him when the sound of a horn vibrated through the air. "What?"

 

A scream, telling the guards to attack, sounded and Glorfindel suddenly realized the identity of the new arrival. "It is Elrond!" But why had the half-Elf returned so early? The Elf-Lord had only left two days ago! He let go of Erestor's hand and ran over to the window so he could look onto the courtyard, and yes, there he was – Elrond, leading the charge.

 

The adrenaline which had kept Erestor going so far faded and the dark-haired Elf slid down the wall and onto the floor. He had asked too much of his body – carrying the twins and Glorfindel out of that burning room now demanded its toll.

 

"Erestor!" Upon hearing the sliding sound, Glorfindel had turned around and now headed over to his beloved. The twins let go of Erestor's form and settled down on the floor, visibly shaken.

 

"You are safe now," Glorfindel murmured, trying to reassure all three of his charges. "We are all safe now."

 

"Ada is here?" Elrohir asked in a tiny voice. He crept closer to Elladan and wrapped his arms around his twin. "Elladan's toes hurt."

 

Glorfindel busied himself by checking on the rather minor injury, but fussed over Elladan until the Elfling looked more comfortable. He was about to lift the twins to take them to the Healing House when Elrond and Celebrían stormed into the room.

 

The half-Elf flung his sword onto the floor before coming to a halt in front of his sons. Seeing their soot and tear-streaked faces, he reached for them. Elladan jumped into his arms and Elrohir went into his mother's, enjoying being held and rocked by her.

 

"Elladan!" Elrond pressed him close and thanked the Valar that they had watched over their sons. "I was so worried – so afraid."

 

"My toes, Ada…" Elladan, loving all the attention he was getting from his father, stuck his toes out from beneath his burned nightshirt.

 

Elrond quickly checked on his son's injury and was relieved to find that only the toe nails had been singed a little bit. "I will make it all better," the half-Elf promised and rocked Elladan in his arms.

 

Elladan forgot about the discomfort he was in and smiled against his father's chest.

 

Realizing it was up to him to take charge, Elrond ordered, "Glorfindel, take Erestor to the Healing House. I will take Elladan there as well and Celebrían will take care of Elrohir." He was needed in the Healing House right now as a large number of guards had been injured. Erestor also looked like he needed a healer to look him over. Once everyone's injures had been attended to, he planned to find out what exactly had happened here during his absence!

 

Elrond and Celebrían exited the rooms, carrying their sons.

 

Glorfindel turned his attention back to his lover and stroked the raven hair out of Erestor's face. A face which had turned dark with ash and red with burns. "You risked your life to save me."

 

"I promised you I would… I always keep my promises." Erestor smiled in spite of his fatigue and caressed Glorfindel's face. "And you rescued me in turn, my love. That creature…"

 

Glorfindel stopped Erestor when the dark-haired Elf began to turn his head so he could look at the decapitated body. "Do no to do that."

 

Erestor nodded and his gaze locked with Glorfindel's once more. "How much did you hear?"

 

"Enough to take an immense pleasure in ending his wretched life."

 

"And you still want to bind with me?" Erestor's breath hitched.

 

"I do." Glorfindel leaned in closer and kissed him on the lips. When he pulled back, Glorfindel found that the large, dark eyes had lost awareness. Erestor had finally given in to exhaustion.

 

~~~

 

Glorfindel had carried Erestor to the Healing House and the healers were now looking after the burns the Advisor had suffered. In the meantime, Glorfindel was visiting with Elrond and Elladan. "How does Elladan fare?"

 

"He will be fine." Elrond looked adoringly at the sleeping Elfling in his arms. "Do you know what he said? That he had gained his first battle wound. What have you been up to during my absence? He told me he was a brave warrior now."

 

Glorfindel quickly informed the half-Elf and Elrond chuckled. "You did well by distracting them."

 

"Elrond, why did you return early?" Glorfindel was dying to hear the answer to his question.

 

"It was Celebrían. A vision told her that our sons were in danger." Elrond stroked Elladan's hair. "Are you well, Glorfindel?" He read something in those blue eyes, but didn't quite know what it was.

 

"I am well." Glorfindel nodded and smiled. "I do have one last request though."

 

"What is it?" Elrond had already stood. He was eager to reunite his little family.

 

"I asked Erestor to bind with me. Will you be there as well? As a witness? You and your family?"

 

"I am honored that you want us there… We will be there -- of course. I would not want to miss that." Elrond gave Glorfindel a thoughtful look. "Thank you for helping him heal – for loving him. You made a huge difference."

 

Glorfindel smiled. "He is easy to love, Elrond – so very easy."

 

~~~

 

One week later, a small group of Elves gathered beneath an ancient oak tree. Elrond, Celebrían, and their sons sat down at a distance from the couple who were about to speak their vows. The branches of the tree swayed softly in the wind, producing their own music. Lindir sang a song in the distance – a song about love and dedication – and while Lindir sang, Melpomaen pressed a kiss onto the back of the minstrel's hand.

 

Erestor and Glorfindel exchanged vows of love and had never been happier before. They hugged, kissed, and held each other close. The twins giggled and even applauded when the kiss deepened, making Erestor blush.

 

Elrond looked at his two friends and smiled happily. He had always hoped that Erestor would find love one day, but he had almost given up hope – that was until Glorfindel had made his intentions known. He thanked the Valar that Námo had allowed Glorfindel to leave those Halls.

 

~~~

 

Unknown to the Imladris Elves, the Doomsman of the Valar and the Master of Dreams stood close by and were intently watching the ceremony. Námo's arm was snaked around Lórien's waist and his younger brother sighed in approval.

 

"We meddled well," Lórien commented as he smiled happily at seeing Glorfindel kiss Erestor. "I am glad we did."

 

Námo nodded his head once and rested his chin on his brother's shoulder. Ever since they had made love, his understanding had deepened and he now realized just how much Lórien was a part of him. They had not been apart since that night in the Golden Wood. "They are happy."

 

Lórien tilted his head and smiled at his brother. "And so are we."

 

 

After word

 

The dead surrounded him. Everywhere he looked, Haldir saw death. His friends -- Elves he had fought side by side with for centuries -- had fallen under the onslaught of Orcs and Uruk-Hai. Helm's Deep was one big trap and would become their grave – including his. In that moment, he no longer believed that Námo could keep him safe.

 

Dazed by the amount of lives lost around him, Haldir only vaguely heard Aragon's command to fall back. He managed to shout the order to the small number of Elves which were still surviving, but then his gaze was drawn back to the dead Elves at his feet. This was the end – *had* to be the end.

 

A shifting of the wind behind him told him that the enemy had snuck up on him and was raising his weapon. This was it, then – the end. His last thought was for his lover, for Celeborn. /I am so sorry I failed you./

 

But the blow never fell. The weapon dropped onto the stone floor with a metallic sound instead and Haldir spun around to see who had saved him. Behind him stood a formidable warrior. Wearing no armor, he should have seemed vulnerable, but he didn't. This warrior wielded an incredible sword, which was much heavier and broader than an Elven sword. Black hair, streaked with white and grey, danced around his head and in the glass-like, transparent eyes shone an unholy light.

 

"Fight, child!"

 

The command seemed to bring him back to life, and Haldir lifted his sword. Fighting side by side, they ended one life after another and, when the battle finally came to an end, they were the last two standing in that particular section of the Hornburg.

 

Haldir raised his eyes, locked gazes with Námo and wanted to thank him for saving his life, but the Vala merely laughed and disappeared from view.

 

/Haldir!/

 

Celeborn's thoughts, panicked and full of fear, reached Haldir, and he was surprised to find that his lover's mind could cross such a distance. /I am here… I am still alive… Námo kept his promise, my Lord./

 

/Hurry home to me, Haldir. I need you at my side./ Even in spite of Námo's promise to keep Haldir safe, Celeborn had felt terrified that he might lose his lover.

 

/I will return to you. Do not doubt that./ Celeborn's thoughts faded from his mind and Haldir raised his gaze to stare at the sky. He simply couldn't look at the dead any longer. And as he looked up, familiar lights were chasing each other in the dark heavens. Haldir found comfort in the presence of the Valar, knowing that they would look after the souls of his fallen comrades. /I am coming home, Celeborn. I love you…/

 

~~~

 

As Haldir walked away from the battle field, Námo, aided by Lórien, gathered the souls of the fallen Elves close. Cradling them in their warm presence, they took the brave fëar to the Halls – Halls which were full of light and love now that Lórien resided there as well, seated at his brother's – and lover's – side.

 

Love had finally found and filled those empty Halls – and their master.

 

The end


End file.
